entrancelogs | open } ladadadada gonna bury you in the ground

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open } ladadadada gonna bury you in the ground

Who: Mazikeen and YOU
Where: the gardens
When: 4/9
Rating: PG-13 at least probably
Summary: Mazikeen is in Wonderland and now there's singing and fuck this she didn't ask for this.
The Story:

Ten minutes ago Mazikeen was on an airplane headed back to LA and ready to see her friends again. Because she weirdly misses them.

Now she's stalking through a garden, curved blades in hand, and glaring at all the brightly colored plants and clever topiary bushes. She has no idea where the fuck she is, but she knows she doesn't like it. She's passed five different people singing for no discernible reason! It's gross.

"Someone is going to die for this." Or maybe hurt. She hasn't gotten to let loose and torture someone in a while. She might be rusty. She'd have fun getting back into practice.

She passes another person singing and resists the urge to either slice their head off or stab her own eardrums out. Not being able to hear would be inconvenient if something more dangerous than singing appears, and Chloe would sulk if word got back to her about Maze murdering someone just for singing. Chloe gets uptight about so many things that Maze likes. She might like Chloe, sort of, but it's annoying as fuck. And sometimes she's not so sure if Chloe really likes her back, even if they are working out pretty well as roommates.

Someone else is singing. She glowers until she realizes it's... her.

"Sorry I don't treat you like a goddess
Is that what you want me to do?
Sorry I don't treat you like you're perfect
Like all your little cutesy humans do
Sorry I'm not made of sugar
Am I not sweet enough for you?
Is that why you always avoid me?
That must be such an inconvenience to you
Well... I'm just your problem
I'm just your problem
It's like I'm not even a person, am I?
I'm just your problem
Well, I shouldn't have to justify what I do
I shouldn't have to prove anything to you
I'm sorry that I exist, I don't get why you're always pissed
But I shouldn't have to be the one that makes up with you
So... why do I want to?
Why do I want to...
To... bury you in the ground...."

Finally she manages to break herself from the spell. "Ugh!" She hurls her blade as hard as she can at a nearby fountain, shattering the stone.

It's going to be a long fucking day.

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Lucifer picked the best time to show up, clearly.

Just after Chloe asks that question, there's the sound of clapping nearby as the Devil appears, looking ridiculously amused.

"Bravo, Detective. I promise, even if you both forget, I never will."

His grin widens, all teeth, as he looks over at his much missed demon bartender.

"Ah, Maze. I see Wonderland finally decided I needed some more help behind the bar. In any other circumstance, I'd say you're very late."

Good job, Lucifer, you provided a much needed distraction so that Mazikeen doesn't have to deal with Chloe singing about friendship. Instead she can turn her aggression on someone who can....

Well. Who could take it if Chloe weren't right here. Damn. She'd really like to throw her knife at him, but he might not catch it, and she doesn't actually want him dead.

She settles for whirling on him and glaring.

"Gonna be even later. I don't work for you anymore, remember?"

"Oh-kay..."

Chloe had spent the six months or so of knowing Lucifer doing her best to stay out of him and Maze's problems. It is obvious how much they care about each other, but Chloe never can read the signs of when they are and aren't on the outs, and she has zero interest in getting involved. Half because she isn't their therapist, and half because Lucifer is oblivious and Maze is fucking terrifying.

"Let's take a breath, all right?" Chloe edges between them, lifting her hands before shooting Lucifer and icy glare. Maze is freaking out here, Lucifer, read the room. "Maze said she was on a plane home from Canada, does that mean anything to you, Lucifer?" He's from further in their timeline than she is, and Chloe wasn't to get all their points oriented before they move on.

At first, Lucifer seems oblivious to the implications of that question. He simply smiles and looks between them.

"Not in the slightest."

And then it starts to sink in. Mazikeen in Canada? Surely he should know about that, unless....

"...bloody hell. You're from the bloody future."

"What's that supposed to mean? How is any of this possible?"

She doesn't know what's going on. She's rarely the most knowledgable person in the room, but she feels entirely lost right now.

She doesn't like it.

Chloe nods, turning her attention back to Maze. She drops her hand and moves closer to her friend, rests her hands on her hips, and takes a breath.

"Remember how I said that worlds cross into Wonderland and pull us in? We don't necessarily come from the same place when it does it. When I got here, Lucifer was from a few months in my past. He recently... Disappeared, and when he came back, he was from a few months in my future. It sounds like you're ahead of both of us. Time freezes back home, though, so when Wonderland puts you back, you come from the same moment you left and you won't remember any of this."

She frowns. "I know this is a lot to take in, Maze, but there's a lot more going on than that and the faster we catch you up, the more prepared you'll be for what this place is going to throw at you."

Not that Maze isn't more than capable of taking on just about anything, but Chloe figures she might at least appreciate the heads up.

"To summarize, it's all a bit of a mess, but you're stuck here now and only Wonderland can fix that."

He grins widely. Isn't he helpful?

"You should probably choose a room and decorate it. Oh, and the closets can give you nearly anything you could ever want."

She spares Lucifer a glance. "I'm staying with Chloe, obviously. We're roommates."

With that settled, as far as she's concerned, she looks back at the friend who is actually helpful.

"So there's some crazy time shit happening?"

"Yeah, the timelines are pretty crazy. Listen, Maze..."

This escalated... At about the pace Chloe should have expected it to considering the source. Obviously Chloe can't blame her; they are roommates, or they were, anyway. Chloe hasn't seen her in a year, from her perspective, and things had changed. A lot.

She hadn't exactly planned on telling Maze about this now, especially not with Lucifer hovering over them, but maybe it was best to get it out of the way before things got any more awkward.

"You actually might just want to get your own room. Uh, I, uh..." She clears her throat. "Well, Lucifer and I live together. Now."

"Have been for quite awhile, actually."

He doesn't seem to realize that this might hurt Maze's feelings? Surely, she would understand and be on her way. It wasn't anything personal.

"The club is on the sixth floor. You can stay next door if you'd like to be nice and close?"

Maze just looks between the two of them blankly, completely failing to get the gist. Obviously she knows Lucifer's into Chloe, and she even knows Chloe's more into Lucifer than she'll admit, but Chloe's a moron and Lucifer's even worse. The idea that they might have finally actually started boning just does not compute.

"What, rent that high around here? We can just go three way on it."

Of course she doesn't get it. One of the many things she and Lucifer share is a pretty regular propensity to completely miss the point. At least it also tells Chloe that she and Lucifer haven't gotten back together yet, at least from the point Maze is from.

If they ever are going to get back together at all.

"We're back together. As in, you know, dating." Chloe isn't sure living together constitutes as dating, exactly, but she doesn't know what to call that part in between dating and getting married, and she's not dumb enough to drop the word boyfriend right now. "I've been here for a year. And Lucifer's been here even longer. A lot has changed."

Lucifer's mind only barely wanders along Chloe's train of thought. He's far more interested in, well, rubbing this in Maze's face.

"Besides, you wouldn't want to live there if you don't, as you say, work for me anymore. It's still my penthouse above Lux, just in a fun little Wonderland pocket dimension of sorts."

She's about to sat it's about time, cause she'd be blind not to see the sexual tension between them and she's honestly surprised it's taken this long. Then Lucifer has to open his mouth, and she just shoots him a glare.

She turns back to Chloe. "He's going to disappoint you. Maybe not in bed, but everywhere else."

Chloe's mouth hangs open, her gaze passing in between the two of them. Part of her kind of wishes she had a better handle on what kind of friendship Lucifer and Maze have; now that she knows the truth about all of it (that Maze is actually a demon, that she worked for Lucifer in Hell and then followed him to Earth for some unknown reason), she thought it would be easier to better understand the two of them.

It's not, though. Maybe it's because she's never had siblings, and that's what this is like. Or maybe she'll just never understand because Lucifer and Maze are the most bizarre people she's ever encountered, not even including the whole "from Hell" part.

"Okay, take a breath. Lucifer, can you just... not be... you right now?" She steps towards him, lowering her voice. "Maze is freaking out right now, okay? You're making it worse." Chloe turns back to Maze and clears her throat. "Maybe we should show you around the Mansion or something."

Lucifer opens his mouth to retort to Maze's rather rude and false comment, then again to counter Chloe's request, only to slowly close it as her words sunk in.

Maze? Freaking out? He looks over at her questioningly before he finally shrugs his shoulders, shoves a hand in one pocket, and gestures with the other for her to continue.

"By all means, Detective. Give her the grand tour. I'm sure that will help."

It won't. Not at first, anyway.

Maze looks ready to throw down, but she lets Chloe talk her down. She shoots another glare at Lucifer. "Help more than anything you'd do."

...okay, she's only mostly talked down.

Yeah, Chloe definitely didn't miss this. Things with Lucifer are finally getting back onto more solid ground since he came back, but it isn't exactly sunshine and rainbows, either. Their relationship has been carefully weighted into an unsteady balance, and Maze is enough weight to tip it back into chaos, if she feels like it.

Considering Maze is the incarnation of chaos, Chloe doesn't have particularly high hopes.

"Luci-" She cuts herself off with an exasperated sigh. She had hoped he might want to help her orient Maze but, in typical Lucifer fashion, he didn't seem all that interested. "Listen, if you don't want to help, you can go home. I'll show her around." It's not said nicely.

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