[ Her modest room is now a vast warehouse. She's done it a few times now; forced herself to live through it, to experience that terror again and again. Chloe knows how it ends; with her killing a man, parting with Lucifer, and taking her daughter home. She wishes instead for the memory of curling into Trixie's bed, holding her daughter close to her until her breathing evens, her tiny snores and child-like mumbles calming Chloe's frayed nerves with every small breath.
The warehouse is colder than she remembers. Her face aches from holding back her tears as she clutches Trixie close to her, tells her to hide. Every time Graham points the gun at her, that same fear rises again inside of her, mixed with an odd sort of peace as the knowledge sinks in that she's going to die. Then Lucifer appears and the cold air burns her lungs as she runs, the horror rising again inside of her as she watches Lucifer fall, watches him bleed.
She tries to stop it, eventually. Tries to rewrite the memory; she tries to run away, tries to find Trixie faster, tries to come to Lucifer's aid, but none of it can be changed. It ends the same way each time, with Lucifer rising again and her killing the man who nearly killed her.
It doesn't make her feel better. It doesn't calm her in the least with the knowledge of the pain Lucifer experienced, of the nightmares Trixie had for weeks after, or the way she couldn't get the sound of her own panicked heartbeat out of her head. She can't save any of them from that trauma, and her punishment is to relive it again and again.
Yet she stays for hours, to prove to herself she can survive the pain, and to steal away that fleeting moment of having her daughter in her arms again. ]
[ 6th FLOOR; HALLWAY ]
[ She doesn't choose Lucifer's floor by accident.
Chloe can't stay on her own anymore, not with knowing what continues behind her door. She's not just frustrated by what is happening, but by the fact it seems to blow her theory out of the water. She was sure that Wonderland wasn't creating the events based on their memories, that the cross-contamination the Cheshire Cat told her about meant something completely different. But this wasn't a normal event; it was obviously based on all of their memories, their worst memories, the ones that hurt the most. It is too personal, and it doesn't make any sense.
She knows she should have never trusted that damn cat.
After managing to gather a collection of blankets and pillows, Chloe finds a corner and makes a plush nest. A blanket wrapped around her shoulders, just doors down from where Lux used to be. Although she isn't living the memory anymore, it isn't far from her mind.
Chloe isn't sure she can even go back to her room once this is over, knowing how easily Wonderland turned it against her. ]
chloe decker | ota | 8th floor, room 007 & 6th floor, hallway
[ 8th FLOOR; ROOM 007 ]
[ Her modest room is now a vast warehouse. She's done it a few times now; forced herself to live through it, to experience that terror again and again. Chloe knows how it ends; with her killing a man, parting with Lucifer, and taking her daughter home. She wishes instead for the memory of curling into Trixie's bed, holding her daughter close to her until her breathing evens, her tiny snores and child-like mumbles calming Chloe's frayed nerves with every small breath.
It isn't that memory, though. It's worse. It's exactly what Alice promised; the worst day of her life. The day she almost lost everything.
The warehouse is colder than she remembers. Her face aches from holding back her tears as she clutches Trixie close to her, tells her to hide. Every time Graham points the gun at her, that same fear rises again inside of her, mixed with an odd sort of peace as the knowledge sinks in that she's going to die. Then Lucifer appears and the cold air burns her lungs as she runs, the horror rising again inside of her as she watches Lucifer fall, watches him bleed.
She tries to stop it, eventually. Tries to rewrite the memory; she tries to run away, tries to find Trixie faster, tries to come to Lucifer's aid, but none of it can be changed. It ends the same way each time, with Lucifer rising again and her killing the man who nearly killed her.
It doesn't make her feel better. It doesn't calm her in the least with the knowledge of the pain Lucifer experienced, of the nightmares Trixie had for weeks after, or the way she couldn't get the sound of her own panicked heartbeat out of her head. She can't save any of them from that trauma, and her punishment is to relive it again and again.
Yet she stays for hours, to prove to herself she can survive the pain, and to steal away that fleeting moment of having her daughter in her arms again. ]
[ 6th FLOOR; HALLWAY ]
[ She doesn't choose Lucifer's floor by accident.
Chloe can't stay on her own anymore, not with knowing what continues behind her door. She's not just frustrated by what is happening, but by the fact it seems to blow her theory out of the water. She was sure that Wonderland wasn't creating the events based on their memories, that the cross-contamination the Cheshire Cat told her about meant something completely different. But this wasn't a normal event; it was obviously based on all of their memories, their worst memories, the ones that hurt the most. It is too personal, and it doesn't make any sense.
She knows she should have never trusted that damn cat.
After managing to gather a collection of blankets and pillows, Chloe finds a corner and makes a plush nest. A blanket wrapped around her shoulders, just doors down from where Lux used to be. Although she isn't living the memory anymore, it isn't far from her mind.
Chloe isn't sure she can even go back to her room once this is over, knowing how easily Wonderland turned it against her. ]