entrancelogs | it's hard to lose a chosen one [open]

Entry tags:

it's hard to lose a chosen one [open]

Who: Frisk (+ potential bonus Chara) and YOU!
Where: In your room. Yes, your room.
When: August 21st - August 23rd
Rating: PG? PG-13? these threads always end up bouncing all over the place. Will adjust if needed.
Summary: There's a small child in your room. Maybe they're going through your personal effects without any regards for privacy. Look, this is perfectly socially acceptable behavior in an RPG, all right?
The Story:

The past few days have been a gross unbalancing of their equilibrium, and Frisk has made the unilateral decision that they need something to help them reach that sense of stability again. Too much time has been spent lying on the floor of their room, sometimes with Chara, sometimes alone, enjoying the nonexistent fruits of Napstablook's patented "Lying On The Floor And Feeling Like Garbage" coping technique.

Eventually, they get to their feet. And then they begin to wander.

They try random doors along every hallway. Step inside the room if the door should be unlocked - or they may recruit their partner to open the door if they so choose (Do you want to see how many rooms we can break into? Frisk may or may not have asked while they lay on the floor and contemplated the ceiling paint job. And, Sure, Chara may or may not have answered, because it meant doing something other than simply feeling like useless trash for days on end.)

The point is, there's a kid in your room now. There might even be two. They're going through your stuff, looking through desk drawers, reading diaries, opening dressers, checking under beds. It's not like this sort of behavior was ever really criticized back in the Underground. People had no problem with them walking into their rooms and taking their sweet time poking around.

So, you know, don't even worry about it.

[ooc: feel free to specify the date you'd like this child to enter your room and whether or not you'd like the Frisk-Chara bonus combo! PM me here, message me on AIM at arcaneswearwords or contact me at

arrpee if you want to discuss what Frisk may find if you want them to go through your character's private belongings - they won't discover anything you don't want them to!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Coming back from the diner, Souji was not expecting to see a Frisk (and possibly a Chara) in his room. Not alarmed at all, but more bemused than anything. He glances around for Tethra, the small, fat gray dragon that lives in his room. She isn't at all dangerous, though she sometimes gnaws on shoes.

"Do you need something?"

He's willing to help out with that, whatever it is, though he'd also like some explanation for their presence, if there is one.

Frisk showed up in this room alone, at least, diverging from their breaking-and-entering duo routine to try jimmying a few locks themselves.

They don't expect to walk in on a dragon, and their mouth drops open for a solid minute until someone apparently spots them.

Frisk whips around guiltily, but they don't manage much aside from an astonished squeak of, "you have a dragon?"

Souji comes fully into the room, though he doesn't close the door quite all the way. That might come off as intimidating, though he things he and Frisk are well enough acquainted that it probably wouldn't be a problem.

Nodding in response, he takes his shoes off--a habit from home. "She was a gift. Someone who's not here anymore gave her to me."

He toes his shoes aside and goes over to stroke the dragon's head. She flattens her much-too-small-for-her-girth wings out to either side and makes a pleased sounds that's somewhere between a purr and a chirp.

"Her name is Tefra. You can pet her if you want."

Their eyes dart to the exit habitually, a reflex they can't fully prevent, just like the reflex that has them scanning the room for things that they can throw between themselves and a potential threat, things that could be brandished as a weapon. Toy Knife. Empty Gun. Ballet Shoes. Burnt Pan. Sometimes more unlikely items - fire poker, telephone, a plastic tupperware container once.

They've been caught. This isn't good, even if Souji's someone they've come to think of as a friend.

"You're not...mad," they say slowly, skeptically

He takes in their nervous manner and straightens up, despite the dragon's disgruntled snort when he stops petting her. She grumbles off to lay on his folded up futon while Souji watches Frisk. He doesn't get any closer.

"Do you want me to be?"

"I..."

No. Of course not. No one wants someone to be mad at them, right? Yeah. That'd be ridiculous. That'd be just - way out of line, right?

Yeah.

"No," Frisk blurts, too quickly, straightening up with their hands behind their back as if they have something to hide - which they don't, and they don't know why they did that. Reflex, perhaps? "No. I just - thought you would be. Maybe."

"If you thought that, why'd you come in?"

Souji keeps any hint of accusation out of his question. He wants to know the honest answer, but more than that, he wants to get to the bottom of this behavior. It comes of being very curious and ~~nosy~~ concerned about others.

He goes to sit on the floor in front of his small couch, his back against the front edges of the cushions. Now he's not between Frisk and the door--if they stay, it's their choice. It seems like they might want that kind of choice right now, though Souji will be decidedly worried rather than simply bemused if they do go so suddenly.

Again, their eyes dart to the door, purely out of instinct. Not so difficult to slip out, if they wanted it. But that kind of thing would be..."weird". It'd be bad, and it'd end with questions that they don't feel like answering or can't answer at all.

"I didn't think you'd come back so soon," they say, a little bolder, lifting their chin somewhat.

Souji nods. That had seemed clear. They weren't looking for him in particular, or they'd have come to the diner when they saw he wasn't in the room. They weren't looking for anything in particular, either, from what he can tell--they hadn't known about Tefra, so they probably didn't know what else was in his room. Anything else they wanted could have been obtained from the vendors or the closets.

"What are you up to?"

That's more blunt than he'd have liked to be, but his tone is only one of curiosity. If he's concerned--which he is--his voice and expression don't give that away. There's certainly no suspicion or irritation in either.

"I was exploring," they say, with the same defiant undertone to the words. But they have no right, don't they? People Underground didn't care if they did the same thing, though. Maybe humans just care a lot more than monsters do.

"I...this is normal back home," they add, slightly less assertive, glancing away as they find they can no longer meet his eyes.

That makes Souji relax somewhat. So it might not be that anything's wrong--it's just acting on what they're used to.

"I guess I can't complain about that."

He never wandered into other peoples' rooms, but he certainly had a habit of inserting himself into their lives. If it wouldn't have been completely unacceptable where he was from, he'd likely be doing what Frisk is now.

"Were you bored?"

He can't complain? Well, he certainly doesn't seem mad, though...they're not sure why they were expecting him to be. They've never seen Souji angry even once, they think.

Doesn't mean he shouldn't be. Right? Do they want him to be angry? They...don't really know.

"I guess," Frisk concedes with a shrug. "Chara and I were just...they wanted a distraction. And I guess I wanted one too."

"From what?"

He admittedly hasn't been keeping up with Chara and Frisk lately--maybe it's something lingering from a recent event? Or maybe it really is just boredom. Wonderland gets monotonous after awhile, even with the events to break it up. That's probably why he's gotten so invested in the diner. It's like having a job, which is monotonous too, but in a much more normal way than being stuck in a magical other-world is.

"A friend of ours disappeared," they admit after a moment of dithering, nearly silent as they debate the merits of confessing it to him outright. In the end, they suppose it doesn't matter. They already admitted it to the network at large. And word seems to spread awfully quick in the mansion, with how everyone seems to know each other.

"It's been - hard, since then."

Souji nods slowly. He probably should know who that is, but after the first couple years of his stay, he stopped trying to keep track, even when it was a friend of a friend. He's not really happy with that change in himself, but it is what it is.

"I know how that is." There have been half a dozen people from his world here at one time or another, some of them more than once.

"Were you close to them?"

"Not...not really." They wince as they say it. They knew him for maybe ten minutes back home, and most of that time involved him attempting to rip their SOUL from their body. And then here, they'd...well, they'd kept their distance too. But they're still, what? The friend he always wished he had? Someone perfect and kind who could do no wrong?

"I mean, we were friends," they hasten to clarify, "but we didn't really know each other well. It was...complicated."

Souji nods again. It had been like that with Adachi. They were connected in a way he couldn't describe, but they weren't exactly friends. Adachi would definitely have scoffed at the idea, if Souji ever suggested it. Still, when Adachi had left Wonderland, it was a strange, difficult thing to deal with, in a very different way than it was to deal with Yousuke or any of the others leaving.

"Will you see them when you go back?"

It's a polite way of asking if that person is dead--or if Frisk is, though he's never gotten that impression.

"No."

Their expression twists briefly, a pained, angry smile that slides away as quickly as it appears. That's assuming they can remember that they're not supposed to - they might end up doing just that anyway, huh? No way to remember it. No way to hold these things in their mind forever once they leave Wonderland.

"Back home, he's..." A shade of his former self, a flower given sentience? An empty shell? Someone who died before his time?

"He's gone," says Frisk, dully, and leaves it at that.

Souji is silent for a moment, since that seems to warrant silence.

"I'm sorry."

Nothing he says can undo whatever the situation is, and he's not particularly sorry for asking, but he is sorry that Frisk is unhappy.

"You seem lost."

"Literally, or...?" They open a hand vaguely as they shrug. They probably look lost too. Not just in the literal sense, because they're standing in the middle of someone else's room with a dragon in the corner and an improbable list of excuses as to why they're even here.

But they suppose they feel pretty lost too. In the wake of losing someone, they suppose such is to be...anticipated. Except they've only done this once before, and they don't want to get any better at it.

"No, not literally."

He's still not very worried about the literal part of Frisk wandering in. He's not even sure they knew this was his room before he showed up, so "lost" might be a good word to describe how they got here.

Without elaborating, he waits for their response. He doesn't really want to pressure them, but...well, maybe talking a little bit will help them.

...ah. Yeah. Well, they must seem pretty lost, huh? Pretty empty and upset and utterly at sea. And they are, a little bit. Don't really know how to deal with it. Don't know how to do anything but lock it down and hope it doesn't come bubbling back up.

(But it does. It always does.)

"I guess I...I'm learning that I...don't really know how to, how to lose people." They try to laugh, to lighten the mood maybe, but it comes out staggered and forced. "I only know how to push them away before I really lose them. And it's - it's harder than I would've..."

Well. It's hard.

"I know." Souji's voice is= gentler than normal. "When you don't have anyone, and then suddenly you do...it's frightening."

Not just the thought of losing them, but the thought of getting close at all because of the seeming inevitability of losing them.

"Yeah." They breathe out, shuddering and slow. "Yeah. I...I'm usually the one that changes things, back home. I'm the only one that really makes those changes happen. So when it happens here I don't - I don't know how to - "

How to handle it.

How to process it.

How to live with it.

That seems to be where Souji's experience diverge's from Frisk's. Though there were many things he chose, he did so as part of his team. Whether he was the leader or not, everyone had a part in driving their direction. The only thing he'd chosen himself was to rise up after Izanami "killed" him; even then, it had been because of the links he had with all of the people he knew in Inaba.

"Would it be better if you had no say in anything? If everything just happened to you instead?"

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