Even now, Dean cares too much. More than he should. More than it should matter, and he shoves it down. He stomps on it and trods on it and lets it build that fire burning in his gut, that urge to just end it all, everything, all of it. He needs to find Michael. Michael can take him to the future, right? Michael's got the power to jump to a point in time just before that fucker ate the vorpal shield, and maybe they can end it there, before the core mission. Maybe. Maybe.

If nothing else, they can strategize. Michael was heaven's deadliest warrior, and that's what he needs. With enough time and planning, a deadly warrior can turn the tide of a war.

Castiel's presence at his side is unsettling, but he can't pull away until he finds that journal. As soon as his hands wrap around it, he rips it out and rifles through pages in such a frantic hurry that he actually manages to rip one or two of them.

He ignores Castiel's questions again as he reads, fixates his mind on the point in time, tries to remember the details surrounding those months. The resistance fort is already built. Good. Christmas, his very first Christmas in Wonderland. The year before him and Cas....

He jerks his head up again, tosses the journal down onto the dresser.

Seems to debate on whether or not he's going to answer at all. Finally, annoyed with himself, he does. "No. I don't know."

A beat, and his eyes flick down to Castiel's hands. He holds his own out. "I need to make a call."

He wiggles his fingers impatiently. Give him the communicator.