It's... a lot of things.

[But all of it comes to his mirror. It all comes to his mirror and trying to be more detached like him.

He leaves it at that, vague and in the air. He can't tell Bucky. He already tried once to get it out of him and he can't let him get so close again.]

Yes... there are some aspects of Wonderland that are appealing... there are people here that I wouldn't know back home and would dearly miss.

[It's a roundabout way of saying he'd miss Bucky if he was gone, but it's the only way he can say it without breaking more of his "rules."]

I'm glad you're trying. You need more friends. More friendly people who see you and care about you. You deserve that.