He doesn't tell Kevin that the thing haunting him the most isn't what he's done to the boy he thought was his son. There are so many others that he's known so much deeper, so much more intimately -- others that he'd betrayed because he thought he was doing the right thing.

Even in this life, he'd managed to screw up enough to make some of his brothers ashamed of him. He was sure Castiel tolerated him for easy rent, now, and when Kevin looks at him he can't meet the boy's eyes.

He ordered Daniel's favorite drink, though, Kevin. Go ahead and see if it tastes different, now.

"I do not know," he says honestly, raking a hand through his hair. He finally makes eye contact with Kevin, speaking firmly. "I know that I feel sick when I think of what I did. Maybe -- what I will do? -- but that I was less restless, in the end."