shorthair: and picks apart the threads (it leaves us with regrets)
Clementine ([personal profile] shorthair) wrote in [community profile] entrancelogs2017-04-05 01:02 pm

[ota] It leaves us with regrets and picks apart the threads

Who: Clementine + you
Where: Mansion
When: April 5 - 12. Plus, all of April and May
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Clementine returns from her canon update. Feel free to reply to the network post here since I won't actually spam the network community too. Action spam or prose is totally cool with me.
The Story: First week and a half

It's warm.

She's felt like she was freezing since she fell into the lake of ice. Was that really just yesterday? It's warm here. Her hands press to grass, and she stares at the ground, shuddering because she thinks the frozen water might have seeped into her blood. She knows it's warm but she still feels cold.

She's back in Wonderland. A rush of memories, of emotion hits her. There are so many people she cares about here, and she hasn't seen them since she left, and it feels like she's been gone for years instead of- days. Weeks? Time is funny.

AJ isn't in her arms anymore. It's just him and her now. Seems right. She can't trust people anymore.

Now that the adrenaline has faded away, the bullet wound in her shoulder hurts like fucking hell. She killed someone else she cared about. Again. Does she even belong in this place with people who are good, who do what's right? If they knew, what the fuck would they think of her. She feels like she might be sick, but there's nothing in her stomach to puke anyway so it's just her insides twisting around like knots.

She pulls her network device out, texting a quick open network post, because she won't remember everyone she'll want to text to let them know:

It's Clementine. I'm back. In my room.

If anyone is up at night, they might run into her, a child with blood on the shoulder of her jacket with a very clear hole through it. No gun for once. She left it with the last dead body she's left behind her.

When she finally makes it into her room. She writes the names of more dead people on the wall (Sarita, Sarah, Luke, Rebecca, Kenny). She pulls out blankets from the closet and piles them on the bed and puts herself underneath them, but it doesn't help with the cold. She tries to get out of the damn jacket, but she hisses out pain and stops midway. She stays there for a week and a half without leaving.

Rest of April/May

Eventually, later in the month, she finally leaves her room again. She's got the small shot gun from Christmas with her, holstered to her back.

She's in the cafeteria in short sleeves, which means she's revealing a certain scar for the first time since she came to Wonderland. Sometimes she's reading books about taking care of babies as if osmosis will happen if when she's sent back. Somewhere in between reading how often they have to feed and sleep, she tosses the book away from her so hard that it almost hits somebody.

Then she picks up baking. She used to with her mother all the time, and if she can kill people and survive walkers and gun shots and ice lakes, she can make some cookies if the recipes right there, right? Maybe.

She ends up making a big mess in the kitchen as she tries to spoon big chunks of cookie dough out on to pans, smirking at her giant mess. It's kind of hilarious she can survive so much and fight so hard and then get defeated by cookie dough.
thesamurai: (💀 11)

[personal profile] thesamurai 2017-04-22 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
All I want you to know, is that if I'm out there, other people are too. There's still good, Clem. We found an entire community we didn't even know was out there.

[ Michonne isn't sure where this hope speech is coming from other than some desperate attempt for Clementine to not wind up like she was before finding the prison. Michonne had thought it was better. It wasn't. What she has no maybe was luck, or maybe it was not being too far gone.

But then Clementine says there's a baby, that she's trying to take care of a baby, and she shakes her head a little, dragging a hand down her face. ]


Just you and AJ.

[ Fuck. ]
thesamurai: (💀 54)

[personal profile] thesamurai 2017-04-26 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
[ This isn't fair. Not in the slightest. And hell, nothing about their lives are fair anymore but this takes the shitty cake. A child saddled with an infant. Now, more than ever, Michonne wishes she could just fucking remember. ]

It's hard. Because people keep fucking you over. Then you start to care, and something fucks them over and you're alone again.

[ She knows. She knows it. ]

My son. I lost him and I was done. I walked away from groups, told people I didn't need them. Then I found one person about to die in the woods. A walker was on her, I saved her. And I didn't walk away. Don't know why I didn't that time. But I let her stay with me. We got through winter together. Almost a year.

[ Michonne pauses and looks at Clementine. ]

It was Andrea.
thesamurai: (💀 68)

[personal profile] thesamurai 2017-04-29 04:00 pm (UTC)(link)
She was. She is. But if I'd given up completely on people, never would have happened.

[ So much happened between that meeting and now, and she lets out a breath. ]

After she...when she died, I went off alone again. Everyone, all our people were scattered. I thought it was better. I just lost an entire group, in the blink of an eye. Didn't want to go through it again.

[ Slowly, she shakes her head. ]

Then I realized I was just a walker. Drifting with the heard. And what separates us from them, is humanity.
thesamurai: (💀 71)

[personal profile] thesamurai 2017-04-30 01:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I know. I know it.

[ Maybe it wasn't fair to keep saying it here when it would be impossible for Clementine to hear it there. A dick move, maybe, to try and tell her not to shut down when there's no reason not to as far as she can see. But there's a part of her that hopes, maybe on some deep, deep subconscious level, Clementine will hear someone's voice telling her to keep some kind of hope burning. ]

No matter what, I think you're gonna be okay. You're strong. You're a fighter.
thesamurai: (💀 78)

/sobs fade?

[personal profile] thesamurai 2017-05-02 06:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Always will. And you can come to me anytime you need to, too.

[ Her cheek rests on top of Clementine's head, and she'll hold her for as long as needed. ]