entrancelogs | It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you!

Who: EVERYONE!
Where: EVERYWHERE!
When: Friday October 27th - Tuesday October 31st
Rating: PG-13, warn if you're gonna go higher!
Summary: A catch all for the Horrible Memory Truth Event!
The Story:

For the duration of this event, everyone's entire room will be replaced with a memory playing on loop. They will likely recognize the moment as soon as they see it – it is a moment they remember as the worst moment of their entire lives. It could be a memory from home or something that happened in Wonderland. Lengths of the memories will vary, but they will find that these are not memories they can merely watch – they can step into these memories and attempt to make changes to them, and the memories will be long enough that they have time to make changes (though no more than 24 hours). However, anyone who tries will find that it is futile. No matter what you do or how hard you try, the outcome is always exactly the same somehow. No changes you make will prevent that horrible outcome. It just happens over and over and over again no matter what you do.

On top of that, perhaps complicating any attempts to make changes, everyone will be forced to be honest for the duration of the event. No lies or half-truths are allowed, and filters will be gone for the entire five days. If something bothers someone then they will blurt it out, regardless of whether or not it hurts someone's feelings, and no one will be able to simply keep quiet when they have something to say. They must be truthful and honest with every word they say.

This is a catch-all log for all of your Worst Memory needs! Please mark your threads clearly in the subject line with your character's name and Room Number + Floor for character rooms, or just location if you're making a top level for a public place in the mansion (like the tea rooms or the kitchen) so people can see if there's already a thread available. And here's the plot post if you need it!

Have fun!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Georgia has one coping mechanism that never fails her: throwing herself into work and ignoring her problems.

Of course, it works a lot better when the places she can usually find her various allies haven't turned into memory horror zones.]

Shepard? [She pushes open the door and immediately freezes, panic rising as she takes in what is clearly a hospital room. She swallows nervously and fights back the urge to throw up.]

This isn't the CDC, Georgia. [She's muttering, but speaking aloud helps sometimes. She can hear her own voice.] Chill out.

[She forces her eyes up so she can take in what's happening.

Oh.

She doesn't know who the man is. But she knows what losing someone you love looks like. Her expression crumples, sympathy fighting with the panic.]

...I can come back later.

[She feels the panic spike in her throat when she hears another voice, someone who shouldn't-- be here, well no one should be here, she doesn't even want to be here again-- and she tries to take a steadying breath only for the air in her to fail again at the sight of Thane. Shepard raises a hand to her face, wiping down the front, in the dream already looking more battered than normal from being fresh from the fight.]

Shit. I'm sorry you had to see this.

[She doesn't even realize this is honesty, at first, even if that's not quite how she would've said it.

Shepard takes a look back to Thane, where the memory has moved again, where he's lying there as Kolyat speaks again.]

... We should go.

Yes, we should.

[Awkward as it is, intruding on such a personal moment, she's well aware it must be worse for Shepard on many levels. Reliving her own trauma had been bad enough, and that hadn't involved losing anyone she loved. She knows that's worse.

She stands back, holding the door open for Shepard.]

[Truthfully, Shepard doesn't want to go. Even in watching him die, even in having to relive that moment- when it loops, at the start, she gets to feel the touch of his hand. The weak squeeze where their fingers connect, the last bit of life in him she can still remember. It's a sorry state she's in that even this is hope. That she'd relive this horrible place just to see him alive for a second one more time.

She takes one more look back towards Thane, and turns, making her way out. The small scrapes and dirt on her disappears when she emerges, and the memory version of her splits off, walking backwards, takes Thane's hand.

Shepard leans against the wall, back heavy, head titled up and eyes closed.]

Sorry. It's... you probably have questions.

I always have questions. But in this case, I think I get the general gist.

[She glances back at the door, then makes sure it's firmly closed.]

Someone you love, I assume? [She tilts her head, expression hard to read through her sunglasses, but there's a touch of sympathy there.]

[She's trying to focus on her breathing, mostly to stop herself from crying in front of... well, it wouldn't especially matter if it was Georgia. Could be anyone. She just hates looking like this, hates looking weak.

Despite herself, her voice wavers.]

Someone I did, yeah. He took a hit that should've been mine, but... he was sick anyway. He didn't have much time no matter what.

[Georgia spent her entire life thinking she'd end up losing Shaun. She never had to experience it, save Wonderland's meddling. She's still imagined it enough that her heart aches for Shepard.]

How long ago?

[...she's not great at expressing her sympathy.]

[Considering Shepard's usual mo is "bury these emotions and literally never speak of them", any kind of talking might actually help. It's something to focus on, at least, some facts and figures more than nebulous depression.]

Couple of months before I got here. But I've been here over a year and a half, so... about two years, I guess.

[She doesn't even remember what day it was clearly. After Tuchanka, before Thessia; probably somewhere near the start of the year. It's hard to say.]

He was here for... two days, last year. But it was before this. He didn't know.

[She nods, glancing down.]

Did you tell him?

[She sighs, heavy.]

He... knew, sort of. He had an illness. Terminal. I knew it when I met him.

[Another pause.]

Technically, it's what killed him, but he could've had more time if he didn't take a stabbing that should've been mine.

I don't know him. But if he loved you too, I doubt he regretted it.

[She doesn't really regret that it was her and not Shaun that died. But maybe she's just being selfish that way. Living alone would be a hell of a lot harder than dying.]

He doesn't have to. He's dead. But I do.

[Regret is only for the living. Guilt is only for those who survive.]

I have to carry that guilt. That I didn't do more. I could've-- I could've survived it. He couldn't. It was stupid.

Well, that's bullshit.

[She crosses her arms.] As someone who has died, I'm well aware that living with loss is harder. But I can tell you I'd have wanted Shaun to be happy, if he could. I'm sure your guy wouldn't want you to be wracked with guilt either.

[She's actually caught off guard by the severity in the tone, the sudden, sharp interruption.]

I... don't know what I expected you to say, but I guess it wasn't that.

[Shepard looks back down at her hands, trying to gather her thoughts but forcibly talking through them.]

So many people haven't known what to say to me. So it just... hasn't gotten said. I don't know if anyone knows how to deal with this. I sure as fuck don't.

It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you! | OPEN MINGLE

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