[That's a poor excuse. Lapis herself, after all, has no trouble not singing about anyone's personal affairs. She knows by this point that it's an event, and heck, she too does come from a setting where people do spontaneous musical numbers anyway. Both of those contexts, though, also tell her that songs are honest and earnest, and that they... they stem from something important. She's good at reading the underlying meaning to things, even if she brushes off the details.
Lapis can't believe Peridot is doing this. Just -- dragging these things about her out into the open, making a whole silly show of it, like it's not something to be careful of or even take seriously. Here, now, when Lapis herself is caught up in the actual harsh reality they're dealing with, this, of all things, is what Peridot is up to. It could almost hurt, except...
Lapis can believe it all too easily, actually. She knows perfectly well that Peridot is nosy and silly and shallow. She knows Peridot treats her as a project, the way a small child playing pretend might. And sure she's fun to have around when nothing actually important is going on, but when it comes down to it she never really does any good, no more than anyone else can. The truth is that if Peridot ever did manage to make her feel like she wasn't alone, it was a pleasant illusion at best. And really, she always knew that, didn't she?
Lapis can't believe she would ever care about it. Who even told Peridot she gets to have an opinion? No, when it comes down to it it's none of her business. Lapis is nobody's business but Lapis. She doesn't need any of this nonsense.
It doesn't matter. None of it matters. Nothing either of them can do is going to matter, but at least Lapis has the decency to realize it. She's so tired. She's so tired of acting like anything has ever been okay. It's like lead in the limbs and nonexistent veins of her projection, it's like her vision dimming, it's like static pounding in her ears.
She glares at Peridot and through her, or past her, like she's trying to see her and can't. Her voice comes out vehement but uneven, sharp-edged, with the tone of a soundbyte being played in a slightly unfitting situation, and that really isn't something that should be conveyable through tone.]
Whatever you're doing, just stop. This isn't going to work.
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Lapis can't believe Peridot is doing this. Just -- dragging these things about her out into the open, making a whole silly show of it, like it's not something to be careful of or even take seriously. Here, now, when Lapis herself is caught up in the actual harsh reality they're dealing with, this, of all things, is what Peridot is up to. It could almost hurt, except...
Lapis can believe it all too easily, actually. She knows perfectly well that Peridot is nosy and silly and shallow. She knows Peridot treats her as a project, the way a small child playing pretend might. And sure she's fun to have around when nothing actually important is going on, but when it comes down to it she never really does any good, no more than anyone else can. The truth is that if Peridot ever did manage to make her feel like she wasn't alone, it was a pleasant illusion at best. And really, she always knew that, didn't she?
Lapis can't believe she would ever care about it. Who even told Peridot she gets to have an opinion? No, when it comes down to it it's none of her business. Lapis is nobody's business but Lapis. She doesn't need any of this nonsense.
It doesn't matter. None of it matters. Nothing either of them can do is going to matter, but at least Lapis has the decency to realize it. She's so tired. She's so tired of acting like anything has ever been okay. It's like lead in the limbs and nonexistent veins of her projection, it's like her vision dimming, it's like static pounding in her ears.
She glares at Peridot and through her, or past her, like she's trying to see her and can't. Her voice comes out vehement but uneven, sharp-edged, with the tone of a soundbyte being played in a slightly unfitting situation, and that really isn't something that should be conveyable through tone.]
Whatever you're doing, just stop. This isn't going to work.