If you could be any you, who would you be? [OPEN]

[radiopalkiller]

Who: EVERYBODY!
Where: TV Wonderland
When: June 29th - July 1st
Rating: anything from Teletubbies to Game of Thrones
Summary:
As announced this will be a catch-all post for shorter scenes, commercials, or things you simply don't want to make an entry for.

1. If you want to involve your character in anything and everything, leave a blank comment with them and see what others drag them into! Other characters will respond and set a random scene for the two (or three or seven) of you.


2. If you only have one particular thing in mind then set it up in a comment and wait for replies of anybody who wants to play along with the idea and stumble into that scene in their next response (or mark the thread CLOSED if you already have participants in mind)!

The Story:
Over the course of the event, everyone will be forced to act out various stereotypical roles and common tropes. The setting immediately around them will change randomly into settings from cliche popular media, complete with mediocre side-character NPCs who will never break character. It will become clear very quickly that they are expected to act out a particular role in the scene. They might be expected to be a tough cop, or a handsome sexy doctor, or someone’s evil twin come back from the dead, or any number of terrible tropes – and these tropes do not necessarily have anything to do with who the character is or what they do for a living. They could be the most innocent person and suddenly find themselves forced into the role of a hardened criminal.

Comments

[chloroformedthejanitor]

She blushes and looks down almost immediately at Philip's greeting, because this can't really be happening, can it? Right???? While her head's hung in abject horror shame awkwardness, she notices that she's...not wearing what she was earlier. She has an apron on, and a weird yellow dress. What? And whoa, okay, Philip's not dirty for once. That's new. And kinda nice.

"You're welcome, h..one..y?" She says, lifting her head again, and grimacing. She doesn't quite catch Philip's reply, because the voice distracts her, making her jump and slosh lemonade around. Good thing she has a tray.

"Holy crap-- Um." She looks around, and spots a broken shelf on the opposite side of the room.

"Phillip!" She puts as much sweet admonishment as she can into her voice, like a cheesy housewife. That's what this thing is going for, right? "I've been telling you to fix that shelf for weeks! Where-- um-- Where else are we going to put our photo???"

And then she shrugs at him, looking helpless.

[radiopalkiller]

Philip breathes a sigh of relief. Honestly, he was expecting the worst already, but now that he's thinking about it, there's not many ways it can even get worse, after a dating game and advertising for antidepressant drugs against erectile dysfunction.

"Right again! That darned shelf has been bothering sweet Annie for weeks, but what can you do, when her husband juuuuuuuuuuuust doesn't have the right tools to make her happy?"

That earns the invisible voice a peeved little eye twitch, before Philip glances back and shelf... and the hammer and nails on the counter next to it.

"I'm... sorry, you're right. I'll- I'll get right on that."

He grits his teeth and walks over to the broken shelf. Just a board that needs to be re-attached, and if it wasn't for that voice he'd expect it to be a matter of a few moments, but instead he's looking for a catch.

The nails look... just like nails, and the hammer looks like a plain and ordinary hammer. If that's the product they're supposed to be advertising then he can't say that they've spent a lot of thought on a flashy design.

Still, after giving Annie an uncertain shrug he takes the hammer. And two nails. And--

And stops short of the first beat, when the grim realisation hits him.

"Hang on, are we in one of those bloody infomercials now?" he whispers back to Annie.

"You know, the ones with the--"

He waves his hands vaguely. Jesus, those were the bane of his existence back when he still stayed up late, mulling over papers./i>

[chloroformedthejanitor]

Annie chokes on a laugh at the loud voice (announcer? narrator? she has no idea), and watches as Philip picks up the hammer and-- well, the idea hits her at the same time it hits him, because she rushes forward, stopping short when he whispers.

She nods, puts the tray of lemonade down and as she's straightening back up, whispers, "Yeah, so you're probably going to hit your finger or something." Or throw the hammer at her head. Again.

"People are always screwing things up first, right?" She says it innocently, as if she'd never stayed up for five days at a time on Adderall, watching every single minute of every single one that came on.

"Better get a move on, sweetie," she says, worried about the punishment for not doing this quickly enough. She already ended up in her underwear once, it doesn't need to happen again. "You need to get that done before, um, the party!"

[radiopalkiller]

"Right," Philip mutters to himself and takes a wary glance at the shelf in front of him.

You know it's bad when you almost catch yourself frowning at an imaginary party, but that's not where this story ends. Because the job looks entirely too straightforward, and he doesn't want to imagine when or how their genre will creep up on them.

But maybe he'll make it out alive unharmed if he takes the incentive.

Here goes nothing, he thinks with a shrug and offers Annie a less than reassuring smile before slamming the hammer into the wall with full force, nowhere near the nail or the shelf.

"Oh no," he says without the slightest trace of any emotion, "my hand must've slipped. Don't worry. I'll get it right the second time."

Philip pulls the hammer from the wall and, without the slightest pretense of even trying to fix the shelf, hurls it across the room where it shatters a fake window.

He sighs heavily.

"I'm so sorry about that, but I just can't keep a grip on this thing."

And it felt great, though the verdict on the consequences for his display is still up in the air.

[chloroformedthejanitor]

Annie shrieks-- really, did you expect anything else?-- when he slams the hammer into the wall, and moves to the side, out of the way of...well, nothing, but it's a reflex, okay? She can't help it! Anyway, she's glad she did, because in the next second he turns and throws the hammer out the window like he's some kind of wannabe lumberjack, practicing his axe throwing.

There's a long pause after he speaks, before Annie realizes it's her turn to keep them from being punished.

"Um, uh--" she sputters, trying to think.

"I-- I know! I wish they made something we-- you could actually hold on to..."

And an uncertain glance and shrug to Philip, who's actually starting to freak her out. He must have a lot of pent up anger to throw a hammer that hard. Just saying. Britta would have a field day.