The Kid (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
builditstrong) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
entrancelogs2014-02-21 08:52 pm
builditstrong) wrote in entrancelogs2014-02-21 08:52 pm
Entry tags:
Kid never much cared to speak of it - open
Who: The Kid and YOU
Where: The bar
When: Evening
What: Kid has come back to life after dying for the first time. He's not okay.
Rating: PG-13, descriptions of violence and gore
He comes to with a jolt.
It's like waking up, but harsher, more painful. In fact he can fool himself into thinking he's just waking up for a few moments. The rush of air and light and sensation, the forceful expansion of his lungs, the heavy thud as his heart starts again. First is the disorientation. He has no idea where he is, how long he's been asleep--asleep? No, something's not right. He's not in his room, for one thing. What happened...did something happen last night? Was it even last night?
No...
No, wait.
The miner. No. Not "the miner." Tom.
He'd followed him to the edge of the forest and--and they'd fought and--
He raises his hands above his head, stares at them.
He'd died. After everything he's been through, after everything he's done. After the Calamity, after restoring the Bastion, after Zulf's betrayal, after finding Zia again, after saving Zulf, after walking through the rows and rows of Ura warriors, after choosing to leave the ruins of Caelondia behind...
After coming here, all the people he's met, all the events, all the times he almost, almost...
He'd died, at the hands of someone he knew. He curls his fingers, digs his nails into his palms.
He'd promised himself months ago that he would survive this place, that he would go home and see them all again. That they'd all live out a long life aboard the Bastion, or wherever they chose to settle. No one knows what really happens when people go home. No one knows what dying here means for those people who leave. No one knows how it affects them. Kid never thought it would be without consequences. He told himself that he would survive. Just in case.
He failed. He didn't just die. He failed. He couldn't survive Wonderland. He couldn't even stop Tom from killing more people.
He failed.
---
He stays in his room for three days. Doesn't talk to anyone. Doesn't acknowledge that he's back to life. Doesn't check the network. Doesn't do much of anything, except turn his hammer over in his hands, sleep, stare out the window.
Eventually he can't take it anymore. Nor can he take the liquor he's getting from the closet. He needs to breathe.
He finds his way to the bar, keeping his head down the whole way there so he doesn't have to look at anyone. At the bar he finds the darkest, quietest nook, gathers all of the Caelondian alcohol, and starts working his way through it, one slow glass at a time.
Where: The bar
When: Evening
What: Kid has come back to life after dying for the first time. He's not okay.
Rating: PG-13, descriptions of violence and gore
He comes to with a jolt.
It's like waking up, but harsher, more painful. In fact he can fool himself into thinking he's just waking up for a few moments. The rush of air and light and sensation, the forceful expansion of his lungs, the heavy thud as his heart starts again. First is the disorientation. He has no idea where he is, how long he's been asleep--asleep? No, something's not right. He's not in his room, for one thing. What happened...did something happen last night? Was it even last night?
No...
No, wait.
The miner. No. Not "the miner." Tom.
He'd followed him to the edge of the forest and--and they'd fought and--
He raises his hands above his head, stares at them.
He'd died. After everything he's been through, after everything he's done. After the Calamity, after restoring the Bastion, after Zulf's betrayal, after finding Zia again, after saving Zulf, after walking through the rows and rows of Ura warriors, after choosing to leave the ruins of Caelondia behind...
After coming here, all the people he's met, all the events, all the times he almost, almost...
He'd died, at the hands of someone he knew. He curls his fingers, digs his nails into his palms.
He'd promised himself months ago that he would survive this place, that he would go home and see them all again. That they'd all live out a long life aboard the Bastion, or wherever they chose to settle. No one knows what really happens when people go home. No one knows what dying here means for those people who leave. No one knows how it affects them. Kid never thought it would be without consequences. He told himself that he would survive. Just in case.
He failed. He didn't just die. He failed. He couldn't survive Wonderland. He couldn't even stop Tom from killing more people.
He failed.
---
He stays in his room for three days. Doesn't talk to anyone. Doesn't acknowledge that he's back to life. Doesn't check the network. Doesn't do much of anything, except turn his hammer over in his hands, sleep, stare out the window.
Eventually he can't take it anymore. Nor can he take the liquor he's getting from the closet. He needs to breathe.
He finds his way to the bar, keeping his head down the whole way there so he doesn't have to look at anyone. At the bar he finds the darkest, quietest nook, gathers all of the Caelondian alcohol, and starts working his way through it, one slow glass at a time.
no subject
But...
Wasn't that how it was at the Bastion? Everything had been destroyed, everyone was dead, and there were so many times he just wanted to stop, to give up and lie down. But he never did. Rucks had a job for him, and Kid always did it. Always kept going, because what other option did he have? Rucks had offered hope, even though he'd known all along what the Bastion truly existed for.
Kid had gone as far as he had and done all the things he had done because it was all he possibly could do.
And he supposes it's all he can do this time as well.
"Keep on goin'."
no subject
"I don't know what else to do except that."
He'd had a lot of opportunities to ignore things, to just leave things to happen as they would, to give up. He never would have considered himself the type to interfere in anything in the past, but since the last year he spent at home, he'd realized there are times when he just can't let the world move past him. If he does that, he might as well not be existing at all--if he does that, the choice of existing might be taken from him.
That lesson was too well learned by the time he arrived in Wonderland for him to let himself give up, to not involve himself, to not think there was something he had to keep going for.
no subject
"Yeah. Figger I don' know either."
All he's ever done is kept going. It's either that or just never come out of his room again. And then what is he going to say to Zia and Rucks and Zulf if he ever does go home.
no subject
no subject
Psychiatry was never really a thing back home, and it wasn't like there was a therapist on the Bastion. The idea just seems kind of...silly to him.
no subject
"You already have. You don't have to anymore, if you don't want to."
no subject
He's tired, and at this point, also pretty drunk.
"But...thanks. Fer jus...fer bein' here."
no subject
"Is it okay if I stick around a little?" Souji taps the edge of his glass. "I'm not drunk enough."
no subject
no subject