He forces himself to look away from Martha and focus on Amy's face, because if he looks at her for even one more minute, he knows he won't be able to control in the anger that's threatening to spill over. There's no one to direct it towards, not right now, and he'd rather not have Amy get caught up in that mess.

"Do you know, Amy, what I'm thinking right now?" It's an odd question; of course she doesn't. She's never traveled with him, never even met him before today. But he feels like, maybe, if this weren't Wonderland, if they weren't trapped, he'd offer to take her along with him. Don't ask him why he feels that way, but there is something about her that makes him think she'd be a great person to have along.

"I'm thinking about her mother and how terribly angry she'd be with me for allowing this to happen." Martha's mother never seemed to like him that much anyway, and if she knew about this (thankfully the chances of that are slim), she'd most likely have his head on a platter. "It doesn't matter that I can't be everywhere. I should have been here, and I wasn't."

And yes, he is blaming himself, even though he knows Martha would hate him for it. She'd probably slap him for it, too, but he can't help it.

He did fail her, and he failed her family. But, in the midst of all his blaming, one thing registers in his mind. Those who are still alive and not hurt need to be protected, and that is something he can try to do.

"You are right about one thing, though. There are still things that I can do here, even if I can't do them for Martha."