entrancelogs | Open} It comes to say it’s hard now

Entry tags:

Open} It comes to say it’s hard now

Who: Barbie, Julia, Open to you
Where: 8th floor, in the tunnels, around outside
When: During July
Rating:
Summary: Preparing once more and ignoring the slot that had been in his head
The Story:

The Eighth FloorAnyone coming by might find Barbie moving from one room to another. One is the one that he is sleeping in, Julia's room where he is living. The other is the room he's taken over, that one would find his name on. No one is living actually in that room though.

Instead he's used the closets to outfit it with shelves and bookcases, totes and boxes. All of them were things that he wished they'd had in Chester's Mill to help them get through how bad things that had happened to them. He wouldn't let it happen here in Wonderland as well.

So he spends a part of each day working on stocking up on things he imagines they might need depending on how things go. The room has lanterns and canned food, bottled water and even scuba tanks. The Army had taught him to always think about how bad things could get. Chester's Mill had shown him just how bad it could be. He isn't prepared to let that happen to him and Julia in Wonderland.

The Tunnels

Several times throughout the month, Barbie can be found beneath the mansion, going through the tunnels. He wears a mining helmet with a light, steel toed boots, and climbing gear strapped to the backpack he is carrying.

Not that he expects to find a pit in the tunnels, but he can't help but to check things out and be sure.

Outside the Mansion

Throughout the month Barbie can be found around the mansion making sure he stays in shape. Running on the beach. Swimming in the lake. From time to time he also wills one of the rooms into a half court basketball court where he can be found shooting hoops and playing against "imaginary" players unless someone else chooses to join him.

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"Or help one another get through our unforgivable life choices," he notes in a low voice, leaning in close to her. "Because that's one thing you've given me. More than I've ever known. A way to find forgiveness in myself."

And he's been working on it, as hard as he can. Because hating himself for what he'd done was never going to help him with helping those in Chester's Mill.

"And nothing will. Not for either of us. Do you want to know the very moment I knew that whatever happened in that Dome, I wasn't going to give you up?"

She manages to smile at him warmly, just like his words seem to warm her insides. No one has ever talked to her like Barbie does, or made her feel as loved or as safe as he does. It's not even that she feels like he protects her, although that is part of it. But he also makes her feel like she could do anything, like he's her own personal cheerleader. Their relationship may have only been beginning at home, but Wonderland has only reinforced all of the feelings she had for him over the last few months.

"I have no idea. When?"

He grins then, remembering the moment. "When I told you that you weren't going to get those soldiers attention and you could walk naked in front of them and nothing would change... and you said you already had," he says, chuckling.

"I knew then you were the woman I wanted to try and have a life with, because of the woman you were. Are."

"I did? Oh my God."

She laughs, shaking her head and glancing away from him. "God, Barbie, I barely ever remember that. That whole morning was a whirlwind."

The Dome had only come down the night before. She clearly remembers the frustration and the fear, and how they both ran around town looking for answers in the short time before things really went to hell. She's not surprised that she did it, or that she had to gall to say that to him either; what is surprising to her is that his moment of truly knowing what she could mean to him was a moment so mundane she'd forgotten it.

In a way, that made it even better.

"Most guys would not have reacted that way," she admits. "I guess you got to know me faster than most people do."

"You did. Now, I was not there so I don't know if you really did it or not, but the truth? It is the kind of woman you are, and I believe you would do it. Because you're that determined and strong, and I have faith in you to do what you must. That's why I knew," he says, smiling at her.

Leaning in, kissing the tip of her nose. "You're an amazing, strong, determined woman and I knew then that whatever the Dome did, I would be on your side."

She shuts her eyes as his lips brush her nose, her cheeks flushing pink at the affectionate movement. She loves when he does that.

When she opens her eyes again she stares at him, her mouth curved into a smile, although it fades after a moment. She feels the same - all she needs is him, and she knows that they can take on anything together, be it Wonderland or the Dome or anything in between.

Still.

"Do you think the Dome will ever break?"

Certainly things were tense in speaking of those things. They weren't there, and there was more to have here than the Dome. Except, one day, they would be returned to all of that.

"Yes. I have to believe that eventually it will break. Something will have to happen and break it and we'll be able to go on about our lives." He arches a brow, leaning back a bit. "Do you believe it will?"

"I guess I have to believe it too. Mostly because I hate the idea of living the rest of my life under that thing. Do you have any idea how much I missed showers?"

Her mouth curves into a smile again and she bumps her shoulder against his.

"You have no idea how much it means to me that you don't hold what happened in Chicago against me. A lot of people would." She winces slightly, thinking about the camera next to her and her new role here in Wonderland. "I'm going to have to tell my new boss. If she finds out because of an event or if, God forbid, Junior shows up and airs our dirty laundry, she'll kick me off the team."

Of course, talks about the Dome and if they will survive it means that confession time isn't over with. Not with what he still has to tell her.

And when she goes on about Georgia finding out, he sighs, taking a breath.

"Okay so... confessions are a thing, right? Because I may have one more thing to tell you. I wasn't sure... because I don't know for sure, but you deserve to know. It's about when I came here, back in Chester's Mill."

Julia is still a little lost in her own thoughts, wondering how she is going to phrase her horrible secret to her new pseudo-employer, but the way Barbie is talking pulls her out of it.

This doesn't bode well. He got that same kicked puppy look when she dressed him down after the mono outbreak, and when she confronted him about Peter. It speaks towards his tenderness, sure, but he had promised her no more secrets that night, and yet he had hidden something about Chester's Mill from her.

Her first assumption is that she's dead, but it's fleeting. She would have been able to read that all over him, especially with how much closer they'd gotten since he arrived in Wonderland. Her mind instead shifts to the worst case scenario and she immediately feels a flush of anger, nothing like the simple abject sadness she had felt for him when he told her what he'd done overseas.

"I swear to God, Barbie, if you lied to me about you being executed..."

He winces, because he should have done this sooner. Except he can't guarantee any of it. He can't prove it. Why bring it up when it...

"Okay, look. No. I was not executed. The stars and all of Big Jim's shit, all of that happened like I told you. Then... shit started again, because of course it did. The bell literally flew out of the church steeple, metal was flying everywhere. Suddenly, with whatever happened..." Whatever dropping the egg did, but he doesn't say it. "It magnetized the Dome. So we go out to investigate. Linda, Big Jim, and me."

He pauses, taking a breath. "And I was still cuffed."

She listens to him carefully, taking in every word and still, it takes her brain a minute to catch up. The Dome magnetizing makes no sense, but what does anymore? Once she can get past that, though, she realizes the handcuffs, realizes what he truly means.

He was being dragged towards the Dome.

And so was everything else.

"No," she says, her voice hardened. "No, the Dome didn't let you live just so you could get dragged into it like that, just so you could..." She doesn't even know. At the best he could be hurt by the things getting pulled towards it. At the worst...

"I don't believe it." She takes his hands into hers, staring into his eyes. "The Dome will protect you. I know it will."

Barbie wishes he had as much faith in her place as the Monarch and what that means. If he had that though, he wouldn't have hidden this from her. It's something he feels he doesn't need to say, but is obvious not only in his silence but in the time it took for him to bring this up to her.

His hands cling to hers thought, hopeful that she is right, that what she says could and will be real and true. Yet he's not sure. He's not sure it's real, or that she will be able to save him. It protected the egg though, and in the end that is all that mattered.

"I hope you're right. I just... I didn't mean to keep it from you to lie to you. I just wanted us to be here, to have one another. But you deserve to know. I shouldn't have kept it from you. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize," she assures him as she squeezes his hands gently. "You were trying to protect me. There's so much going on here, and I understand."

They weren't words to placate him; she truly did know why he wasn't jumping to tell her. Life in Wonderland was hard enough without the constant shadow of Chester's Mill hovering over them. But it was also a reminder that they were getting too comfortable as they embraced their new life in Wonderland.

The problem was, Julia didn't really see it as a bad thing.

"I know... Things aren't the same here. It's not Earth, and we can't have a normal future with marriage and kids. Those are all things I want with you back home, if we can ever have them," she admits, breaking away from his gaze to look down at their conjoined hands. "But I feel like we have a reprieve here. Events aside, I feel like we have some time to have a life that isn't about the Dome, or me being the Monarch, whatever that even means. But we're here, together, and I don't want to waste any time having a life with you while I have the chance."

Despite her words, and truly believing them for what they were, he feels he needs to apologize. Hell, Barbie feels he owes her more than that though he's not sure what.

His fingers tighten against hers. "And, if you weren't sure of it? That's the things I want as well, Julia. All of it. But if we have to be here to have it? So be it. We can have all we can, even if it means taking in kids like we did with the Dome." Since they had both just adopted teenagers like stray kittens, after all. "So we do all we can here, and then whenever it sends us back? We find a way out of the Dome and we do it all over again. The way I see it? I get two chances at building a life with you. Most only get one."

"I'm sure it's only a matter of time before we pick up our fair share of Wonderland orphans. I know time supposedly isn't passing for them but it doesn't make me feel any better about Joe and Angie being there alone. At least Norrie still has Carolyn."

Who knew how long that would be for, though. Regardless of how much faith Julia wanted to put into the Dome keeping them safe, there was no way to be sure who would make it out and who wouldn't. After all, there had already been so many causalities in those two weeks alone.

"That said... I can't imagine doing this without you. Especially when you say really romantic things like that." Peter had never said anything like that to her, even on their wedding day. Sometimes, Julia wondered how much of their relationship was build on formality than actual affection. She didn't even realize she hadn't loved Peter, at least not the way she was supposed to, until she met Barbie and realized what love was actually supposed to feel like. "I love you. And whatever life we can build here together will always be good enough for me."

"We only have their word that things aren't moving along without us. Sure others have seen it but what of the time when it does start moving? What about if we stay here long enough?" He pauses then, because this talk makes him think of something else. "And what of them staying there, unmoving and locked in place for years while we're here. What does that mean for them?"

He just wants them safe and protected and he's not sure they have the means to do that for them.

"And I love you, which is why no matter what the events throw at us, I will do whatever I can for you, to be with you and our life," he says, leaning in to kiss her tenderly. There is more than heat there. Emotions that he's felt since the moment he met her. Emotions that transcend a beautiful woman with gracious curves and a fiery temperament. She is amazing, and volatile, and brilliant and he loves her.

Julia returns the kiss, relaxing into him as she feels her heart swell. It's always been so much more than sex between them; while Julia has no complaints in that department, she also knows she loved him far before it became physical. She has no idea where their lives back home will take them, but she can't imagine it could be all that different. The love they share and the unwavering faith they have in each other has only grown since their arrival in Wonderland, and Julia can't see that changing, regardless of what being the Monarch might mean for her, or what the Dome might throw their way.

When she finally pulls away, she smiles at him and tilts her head. "Come on, let's head back to the mansion. Watching you work out made me hungry."

Falling into bed with Julia was easy. Falling in love with her happened before he even truly knew it, and couldn't have stopped it even if he wanted to. Not that he had any desire to do that. Not now. Not ever.

They're here for now. Eventually they'll be back in the Dome. Either way, it will always be together and that's what matters no matter what either throws at them.

Pulling away reluctantly, he rise and offers her his hand. "Come on then. The diner is waiting for us."

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Open} It comes to say it’s hard now

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