[ota] It leaves us with regrets and picks apart the threads

[shorthair]

Who: Clementine + you
Where: Mansion
When: April 5 - 12. Plus, all of April and May
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Clementine returns from her canon update. Feel free to reply to the network post here since I won't actually spam the network community too. Action spam or prose is totally cool with me.
The Story: First week and a half

It's warm.

She's felt like she was freezing since she fell into the lake of ice. Was that really just yesterday? It's warm here. Her hands press to grass, and she stares at the ground, shuddering because she thinks the frozen water might have seeped into her blood. She knows it's warm but she still feels cold.

She's back in Wonderland. A rush of memories, of emotion hits her. There are so many people she cares about here, and she hasn't seen them since she left, and it feels like she's been gone for years instead of- days. Weeks? Time is funny.

AJ isn't in her arms anymore. It's just him and her now. Seems right. She can't trust people anymore.

Now that the adrenaline has faded away, the bullet wound in her shoulder hurts like fucking hell. She killed someone else she cared about. Again. Does she even belong in this place with people who are good, who do what's right? If they knew, what the fuck would they think of her. She feels like she might be sick, but there's nothing in her stomach to puke anyway so it's just her insides twisting around like knots.

She pulls her network device out, texting a quick open network post, because she won't remember everyone she'll want to text to let them know:

It's Clementine. I'm back. In my room.

If anyone is up at night, they might run into her, a child with blood on the shoulder of her jacket with a very clear hole through it. No gun for once. She left it with the last dead body she's left behind her.

When she finally makes it into her room. She writes the names of more dead people on the wall (Sarita, Sarah, Luke, Rebecca, Kenny). She pulls out blankets from the closet and piles them on the bed and puts herself underneath them, but it doesn't help with the cold. She tries to get out of the damn jacket, but she hisses out pain and stops midway. She stays there for a week and a half without leaving.

Rest of April/May

Eventually, later in the month, she finally leaves her room again. She's got the small shot gun from Christmas with her, holstered to her back.

She's in the cafeteria in short sleeves, which means she's revealing a certain scar for the first time since she came to Wonderland. Sometimes she's reading books about taking care of babies as if osmosis will happen if when she's sent back. Somewhere in between reading how often they have to feed and sleep, she tosses the book away from her so hard that it almost hits somebody.

Then she picks up baking. She used to with her mother all the time, and if she can kill people and survive walkers and gun shots and ice lakes, she can make some cookies if the recipes right there, right? Maybe.

She ends up making a big mess in the kitchen as she tries to spoon big chunks of cookie dough out on to pans, smirking at her giant mess. It's kind of hilarious she can survive so much and fight so hard and then get defeated by cookie dough.

Comments

[krmvgivv]

You move around a lot? [It's a common trope in zombie fiction. Wandering bands of survivors, going to where the looting's best.]

[shorthair]

Yeah. Have to. To find food, to escape hordes. There was one time we stayed somewhere for a little while. My first group, but- It wasn't safe. Raiders put pressure on us. We never had enough food to feed everyone.

[ Also, there were cannibals trying to invite them over who literally took one of their injured, and then- well. the whole group was invited over for dinner. ]

[krmvgivv]

[Dipper's time surviving an apocalypse was only three days, but he remembers how hard finding food was. He nods.]

Do you, like, hunt or are there grocery stores and stuff to loot?

[shorthair]

Both. You can scavenge, but it's been years since it all started. Most of the grocery stores are picked clean.

[ She's sort of malnourished and hungry most of the time. ] Hard to find animals to hunt too. I've heard about people trying to make a place too, but it- I don't know. It never lasts.

[krmvgivv]

It must be really hard. [The fact that they've survived long enough for grocery stores to be picked clean is good, but on the other hand, it just must keep getting harder.] Wow, Wonderland must be so much better in a lot of ways.

[shorthair]

Yeah. Lots of food, shelter, a bed and stuff of my own. The people aren't assholes who'd rather shoot first and ask questions later too. [ She manages a smirk and a heavy shrug of her shoulders. ] I mean, mostly. There are assholes here too.

[ The situations just less desperate. So everything's not on edge all the time. It's exhausting, and it's a pain in the ass. ]

[krmvgivv]

There are assholes everywhere. [If there's one constant of the universe, it's that some people are jerks. Often even people who you like. Or yourself.] But yeah, they're a lot less likely to shoot you here. Or if they do, it's not as big a deal since you come back.

[shorthair]

The one thing that connects all universes. Assholes. [ Clementine grimaces a bit and then shakes her head, glancing at him. ] ...have you ever like... come back here?

[krmvgivv]

Like... left and then come back? [Dipper nods.] Twice. Mabel was with me both times. She left once without me too. And... didn't remember anything when she returned.

[shorthair]

That must have been hard, but I'm glad she came back. [ she rests her back against the wall, turning away from it so she doesn't have to look at the names anymore. ] It had to be a lot harder that she left while you were still here.

[krmvgivv]

It was awful. [He tugs his knees up, wrapping his arms around them.] I didn't know if she'd even come back.

[shorthair]

[ she walks over to him and rests her hand on his arm, squeezing it gently. it's clearly a hard memory, and given they're in wonderland without a choice or a chance, it can happen again without warning. ] I'm glad she did come back.

[krmvgivv]

Me too. [It had been a pretty terrible week. He'd said his first swear word that week, though he's not about to tell Clementine that. She swears all the time like it's no big deal. He'd almost made a deal with Bill, too, even though he knew exactly how terrible an idea that was.

He turns to look at her.]

But that was two years ago, and she's only ever left at the same time as me since. So that's been better.

[shorthair]

[ Clementine takes his hand in her own and then nods as she swallows thickly. There's no way to stay in Wonderland if Wonderland wants someone to go. Maybe it learned better than to separate Dipper and his sister. ]

Good. Sounds like Wonderland got its shit together when it came to that at least. [ Her chest aches as she swallows thickly. ] We don't really have... any control over it.

[krmvgivv]

No. That's the scariest part. [Even for the people who want to stay, there's never any guarantee of how long they'll be there or if their loved ones would stay with them. Wonderland could leave Dipper or Mabel alone, and he can't let that happen.]