entrancelogs | It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you!

Entry tags:

It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you! | OPEN MINGLE

Who: EVERYONE!
Where: EVERYWHERE!
When: Friday October 27th - Tuesday October 31st
Rating: PG-13, warn if you're gonna go higher!
Summary: A catch all for the Horrible Memory Truth Event!
The Story:

For the duration of this event, everyone's entire room will be replaced with a memory playing on loop. They will likely recognize the moment as soon as they see it – it is a moment they remember as the worst moment of their entire lives. It could be a memory from home or something that happened in Wonderland. Lengths of the memories will vary, but they will find that these are not memories they can merely watch – they can step into these memories and attempt to make changes to them, and the memories will be long enough that they have time to make changes (though no more than 24 hours). However, anyone who tries will find that it is futile. No matter what you do or how hard you try, the outcome is always exactly the same somehow. No changes you make will prevent that horrible outcome. It just happens over and over and over again no matter what you do.

On top of that, perhaps complicating any attempts to make changes, everyone will be forced to be honest for the duration of the event. No lies or half-truths are allowed, and filters will be gone for the entire five days. If something bothers someone then they will blurt it out, regardless of whether or not it hurts someone's feelings, and no one will be able to simply keep quiet when they have something to say. They must be truthful and honest with every word they say.

This is a catch-all log for all of your Worst Memory needs! Please mark your threads clearly in the subject line with your character's name and Room Number + Floor for character rooms, or just location if you're making a top level for a public place in the mansion (like the tea rooms or the kitchen) so people can see if there's already a thread available. And here's the plot post if you need it!

Have fun!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Finally, Lup understands what all of the people who warned her about Wonderland's events finally meant.

Everything about this day was just awful, but Lup's natural curiosity is just the worst part of it all. She had to peek inside, to see what memory Lucretia was forced to relieve, and now she's here seeking the woman out, following a aching need to be near her.]

Thought I'd find you here. When looking for nerds, always check the library first. [Lup doesn't ask before dragging a chair next to Lucretia and plopping down backwards in it, straddling the chair so her arms and head could rest along the top of the backrest. For a brief moment, the elf is silent, just watching her friend, eyes drifting along the obvious stress in Lucretia's face, the way it makes her seem even more older than she already has become. Her fingers idly tap out a small beat against the wood of the chair, before she finally can't stand the quiet and blurts out:]

It was worse than I ever imagined. And I've imagined it a lot. [It's hard to tell what's forced honesty and what's just Lup. She's a candid woman for the most part, but what she'd walked into and viewed was such a intimate, personal memory of Lucretia's.]

[Lucretia doesn't move to stop her as she brings herself closer, leaning back in her chair so Lup could touch her if she wanted. She doesn't... really know where they stand, here. Of course she hurried to Lup's room when everything happened, viewed the consequences Lup had to live with because of her destruction, and of course she's been here having a grand time with the power of avoidance ever since. She doesn't even know if Lup would want to see her. She doesn't know how to keep those boundaries.

But Lup speaks, and she responds, because suddenly she knows exactly where they are.]

I don't... know how I ever would have explained it as I experienced it. That was just the final battle. When I figured out what's going on, I thought...

[She pauses, only to collect what she's about to say, feeling Wonderland pushing it out of her where she'd like to fade instead.]

Earlier in that cycle, I tried to negotiate with them. I made it all the way to the capital and I-- I saw your bodies. All of you, statues.

I thought I would see that again. I suppose it's complicated to quantify suffering, though this place seems to manage.

[The invitation is laid out there there, so touch her Lup does, calloused fingertips slipping forward to rest against the back of Lucretia's hand, brushing lightly over her wrist. Even if things between them are still a little shaky, Lup does it because the elf is more than a little starved for closeness as of late and Lucretia remains someone she trusts. She'd burned through most of her anger already, the slap and resulting sobbing fit the full of extent emotions the elven woman was willing to allow herself in this place.

The truth was hard to accept but Lup just had to swallow the fact that Lucretia couldn't just snap her fingers and fix the mess she'd made. And well, if Lup couldn't have her brother back as immediately as she'd hoped, she wasn't fucking going to lose her best friend too. Not a chance.

Suck up the tears. Ignore the dull ache in her heart. Keep looking for a solution. She couldn't give up hope completely.]

Yeah, just one fucking day of the three hundred and sixty-five you had to endure. [Lup's handful of weeks on the road had been lonely enough, but at least she'd always known she could turn around and go back to her family at any point. Lucretia was just completely, utterly alone there on that plane, hunted by strangers and forced to learn to survive on her own.

There's so much Lup could say in response to that. She wants to talk about her friend's strength, how proud she was of her survival, how even after a year spent in hell it amazed her that Lucretia hadn't lost the goodness of her warm heart. But something else slips out, because of course it does.]

We did it for you, y'know. [It was probably something assumed, but never actually spoken aloud.] Bar and I wanted to keep that from ever happening again. For the mission to land completely on one person's shoulders like that. It was too much.

I mean, it wasn't all just for you, obvs, but you were always most on our minds while we planned. We loved you. And I... I just couldn't stand the thought of you ever having to go through that shit again. I would've done anything to prevent it.

[She closes her eyes as Lup's hand meets hers, turning her wrist over to touch her fingertips to Lup's. She doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve Lup's forgiveness, and affection, and touch. Lucretia's going to say something about it until Lup speaks again, and her eyes open, looking towards the other woman in disbelief.

We loved you.

It makes her want to cry.]

Lup, I... I know that cycle was the catalyst to it. To everyone being so cautious.

[She wants to say she could handle it. She wants to say she could have made things right. But she failed that at the Bureau too, didn't she? Had to bring the boys in without being able to tell them the truth, because she just couldn't make it work.]

You shouldn't have, if it was for me. You gave up your life. You don't regret that, at all? Were you ever afraid?

[Lucretia's hand turns and Lup wastes no time in twining their fingers together, palm-to-palm. Lup's skin is warm, roughened from centuries of accidental burns. Her gaze drops downward, to focus on their hands. This isn't what she wanted to say, but now that they're speaking, neither of them have much control over the flow of conversation.

The question leaves Lup snorting softly, as if the weight of what her and Barry did meant so little.]

Do I regret it? For you? Nah. [Their lich forms had turned out to be helpful on plenty of occasions over the last two decades, even without all of the crew dying off in a cycle. There's no regret there.]

And I mean, yeah, I've been afraid before. [Lup leans forward to rest her chin against the back of the chair she was sitting on, eyes flicking up to look at Lucretia again.] Watching the Hunger descend on the animals of that first plane we traveled to. Or that year Taako left me behind with you nerds for a good eight months without him. And fuck, even the performance at the conservatory. I remember not being able to sleep the night before, just totally wound up and terrified of what would happen.

--But not of that. Barry and I knew what we were doing. We spent years planning and researching, talking about it endlessly from every angle. You know how he gets, I wasn't getting a word in until he made sure I knew freakin' everything. And by that point, there wasn't any reason to be afraid. It's all just magic and science, and what's so scary about either of those? So we did what was best to keep everyone safe.

[She squeezes their palms together, letting her own hand envelop Lucretia's in the burning warmth of the elf's skin.] And see? I'm pretty dang alive, so it worked out.

[Lucretia laughs, but it's hardly even one; a exhale with a jerk of her chest, the corners of her mouth barely tilting upwards, eyes closed. Something resigned, like something she should have known but can never quite believe. For having one been the linchpin of the world, the single thing standing between the world and the Hunger, it's still hard to think sometimes that she could have been that important. For spending so, so long with the world resting on her shoulders, she's gotten used to the weight. It's a part of her, as it presses down on her, as her collarbones crack. Who could help her? Who could ever?

But that's finally the truth of it, the realization she was reaching for, and the next part slips out even when she doesn't want it to.]

I guess I can't imagine someone working so hard to save me.

[Because that's what it comes down to. Not that she can't believe people could love her, because of course they can, because of course they do. But it's Lucretia's job to sacrifice. It's Lucretia's job to burn. Everyone can sleep and when they wake, she'll have fixed it all. It's all she ever wanted.]

I just... I want to say I could've handled it, because I did. If I did the impossible then, I should have been able to help you all in the future. You shouldn't have had to--to even get there.

I finally wanted to do something useful.

[She shakes her head a little, pressing the heel of her palm into her forehead.]

Oh, I sound ridiculous. This wasn't what this was supposed to be about.

[Well fuck. That hurts.

And really, Lup tries to not look too offended by the statement, but it's difficult for her to not react, her eyes widening at the cutting honesty of that statement. How could Lucretia ever think that she wouldn't have given up everything to keep her safe? After everything they'd been through, a hundred years worth of memories together, how could she not believe in Lup?

Maybe she's been focusing so intently on the shades of Lucretia that she remembers in this new woman that Lup just keeps missing how different she's become. The changes there aren't all physical.]

We never doubted you could handle it. [When Lucretia had emerged changed from that year, they'd all been so proud of her, delighted to see her grow and thrive after that awful experience.] But you shouldn't have had to. None of us deserved that.

And you already were, dummy. You saved our asses more than once.

[She might not have been Magnus rushing in to take the fatal blow for someone else or Merle letting himself be killed year after year in the hopes of getting through to the Hunger, but her talents and her place on the team were just as invaluable. They wouldn't have made it as long as they had without her.

Lup deflates a little against the back of the chair, lounging like a cat] What's this about then, Luce?

[She's not even sure she wants to answer that, when Lup says it. If she's being honest with herself, she doesn't even know how. But the event makes her speak before she can think of a way to compose her thoughts.]

I don't-- I don't know, Lup. I just wanted to be able to fix it. I wanted to be strong enough to protect all of you and I wasn't. You still had to give things up for me, and wouldn't let me put my plan in motion to just help all of you. I worked so hard. That should mean... something.

[She closes her eyes a moment, steadies herself with a sigh. Is she even talking about the cycles anymore? Maybe. But in another sense, not really. Not when she just wanted to fix the world.]

I guess I just... admired you all so much. I wanted to be like you all were. Brave, and strong, and... I always felt like I was just pretending.

[Her head is back against the chair, but she keeps her eyes closed, trying to envision a future in her head if everything had worked, if everything was okay.]

It just seems silly, when I say it now. All of it seems foolish.

[Foolish was pretty much the most accurate word to use to describe any of what they all did. They'd tried their hardest, put absolutely everything they could into saving the world, but foolishness won in the end. They'd all messed up. The world they'd landed on had suffered.

Lup had struggled with it for so long, months upon months of suffocating guilt that leaked out into her dreams. With every new city destroyed by the gauntlet, she'd withdrawn even more into herself until she'd barely recognized the woman she'd become. So she'd left. Took everything into her own hands and disappeared.

To somehow end up here in Wonderland instead.

But they've already had the big emotional conversation about the relics, about Lup's failure. She's not necessarily over the hurt there, but it's easier to shove aside the pain knowing that Lucretia's already recovered her relic and kept it safe. Whatever happens to that world next, at least it won't have gone up in flames. It's a relief that Lup's been happy to live in.]

Y'know what? This is stupid. [It's pretty abrupt, but when has Lup ever been subtle? The elf rises to her feet in a single, swift movement and tugs at Lucretia's hand, motioning to for her to follow.]

C'mon. We're getting out of this depression zone.

[If given the option, Lucretia would probably wallow the rest of the day in this space she'd carved for herself. It's what seeps in through all her quiet moments, where her life isn't forcibly filled with action to diffuse the pain. To scatter herself, so she doesn't have to focus on it so long.

But finally, after all these years, there's this beacon of Lup, of light and love and even now she feels her heart rise as the elf keeps her hand clasped tight. Lucretia follows, like a siren call, something tugging at the edge of her mouth that might not be happiness but could pass for a smile.]

Where are we going? I believe this whole mansion can be classified as a depression zone, considering the circumstances.

[For just a second, before everything catches up to her, it feels like old times again. Like Lup sliding into her room as Lucretia worked, running her hands up her shoulders, tugging her from herself and into the world. But does she even deserve that anymore? Does she deserve Lup?

No. But she has always been so, so selfish.]

C'mon, Luce, isn't it obvious? [The elf drags her forward, quickly out of the library and into the hallway of the mansion, Lup peeking over her shoulder to shoot her friend a lopsided, curling grin. The happiness doesn't exactly reach her eyes, but it's so much more warmer than she's been able to share with Lucretia so far into their stay in Wonderland.

Things are still so overly complicated and Taako has yet to remember who she is, but Lup can't deny how much comfort she feels in Lucretia's presence here. Having her best friend around has made the whole place seem less lonely, and even with all of the shit between them, Lup trusts her.

She guides the other woman to the stairs, squeezing her hand playfully.]

The whole mansion bites, so let's get outside. We can roll around in the grass and smell the flowers and just chill out under the sun. It'll feel rad. Maybe you should break out the colors and paint something pretty. [She laughs.] Like me!

[Even seeing Lup's smile towards her feels like a blessing and a curse, her heart beating heavier in her chest. Lup deserves better than this. She had obsessed for so long where she would send everyone when she implemented her plan-- but Lup never got even a bit of that happy ending. Lucretia owed it to her now, and more. She needed to be better while she was hurting. She needed to be kind in a way she hadn't been in a long time.

The real issue is that with Lup saying things like that, she's going to embarrass herself much, much sooner.]

You would be the most beautiful thing there as it is.

[Y'know, like that. Fuck, this is not the problem she thought she'd be having with brutal honesty.]

I mean-- if that's what you would want. I confess, it's been a long time since I had time to really paint. I might be a bit rusty.

[It's not something Lup hasn't heard before. She knows she's beautiful, has known since she was young, ever since strange men had leered at the pair of young elves because of their sharp, attractive features while they'd tried their best to just stay invisible. But the word seems to take on a different meaning when it falls from Lucretia's lips.

The other woman's whole world is words. Lup's always been convinced that at night, while she's closing her eyes to sleep, that Lucretia sees the image of letters scrawling across the back of her eyelids, the start of a new page in her journal flowing out into physical words while she rests.

So Lup's a little pleasantly surprised by Lucretia's word choice, peering over her shoulder at her friend. Her smile curls, sharp and familiar.] Well, duh.

[But the soft touch of pink against her cheeks is enough to show Lup's flattered. Coming from Lucretia, being called beautiful meant something. It leaves the elf humming happily while she drags her friend forward.]

Wouldn't mind watching you paint. But I'll pretty much take any excuse I can to hang with you.

[Admittedly, Lucretia has always enjoyed art. There are places where words fail, areas where showing someone a sketch clears up everything. But in the end, her words have always been the thing that serves her most. Words have choice, and intent, and the push and pull of them has been what she makes into her life. Words are her art, and to make Lucretia lost for them is a feat.

A feat that, like much else, Lup has accomplished better than anyone else.

For someone who has so much to say, so many ways she could say it, Lup always seems to stun her into a silence that still managed to feel so warm.

Lucretia doesn't want to let go of Lup's hand ever again.]

Well, it would be awfully hard for me to paint you if you were watching me.

[Maybe she's more eagar on this than previously thought. Or maybe she's just keeping the joke.]

We could take a detour through an empty room to get some supplies. Though you know I always have my pen and a journal on hand.

[Lup peers back over to Lucretia, still grinning like a cat, before she focuses forward and quickly changes their path.]

Nope. It's gotta be paint. A simple sketch can't contain all of this. [Lup gestures to herself with her free hand, up along her slender frame, stepping closer to give Lucretia's hip a playful bump with hers.] If we're doing this, we're doing it right, Lucy. No buts about it!

[It isn't difficult to figure out which rooms are vacant, though Lup's still a little weary in throwing open just any door after everything she's walked into today. But the first one seems right on, because neither of the woman are immediately assaulted with some stranger's darkest thoughts, so Lup drags Lucretia inside and makes a beeline for the closet.]

Pick out whatever you need, babe. Go nuts! This and the kitchen pantry are like all this place is actually good for.

[She can't stop a small shake of laughter as Lup taps against her.]

Well, I don't think I have it in my heart to deny you, if that's what you want.

[Gosh, she wish she hadn't said that. But thankfully, there's time for distraction as she stands in front of the closet, thinking for a few moments before opening it up and starting to drag items out onto the bed. There's a new canvas, a folding easel, a tray for bits of paint, a caddy with a few basic colors, and three different weight paintbrushes. In addition, there's two pencils and a thick eraser for sketch lines. She stares at all of it a moment, then turns back to the closet and pulls out a canvas bag that it all gets dumped into so she can carry it over her shoulder.]

Honestly, I find myself wondering exactly how this place can create at such a rapid pace. At first I thought it was illusory, but they absolutely seem to be as tangible as the structure around us. If this is illusion magic, it's at a power that shouldn't even be possible, let alone sustainable. But I still find myself thinking anything I pull from these will disappear if I turn my back for too long.

[It's a little embarrassing, to be so caught with her internal monologues forced forward, but at least Lup doesn't seem to mind-- or at least, she'd likely hear it if she did. She moves back towards the door, assuming Lup is following close as they head outside.]

Have you been to the gardens yet? They seem incredibly well maintained, considering there doesn't appear to be a groundskeeper to speak of.

[Well. Damn. This whole truth event thing has been nothing but a total nuisance so far. Lup's spilled her most private woes to no less than three people so far, tearing up in frustration in front of one when the words just wouldn't stop spilling from her too willing mouth. But now that Lucretia's on the other end of it, calling her beautiful, saying she didn't have it in her heart to deny her... Well, maybe this whole event isn't complete shit.

Lucretia's sorting through the closet while Lup watches, huffing out a small laugh in response.] Luce, if it lets me spend more time around you, I'm always gonna be all for it. A lot of shit's changed for us, but that never will.

[That's just the truth, whether Lup meant to say that or not. But how could Lucretia not catch on after all these years? Sure, Lup enjoys watching her paint, loves to hear her stories, but so much of it had just been the perfect excuse for Lup to get in time with her.

The other woman begins pulling out equipment and rambling about the nature of Wonderland's magic, giving them both a chance to cool down from their too honest truths, before she's eagerly diving right into the convo with her. It's been something that's been on Lup's mind since her arrival as well.]

Right? I've tried asking around about the magic in this place and just how that shit is powered, but no one I've chatted at seems to have any answers. It's a lot of dead ends and 'I dunno's. It's amazing, but-- [Her thin shoulder shrug.] No luck.

[Lucretia moves to swing the canvas bag over her shoulder, but Lup's already snatching it from her hands and throwing it over own. Her hand slips down to quietly find the other woman's again, as if she can't stand not holding Lucretia's hand.]

You could say that. [And at least this truth comes out easily, Lup unable to hide her toothy grin at the memory.] I deffo threatened to burn it down my first day here. I wasn't nearly as chill about it as you.

[She giggles as Lup barges her way into her presence again, relieving her of the bag and her solitary hand, even as she awkwardly reaches to tuck the easel and canvas under her other arm. She’s about to gush something about being close to her and how much she adores it when Lup speaks again, and it’s all replaced with an ugly snorted noise, almost dropping the easel as she goes to cover her mouth from the laughter.]

Lup, I—fuck, of course you did. That’s so you.

[She doesn’t even know what that means. It just seems to fit so well.]
I don’t know if I was chill so much as I was freaking out the entire time. It’s been a long time for me since I woke up in a new world and certainly not by myself again. Especially with where I was before, with the Hunger having just resurfaced, I, uh, I just kind of thought I might have already died.

[A small pause.]

Well, that’s terrible. Anyway, uhm, let’s give you another look, huh? I’ll... escort you, or something. Neither of us have to go it alone for now.

[That’s good enough. Lup’s been tugging her this long, but at least now she has a direction.]

I... don’t want to go without you again.

[It's incredible how the sound of Lucretia snorting like that feels as familiar as breathing to the elf, who can't help but laugh along with the other woman, giving her a playful nudge in the side with her elbow.]

Yeah, well, you know me. What's the point of being dragged into another dimension if I don't leave everyone with an unforgettable entrance?

[Which Lup certainly had done, in all of the worst of ways.]

Please, [Now that they are all settled, Lucretia's bag slung over shoulder and her hand twined with hers, Lup is content to take lead to the grounds. Once they arrive, she'll let Lucretia pick a place that inspires her to paint.] As if Death ever stood a chance against a badass chick like you. You'd beat 'im down and tell him to come back when your schedule was a little more free.

[The elf had been content to let their earlier sappiness drop once the conversation shifted towards the more ridiculous, but now that Lucretia's speaking, she can't help the way the words flow from her mouth.]

You won't have to. I'm not going anywhere, Luce. I know I fucked things up pretty spectacularly before, but I'm not going anywhere. You don't have to do any of this shit alone again.

Edited 2018-01-07 03:29 (UTC)

[Lucretia wishes she has more words to describe the situation, the feeling of Lup pressing herself close, but it's just comfort. It's just something warm, and familiar. If she were being cruel to herself, she would describe it as feeling young again.

But that's not coming back. And dwelling on it now would only be taking her away from Lup, which she never wants to do even to herself.]

You're not the only one who's made mistakes, Lup. I don't hold your choices against you. Someone needed to do something. I only wish I had stepped forward before you had to.

[She walks with Lup outside, eyes scanning the garden before she picks a nook to the side. There's plenty of visuals of the garden itself, but also space where they can see over the flowers to the beach and ocean on the horizon. Most importantly, it's quiet, save for the sound of the babbling fountain and Lup's sweet words filling her ears.]

So, are you planning on posing for me? Or were you just wanting to watch? Either way, I'm sure it will be enjoyable, but anything's more beautiful with you.

[Gods, she wants to swallow her own tongue. She blushes, just a bit more, but doesn't have a good cover for how embarrassing that sounded, so she'll just try to let it pass.]

[It's a conversation that Lup is happy to let slide. They've already done the over-the-top, dramatic reunion once since arriving in Wonderland. There's no reason to drag shit out for a second time. This truth event sucks enough as far as Lup is concerned, so they may as well make the most of their time together. Truth be told, they both could use a little easy fun after how serious everything's felt since Lucretia's arrival.

Lup would really just like the chance to spend time with her best friend without bringing up their past mistakes or Lucretia's unintentional betrayal. Just one afternoon where she doesn't have to agonize over having her twin forgotten her. Over being erased from the memories of the people who mean most to her.

The elf follows while the other woman picks out her carefully selected spot, gently lowering the bag of supplies to the ground. She trusts Lucretia to set everything up on her own, Lup already plopped on the ground while she watches the other's process. Even outside of the mansion, the truth still spills forcefully from their mouths, but by the way Lup's cheeks go pink, she doesn't completely mind when the topic is so much lighter.]

Look at that blush, girl. You're so fucking cute when you go red like that. [She's older and so much more sophisticated and put together than the girl Lup remembers, but Lucretia's blush is still the same. Still just as easy to fluster.]

Like I'd ever give up the chance to pose. Just tell me how you want me. [Something comfortable that won't mess up the art too badly if Lup starts fidgeting out of boredom.]

Edited 2018-01-15 21:14 (UTC)

[Lucretia ducks back around the canvas when her face goes red, getting brushes set and the stand positioned, just giving her hands something to do. Of course, then Lup says the next bit, and she starts speaking before she realizes it.]

I can think of plenty of positions I'd want you in.

[The next sound is the audible slapping of her own hand over her mouth, effectively muffling anything that may have come after that part. Just kill her. Just kill her right now it would be kinder. When she thinks she has her shit compiled, she starts trying to speak again, moving her fingers enough so Lup can hear her.]

-- For the painting, I mean. Whatever's comfortable for the painting and anything else you might want to do, I mean--

[Nope nope hand over mouth again she can do this one handed. She can write with both hands, she can paint with them too, this is so fine. Lup can still probably hear the next sentence through her fingers.]

You know, I'm beginning to hope you just light me directly on fire.

[It usually takes a lot to leave Lup blushing, but Lucretia manages to make the elf's already pink cheeks go darker, her brows jumping upwards towards her hairline. Of all the things she could have expected to hear fall from the other woman's mouth, that most certainly hadn't been it.]

Shit, Luce. [Lup giggles while her long legs stretch out in front of her on the perfect grass. She leans back on her hands, gaze finally drifting back to the other woman. It's impossible to ignore how red the two of them are, just what secrets are itching to be aired after being kept hidden for so long.] All you ever had to do was ask, y'know. To, uh, get me in any of those positions. [a beat, before she adds, teasingly,] For painting. Natch.

[Lucretia is clearly mortified, but the elf just laughs again at her desperate plea to be set aflame. It's never going to be that easy to get away from Lup now, Lucretia.] If you need a minute or two to catch your breath before you start sketchin' shit out, you could come pop a squat next to me. [Lup runs her hand along the grass, right at the empty space next to her.]

Grass is pretty cozy.

[Please just kill her end her right now. Lup blushes and Lucretia sinks her face into her hands, not thinking many words other than screams right now. This is the worst thing to ever happen to her. She finally gets Lup back and she's going to ruin everything by being this-- this fucking way, this obtrusive butting in of something she should be well past by now. Lup has Barry. And just because he's not here doesn't mean she can just-- do this, now. It's too late. She needs to just get that and not... and not...

She walks away from the easel, from the supplies, and sits down next to Lup, putting her hand over where the other woman's is out in the grass.]

Yes. I suppose it is.

[She should say something, but she can't think of a single word. Maybe that's a blessing. She also feels impossibly sick.]

I'm... I'm sorry. Today's been messy. It's been a long time since I haven't been able to edit what I say.

[Lucretia may be ready for death, but even flushed as she is, Lup's loving every moment of this. The whole truth thing may have left the elf in a few uncomfortable positions, but it almost feels worth it to see such a candid and sincerely honest side to Lucretia. Not that her friend isn't always honest with her, but there's a clear difference in Lucretia saying exactly what is on her mind versus spending her time crafting perfectly complex sentences that always hold a hundred separate layers Lup doesn't have the patience to sift through.

This makes everything so much easier on her. It makes a lot of years spent waifing around in uncertainty seem wasted.

The other woman joins her on the lawn and Lup wastes no time in slipping a slender arm around Lucretia's middle and dragging her backwards onto the grass, so they can lay sprawled out there under the sun together. The elf rolls over onto her side and props herself up on a pointed elbow, before her free hand is slipping forward to dance along the other woman's neck.]

Hey, I'm into it. [Her fingers trail up over the other woman's jaw, all the way up to her ear, Lup's gaze following their path.] I like getting to hear your thoughts. All the shit you'd never say with gettin' trashed first. [Lup's mouth twitches, unable to hide her grin.] And you used to talk some mad shit when you'd get trashed.

[Her touch slips across Lucretia's cheekbone, brushing against flushed skin.] But we always had a lot of fun, huh? We'd take over your room and just lose hours together. Wear each other's clothes and bitch about the crew. Or we'd wake up with your fingers tangled in my hair and me clingin' to you like a lil' gremlin. [The memories leave Lup feeling warm and just impossibly happy. They were some of her favorite memories of her time on the Starblaster.

Her fingers finally come to a stop right over Lucretia's lips, pressing softly there, Lup's gaze finally flicking up to meet the other woman's.]

I really want to smooch your brains out.

Edited 2018-02-06 06:55 (UTC)

It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you! | OPEN MINGLE

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