determinedest: (* All you can do is FIGHT.)
* Despite everything, it's still you. ([personal profile] determinedest) wrote in [community profile] entrancelogs2016-12-26 02:55 pm

standing on the edge of my broken dream, searching for some kind of peace [OPEN + CLOSED]

Who: Frisk, some closed starters, and then YOU
Where: By the Rabbit Hole and then in gay baby jail
When: 12/27 and onward
Rating: PG-13 and up for a suicide attempt
Summary: The world turns on and on without me. This I know well. And yet I wonder. Despite seeing the same places, the people are never in the same spot. The only thing that remains is ȟ᷾̚ö͎᷆w͒̽̎ I̟᷿᷃ f̸̴᷾ͧ̑᷾͘e̯̮͖̓᷾ͧ͊l͈̭̼̟᷅̕͞l͏̶͆ͭ͊͌ͅ.

                                * Alphys might work faster.

* But the old Royal Scientist, Doctor ██▓░ █▓▓░▒▋?                         

* One day, he vanished without a trace.
                                                                                                * They say he shattered across ti̶͉̐me̺̻᷇ and s͕̥̃p̈́̾̇á̪̤c̨̙̿e̐̒͑.

                                          * Ha can I say so without fear?

                                                                                                        * I'm holding a piece of him right h̷͔͖e̮̻̍re̲̾͟.
catchacold: :( (bruised - pathetic)

[personal profile] catchacold 2016-12-31 11:33 am (UTC)(link)
[It only takes Leonard a few moments to open the lock - he's still who he is after all - and once he's inside he leans back against the door, actually sinking down to the ground to sit there, legs stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles. He has his arms loosely wrapped around himself, face still showing quite the array of bruises.

Looking around he doesn't even say anything at first, giving them some time before starting a conversation.]

Happy holidays, eh?
catchacold: :( (bruised - beaten down)

[personal profile] catchacold 2016-12-31 07:26 pm (UTC)(link)
You spoke to Mick.

[He says it as if that should explain it all and he supposes it kind of does. Not the intricate details, but they know a lot about that too and so it really shouldn't be that surprising on the whole.]

Funny thing is that we did it before. In his future, my past. Let him beat on me, kill me if he wanted. Didn't kill me then either.

['Funny' is relative.]
catchacold: :( (aurora)

[personal profile] catchacold 2016-12-31 07:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Happened before you spoke to him, for the record. Just meant, you met him, shouldn't be a shock.

[Plenty of anger left, even after the beating. But most importantly, he wants to break open the circle of guilt a little. Some things have nothing to do with Frisk. A lot of things, actually.]

I did deserve it. Do.

[Of course they'd get it.]
catchacold: :( (frigid)

[personal profile] catchacold 2016-12-31 08:01 pm (UTC)(link)
No. Helped him, I hope.

[Not feel better, but at least calmer. Helps keep the anger focused on him too. Worthwhile, on the whole.]

Ain't anything gonna make my mistakes less.
catchacold: :( (walls breaking)

[personal profile] catchacold 2016-12-31 10:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Don't think anybody can. Ain't how mistakes work. You can fix them, you can just deal with the consequences.

[He thinks about Mick and looks at them, wishing he could offer comfort instead of whatever this bleakness is supposed to be.]

Try to help the people we owe instead of hurting them.
catchacold: :( (cold light)

[personal profile] catchacold 2016-12-31 10:37 pm (UTC)(link)
That's cause you got your whole deal going on, kid. You ain't used to dealing with consequences, you operate differently. Least you used to.

[He's learned a lot about their world in their many conversations. He's learned a lot about them.]

Nobody likes consequences. Ain't no clean way to resolve that. No fresh start, it's messy and hurts. But it's how you learn how to deal. How everyone learns.
catchacold: :( (sitting down)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-01 03:58 am (UTC)(link)
I've never been any good. I just want you to be, Frisk.

[He pulls one leg up, wrapping an arm around it, his eyes never looking away from them.]
catchacold: :| (temperature falling)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-01 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
I don't really care whether I am. I do things because I want to do them, whether they're good or bad.

[He shrugs, finally putting a hand inside his jacket and retrieving a package.]

Do you want your present?

[He holds out the simple package. Inside they'll find a flute that he's whittled himself, nothing else. What do you gift someone who just wants it all to end?]

Happy Hanukkah.
catchacold: :) (Default)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-01 08:24 am (UTC)(link)
Sure. Hanukkah's not about the good kids getting stuff. It's for burning through the night.

[Which isn't really the most accurate interpretation, but it works well for him and it's not as if he's actually religious. For the purpose of this, it doesn't matter.]

I got your gifts. Good book.

[He's a fast reader and it hasn't been difficult to know who'd gift him something like that. It's not why he's gotten them a present, he's planned on that anyway.]

Usually I don't celebrate, but...

[He moves his hand in a gesture that might say a lot or nothing.]

Might at well.
catchacold: :) (Default)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-01 08:48 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah. I felt like I'd always done that, back on that island. When we were Lost Ones? Apparently took to it. I remembered your song.

[He looks at the flute critically, too much of a perfectionist to really overlook the many flaws with it. He's good with his hands and this might not be the most complicated thing to make out of wood, but he's not exactly a professional by any means and it shows.]

Sounds better than it looks.
catchacold: :( (walls breaking)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-01 09:08 am (UTC)(link)
[He's heard the laugh and it's mirrored in a smile of his own that is gone at least as quickly. Neither of them are that quick to smile, much less laugh, especially in a genuine way.

And neither of them is likely to hold out a hand, to hug. It's not really how they do things, but he knows, feels that he has to do something else.]


[What now? He pats himself down with one hand, at more of a loss than he feels comfortable with.]

Do you want gum?
catchacold: bay window :( (don't have feelings)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-02 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
[He hands the gum over, taking a strip into his mouth himself and chewing as he listens to their words.]

Yeah. Yeah, it was a mistake.

[He knows that, he was there. That just, in his eyes, doesn't make it better. If anything, it makes it worse.]

If anyone had to kill you to turn this around for you, I'm fine with it having been me. I don't have that much of a conscience. I know when things are needed. [It's not something he'd be proud of, but still.] But I didn't decide to do that. I messed up. That's on me. Ain't nothing gonna make that all right.
Edited (mustn't forget the gum) 2017-01-02 05:06 (UTC)
catchacold: :) (Default)

[personal profile] catchacold 2017-01-02 05:21 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, you see, kid? That just makes this more messed up, not less.

[What can he even say?

The bottom line is that his guilt - all there is of it - is his to deal with and the last thing that Frisk needs is to worry about that on top of everything they're dealing with. So he pulls both of his legs up to his chest, wrapping one arm around them and keeping the other closer to his chest.]

Think you gonna need to be stuck in here much longer?

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