[Ah, awkward first love. Fortunately for Alistair, she's managed to navigate this incredibly horrible obstacle in her life already -- more or less.
She doesn't know if she considers Hank the first person she loved, because that was a pathetic little crush brought on by him being one of the first people other than Charles to ever show her positive attention -- and he'd also told her she'd never be beautiful, looking the way that she was.
He'd saved her life since then from one of the only other men she'd ever been romantically involved with trying to kill her, so she also understood that romance could be -- complicated. She purses her lips, thoughtful, and turns so their knees are touching and she can look him in the eye a little better.]
There's a lot of things that we can't control. Here and at home -- in my world, at least. The only things we can control are how we feel, and how we let that make us act.
I can't tell you how to feel, Alistair, but...
[She reaches her hand out to rest against his leg. Hopefully he doesn't pull away.]
I can tell you that for me, missing out on something because I was afraid of what would happen is a lot scarier than the idea of being hurt by this place.
[She knows it's her silly, somewhat impulsive nature that keeps her feeling like that. She also knows what it's like to want something to last forever while knowing in the back of her mind it's nearly impossible for it to do so, but she can't make his decision for him.]
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She doesn't know if she considers Hank the first person she loved, because that was a pathetic little crush brought on by him being one of the first people other than Charles to ever show her positive attention -- and he'd also told her she'd never be beautiful, looking the way that she was.
He'd saved her life since then from one of the only other men she'd ever been romantically involved with trying to kill her, so she also understood that romance could be -- complicated. She purses her lips, thoughtful, and turns so their knees are touching and she can look him in the eye a little better.]
There's a lot of things that we can't control. Here and at home -- in my world, at least. The only things we can control are how we feel, and how we let that make us act.
I can't tell you how to feel, Alistair, but...
[She reaches her hand out to rest against his leg. Hopefully he doesn't pull away.]
I can tell you that for me, missing out on something because I was afraid of what would happen is a lot scarier than the idea of being hurt by this place.
[She knows it's her silly, somewhat impulsive nature that keeps her feeling like that. She also knows what it's like to want something to last forever while knowing in the back of her mind it's nearly impossible for it to do so, but she can't make his decision for him.]