entrancelogs | and in the end if i don't make it on the list [ open ]

Who: Tim Wright and YOU! ...and guest
Where: It's a Wonderful Wonderlandland
When: January 19th - January 23rd
Rating: PG-13 probable
Summary: Tim's ideal world is simple. Incredibly simple. Except for the part where it's impossible.
The Story:

19th - 20th ; fantasy ; give me a boost over heaven's gate

Once he gets over how he has to shade his eyes against the diamond reflection of a too-bright sun, of the pumping lights and blinding colors of what looks like what might've been the end result if Lisa Frank took a couple tabs of acid and decided to start her very own apocalypse, he figures, correctly, that there's probably more to it than this. He prowls the edges of the bubble of increasingly absurd imagery, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It does.

He turns a corner, and there they are.

Sarah's hair falls back in a dark curtain as she laughs at something Seth just said. A little further - he can swear that's Jay there too, squirrely as ever, and the broad shoulders of a silhouette that couldn't belong to anyone but Brian.

But most startling, terrifying, unnatural than anything else, than the fact that they're there at all, is the way they all laugh and grin and joke freely and without abandon.

It's in the way they all look happy.

He doesn't breach that perfect world just yet. If this is his chance to watch what the world might have been without him, then why would he spoil it a second time? He can see them all like this, like they were meant to be, and no matter how thickly the nostalgia might build in his chest, how blindingly the ache of longing might tighten its stranglehold around his throat, he doesn't draw any nearer.

He simply settles down on the grass, draws his knees up beneath his chin, folds his arms around them and...watches.

21st - 23rd ; but i'm a missile that's guided to you;

Of course it wasn't real.

Apparently music is how you're supposed to destroy the things, but he's kind of lacking the instrumentation and an additional pair of willing voices for the sake of the three-part harmony that's supposed to be the kicker here. And, frankly, in his adrenaline-soaked, survivalist state, he doesn't have much of an instinct for memorization of lyrics from the Top Ten Hits From the Nineties listings in an off-brand version of a world not unlike his own.

It's kind of hard to be scared of zombies at this point, though. He'll give Wonderland that much; it sure knows how to desensitize.

He's not doing too badly, all things considered. You'll find him perched just alongside a sluggish river of viscous, rainbow-tinted water, having deftly dug a trench out from the sparkling earth and filled the bottom of the ditch with knitting needles, points up, to catch any one of the slavering horde that decides he looks interesting enough.

It's not a permanent measure by any means, but it's only until he can figure out how to get the busted karaoke machine he's been tinkering worth to start working again.

wildcard ; you're the one habit i just can't kick

[If you want a closed prompt with either Frisk or Tim, let me know here or at arrpee! Just because this is initially a Tim log doesn't mean I can't toss Frisk in if you wanna do something with them! I will match prose or brackets!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Two people. One person? Hard to tell. At least one of them is real, he’s pretty sure, seeing as he doesn’t recognize either one of them. And be from his head. His mental breaks are kind enough to be obvious in that regard, at least.]

[He regards them both quietly for a moment before he shrugs.]

They can’t see me, anyway. I checked.

[That’s what makes this the true fantasy, after all.]

[Tim himself has been omitted entirely.]

Edited 2018-01-23 20:56 (UTC)

[They can't see him? Still kind of creepy, but maybe that means...]

Are you... not real?

[Syd reacts suddenly, strongly, jerking her hand away from David.

You can't just ask people if they're not real, David, she says, staring down at her feet.]

No, Syd, it's okay, I'm sorry...

[He reaches over again and offers a gentle, soothing touch to her shoulder. She doesn't avoid him. She wraps an arm around his again, hesitant but not unwilling.

Syd comforted for now, he turns back to the invisible man.]

It's just that, you know, I... can't always tell. It's, uh, a thing. I'm working on.

[That almost seems like it might have drawn his interest - lifted an eyebrow, pulled at the patina of resigned apathy mingled with an inescapable ache of wistfulness that he can't quite erase. He can't always tell what's real. It's familiar. It's not something that many people will admit to.]

[It's not something he likes to admit himself.]

...y'know, I have trouble telling myself sometimes. [One hand creeps up to run through his hair.] I think I'm real. Hard to tell these days.

[Real as he ever is. Which is, unfortunately, somewhat of a point of concern.]

[Syd still seems somewhat agitated by the topic of conversation, which is a little weird for her. Normally, she's engaged in conversations about, you know, their brain stuff. She knows what it's like. She was the one who proposed the idea that a diagnosis is just as much a part of David as the rest of his personality.

He smiles a little to himself, remembering that.]

Sometimes, I... Heh, Syd'll tell you, she knows how I get, with all the... Um. Ahem. I'm just still getting used to figuring out what's Wonderland and what's... in my head. Syd's helping me with that, huh?

[Sydney nods stiffly.]

Yeah, Wonderland really doesn't help with that.

[He slips it from his pocket regardless, though. Little orange bottle, the label all torn, capped with white, and gives it an indicative little shake. People have seen him take it all over; it's not a big secret. The more people who know about his...issues, the better.]

[That way everyone knows how to steer clear of the fucking crazy.]

Though I guess we're not helpless.

[David's eyebrows raise at that, not expecting the man to just pull out a prescription to show off. David himself doesn't have anything but the empty pill bottle he fished out of the closet when he was still thinking about drugging the hallucination that Wonderland must have been out of his system. He chickened out, in the end, opting to continue off his medication and flushed the contents.

David scratches the back of his head.]

Clozapine, here. At least that was the main one. I didn't really expect to... run into anyone else who'd get it. Of course Syd does, but... I met her in the hospital.

[He averts his eyes away from the invisible man to the people talking and laughing with each other.]

Supposedly it was all... These people told me my superpowers weren't just in my head? But I still kinda... There's still a lot going on even with knowing that. Obviously.

You got superpowers outta the deal? [Color him jealous. He shoves the bottle back into his pocket with a wry twist to one corner of his mouth. All he got was a secondary consciousness that likes to run around wearing a mask at night, that likes to seize control whenever it can - and is frequently granted the window, courtesy of his own stupid, broken brain.]

Damn. That's a hell of a lottery to win.

Yeah, uh, it's kind of a monkey's paw sort of lottery. Like all those stories that are out there about people who win the lottery going bankrupt. I can't really... control them, or do anything worthwhile with them, other than... accidentally do horrible things.

[While it was Syd in his body when he killed his friend Lenny, it was his powers that she used. He could have easily done the same thing if he had a similar freakout. It's not like he's ever known how it works, just that... things happen and they're terrifying until they're not. Or until he discovers his best friend's body half-transported through a wall.]

Uh, this woman, though, she sort of walked me through concentrating on voices until I can hear one clearly and, uh, do this kinda...

[He gestures vaguely. He has no idea how to "show off" his "magic mutant powers". He's not very proud of them.]

I guess it's mind reading? That was pretty cool. Or at least not completely horrible.

You can read minds?

[Once, that might have spooked him utterly - might have caused him regard the other guy fearfully, several steps back, paired with a shrill warning to stay the hell out of his head. But now?]

[Now, it's not like there's very much in the world that might prevent the slow crawl of horrible things as they leach from his mind to another, spreading like the virus they are. It's not his fault he's like this.]

[It'd be cruel to blame him for that.]

It's... difficult. I usually can't understand it, 'cause it happens all at once, so... don't worry about hiding your thoughts from me. I only heard her because she was trying to reach me.

[Yeah, reading minds might not actually be the first power he should show off. Right. Maybe none of his powers are meant to be shown off. Whatever they're supposed to be.]

...well, you didn't ask for it, yeah?

[Nobody ever does.]

Is that - your friend there? The one who helped you? [He nods at her, though he can't be wholly certain that she's real either. It's hard to tell. Everyone seems distressingly solid, and unlike Tim's own fantasy world here, David's accompanying friend seems to understand that he actually exists.]

and in the end if i don't make it on the list [ open ]

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cw: internalized ableism

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