It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you! | OPEN MINGLE

[vitaelamorte]

Who: EVERYONE!
Where: EVERYWHERE!
When: Friday October 27th - Tuesday October 31st
Rating: PG-13, warn if you're gonna go higher!
Summary: A catch all for the Horrible Memory Truth Event!
The Story:

For the duration of this event, everyone's entire room will be replaced with a memory playing on loop. They will likely recognize the moment as soon as they see it – it is a moment they remember as the worst moment of their entire lives. It could be a memory from home or something that happened in Wonderland. Lengths of the memories will vary, but they will find that these are not memories they can merely watch – they can step into these memories and attempt to make changes to them, and the memories will be long enough that they have time to make changes (though no more than 24 hours). However, anyone who tries will find that it is futile. No matter what you do or how hard you try, the outcome is always exactly the same somehow. No changes you make will prevent that horrible outcome. It just happens over and over and over again no matter what you do.

On top of that, perhaps complicating any attempts to make changes, everyone will be forced to be honest for the duration of the event. No lies or half-truths are allowed, and filters will be gone for the entire five days. If something bothers someone then they will blurt it out, regardless of whether or not it hurts someone's feelings, and no one will be able to simply keep quiet when they have something to say. They must be truthful and honest with every word they say.

This is a catch-all log for all of your Worst Memory needs! Please mark your threads clearly in the subject line with your character's name and Room Number + Floor for character rooms, or just location if you're making a top level for a public place in the mansion (like the tea rooms or the kitchen) so people can see if there's already a thread available. And here's the plot post if you need it!

Have fun!

Comments

cw: suicide ideation

[postictal]

[HI THIS OFFICIALLY SUCKS ]

Why can’t this place just let us stay dead? It’d make things a hell of a lot easier if I could just get myself out of the way and let everyone else live their fucking lives like they’re meant to.

[Immediately, he pressed a knuckled fist to his mouth and grimaces. Fuck this. Fuck all of this. And fuck this place for making him say it.]

[beatupgrass]

[Rocket goes silent, having hit the point where he no longer has anything to say in agreement. As brutal and awful as his life is, he's never thought about ending it permanently. If he did, the whole hero thing would have appealed to him a lot more- at least make an inevitable demise mean something. At least he'd understand why Groot and Yondu chose it.

But that doesn't mean he stays silent for long. What would normally make him just shrug and think "not my problem" has him suddenly pressing forward.]

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Dude, you can't think like that. That means the other guys win, and that's about the only frickin' thing that guys like us have.

[postictal]

[Hm. Don’t like this. Tim shrugs, or tries to - the motion ends up looking as strangled as it feels, the muscles coiled to tight and the tension too insurmountable. How’s any of this make it better? Why’s Rocket even give a damn? Is he making another mistake, again? Roping someone into his problems, whether they asked for this or not?]

What - the hell do you mean? What’s it matter if they win?

cw: suicide for probably the rest of this thread tbh

[beatupgrass]

'Cause you lose? [It makes perfect sense to him. But he's not actively or passively suicidal.] And it means everything that happened to you broke you so bad, you can't put yourself back together again.

[So maybe he's projecting a bit. IT'S THE EVENT.]

WHOOPS YEAH THAT

[postictal]

["Lose"? Lose what? It's occurring to him that there's a certain subtext here that's rapidly crossing the threshold into being text, but he has no idea how to address that without being an absolute jerk about it.]

[Unfortunately, the unyielding need to tell the truth has other plans.]

I already knew I was broken. Sometimes there's no fixing that.

[beatupgrass]

Of course there's no fixing that, but what're you gonna do instead? Lay down and die?!

[And there it is. The undeniable truth. Actively or passively suicidal he might not be, but he's not afraid to die, either. He just doesn't want it to be because he stopped fighting.]

[postictal]

[So that’s - that’s what he’s afraid of. Standing there and taking it. Becoming complacent in his own undoing. He wishes he could have that tenacit.]

I just don’t want anyone else to feel like this. Who cares about what happens to me?

[beatupgrass]

[That shuts him up for a second- or at least startles him. He pushed people away so hard that he might not have had an answer to that (except he cares what happens to him- if he didn't, he would have stayed on Half-World.

But he can't lie and he can't bullshit, and he can't really evade the question, so he just withdraws a bit.] I'm sure somebody does...

[postictal]

[He doesn't really have it in him to be offended. He barely knows the guy, and even with what little they do know of each other, it's not like they've got a whole lot to bond over other than trauma as it pertains to doctors that neither of them wants to talk about.]

I know. I know some people do, I just - wish they wouldn't. It'd be easier if I didn't get attached. It's always easier if you just don't get attached.

[beatupgrass]

It would be, but you can't do it! You can't be that guy, 'cause if you are, then- then no one even cares. You just end up feeling that's what you deserve, and then you get this-this hole inside of you and even a little bit of love tells you it's never gonna be full, and it scares you, but that same little bit of frickin' love tells you if you died, someone would mourn you. You'd be remembered somehow as something more than a waste of space.

So you gotta let 'em in. You gotta get attached... Otherwise you're just gonna die and nobody will even care.

[Wow. There's some honesty. It's half regurgiated from Yondu and half just projecting and talking about his own issues over the top of Tim's but it's no less honest and true, and maybe he can get through to someone like Yondu did for him.

Normally, he wouldn't care about doing that- he doesn't know Tim well enough for that, but... the event knows what's lurking in the back of his head and in his heart. He'd have said this to anyone who gave him reason to. Tim was just the one who did.]

[postictal]

What’s so wrong about that?

[What’s so terrible about never being remembered? It’s not like he doesn’t know exactly what the hell Rocket’s talking about, but at the same time - ]

So how come you’re still pushing people away?

[beatupgrass]

[Rocket draws back like he's been punched and stammers for a second.] I... I don't know. I don't have a good reason. Scared that it's too late for me, I guess? Maybe.

[Honestly, it's been a big problem with him since he came back to Wonderland.] Or just... Frickin' scared that every person I like here is just gonna up and leave someday, and it hurts every damn time.

[postictal]

[Immediately, he can’t help but feel like a jerk. Pouring their guts out, both of them, and Tim manages to twist that into a personal attack. As always. It’s what he’s sondamn good at, huh? ]

I don’t... [Is it too late? Is it just easier to think it is?] I don’t think it’s too late. God, but I don’t. At least not for you.

[beatupgrass]

[Rocket flattens his ears to his head and glances behind him, looking to make a quick exit. This is getting all too real for him.]

Yeah... Maybe. But it might not be too late for you too.

[He makes an annoyed noise and takes a step backwards.] Look, I... I need to not be talking like this anymore.

[and he bolts.]

[postictal]

[It's...nice of him to say so. Especially 'cause he probably means it. What's he saying - he has no choice but to mean it. And he has no out except the obvious way, and Tim won't blame him for that.]

[He lets him go.]

[Hunches his shoulders, and does the only thing he can think of to do.]

[He lights up a cigarette.]