entrancelogs | ɴᴏᴡ ɴᴏ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ, ᴄʜɪʟᴅ, ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ( ᴏᴘᴇɴ )

Entry tags:

ɴᴏᴡ ɴᴏ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ, ᴄʜɪʟᴅ, ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ( ᴏᴘᴇɴ )

Who: alaybe stone + you!
Where: the tea room + the gardens
When: October 11th + 12th
Rating: pg-13 for now, will update if needed. mostly for potential talk of westeroi-horror.
Summary: alayne sings a song while sewing and later on deals with the effects.
The Story:

OCTOBER 11TH

[ the signs reading 'honesty' have frightened her because alayne lives on lies.

she had told herself, time and time again, the lies were always kindly meant. always for protection and never to harm and if it so, then they are not a wrong thing on the whole. even here, far away in wonderland, alayne stone has to exist so sansa stark might yet be safe. wonderland calls forward souls from so many realms; the queen might be one of them or her men, or tyrion.

she doesn't feel about him as she does about his sister or her men but that is too complex and she tries, tries very hard, not to think of it.

she takes her sewing to the tea room, trying to push away the memories of the girl who came before, the silly bird, pretty but otherwise unaware to the world around her.

the song comes unnoticed and uncalled before she could control it. needle and thread move and so do her lips. it's not one she heard or had known before ( 'margaret, are you grieving over goldengrove unleaving?' ) but something about it speaks true to alayne ( 'ah! as the heart grows older; it will come to such sights colder' ), speaks true and loud. she might have dreamed it up ( 'it is the blight man was born for; it is Mmrgaret you mourn for' ) or perhaps wonderland had taught her. either way the words leave her lips and they form a song, sung in a hushed, tender voice for any passer by to hear.

October 12th

[ the next day finds her near in tears.

the song comes at times without her consent or attention and its words are burned into her mind and alayne cannot seem to escape it no matter where she goes. the word 'honesty' seems to mock her from the walls at the mansion so she escapes to the gardens; long hair in a single braid today.

she is not careful in her haste, does not cover her tears well. she can be found there most of the day, sitting by the fountain or on one of the benches. her body language speaks of sheer fear, huddled into herself as she is, trying to make herself as unnoticed as possible.

( where can she go but here? ) ]

INSPIRATION MUSIC

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An event like this, that forced honesty out in the form of words, was one Minato didn't think he'd ever get used to. He thought he should keep to himself, but he ended up having to sing whatever he was kept inside under lock and key. He was good at that. But Wonderland had a way of revealing those secrets, just like it had with extracting memories.

He saw Alayne in the tearoom, though he heard her first before seeing her.

"Hi." Minato smiled a little. He had only heard her, but her song had ended once he had entered the room. He hoped too then that during this event he hadn't been disturbing her. "... You have a nice voice."

I - I am hardly a singer. Forgive me.

[ she rises to bow, nearly dropping her embodiment in her haste to do so. she looks, for a moment, as frazzled as her mind is but the moment passes and alayne is all grace again as she rises from her curtsy. ]

I must have lost myself in my work. I - would you with me?

[Minato bowed his head slightly to her since she bowed to him. He had to remember that she was so polite, so he wanted to return the favor.]

If I can stay with you to watch you work, I'd like that.

If it pleases you.

[ if he is here, perhaps she would not be so lost in her mind and the song will be kept at the back of her mind like so many other memories ( winterfell, her lady mother braiding her hair, sansa stark ).

she sits back down, looks down at her work. ]

it is a shawl. at times I can be cold when night falls. it's not truly my very best.

[ mostly because she's been so distracted while making it ]

I - tried for flowers. Honeysuckles.

It looks nice. You're really talented.

[And it really did. Minato had a friend in school who was good with making things like that, even something like a kimono. Minato always did like seeing other people's handicrafts.]

If I knew you got cold at night, I could've brought a scarf or something like it for you.

[ she smiles, dips her head in shy happiness. it's been a long while since her stitch-work had won compliments as it had for sansa in winterfell. septa mordane said sansa's embroidery was second to none.

she thinks often of winterfell and sansa but today the memories are closer than ever. ]

It is alright, I dare not complain. You are good for thinking of me.

I should bring you one anyway. It might not be as nice-looking as your own work, but it'll work before you finish your shawl.

[It was the least he could do for her.]

[ a smile tugs at her lips again ]

You show me too much kindness. Truly, I cannot hope to repay you. You have been very good to me from the moment I stepped into this odd realm. You -

[ tentatively, shyly ]

You are a good friend.

You are to me too. That means you don't have to repay me for anything.

[She was always so nice to him too, always willing to listen and was patient with him too. What more could he ask for in a friend?]

[Steve has done this whole song and dance (literally) once already. He's baffled that this has happened yet again, and if there's anything he can do about it, he won't be launching into a ballad anywhere public.

So for the most part, he's stayed in his room, which means that he's sung a little to Dodger and to Bucky, but it could be a whole lot worse than that. He's kept his phone out of reach for the past few days, even, because he knows that it has a tendency to turn on and record when he least expects it.

He's too antsy to just hole up in his room for days at a time, though, and so Steve decides to get some fresh air. He takes Dodger with him, and the puppy's trotting along happily and taking in all the familiar sights and smells as Steve walks out the front doors of the mansion. He's got his hood pulled up because he'd really prefer to keep conversation to a minimum, but then he spots someone familiar on one of the benches in the gardens, and he stops short.

Alayne's seated there, doing everything in her power to blend into the background, but her eyes are red from crying and she looks legitimately terrified. Of what, Steve's not sure, as there aren't any other people around, at least not in any obvious way. But fears are not that cut and dry, are they? Dodger shuffles around impatiently underfoot, but after only a moment of consideration, Steve approaches Alayne. He doesn't sit next to her just yet, but the puppy draws forward and sniffs at her shoes.]

Alayne... what's going on? [There's no point in acting like nothing's wrong.] Is there anything I can do?

[ alayne had heard of people going mad at king's landing. at winterfell, her lady mother would never have let sansa hear of such terrible things but in king's landing there was no one to shield sansa from the truth of the world.

she did not know how it felt, however. westeros had broken sansa but her mind was clear before it was shaped as alayne's. she thinks this may be how it feels. the words to the song are so painfully etched into her mind despite her knowing she has never heard it before. it is beyond her and stronger than her and alayne tries to push it away but it seems to always be in a corner of her mind.

steve's voice brings her back to the here and the now and she looks up, her hands shaking in her lap. ]

N-no. Forgive me. I have forgotten myself.

[ sansa. and alayne both. ]

[What does she think will happen if she tells him the truth? Steve frowns, and as much as she might want him to go away and leave her to her brooding, he can't do that.

So he takes a seat and makes a motion with his hand so that Dodger lays down near his feet. He may be a puppy forever, but they've still managed to train him and he can probably sense that this isn't play time.]

There's nothing to forgive you for. Everyone's allowed to cry sometimes.

[Steve tends to hold back his tears, to ball it all up and pretend it's not there, but everyone has a breaking point. Especially someone as young as Alayne, who's been thrust into a situation like this.]

If you need to talk about it, I'm here. And if not... well, I've been told I'm decent company. [He smiles ruefully.]

You have much to forgive me for, I -

[ margaret, are you grieving over goldengrove unleaving? and sansa once had, she was a girl with bright eyes who believed the world was naught but a pretty song and the sight of king's landing in its heat and beauty was enough to make her think her own would be a happy one.

silly little bird whose wings were chopped. they had taken lady first and everything else later and now she was all alone in this world as she had been in westeros. my family was given to me to be taken again and I lied to them, it was my own doing.

she becomes smaller, somehow, recoils into herself as if burned by something.

honesty, the signs read and the song plays in her head ( it is margaret you mourn for and she wants to cry for sansa stark and for alayne stone and for how they both lose their family twice because of lies. ) ]

I lied to you, to everyone. I did not mean to, I did so only to be safe. He -

[ littlefinger. petyr. my lord father. the man who stole a kiss from me. ]

It was not ill meant. He said it was to keep me safe and now wonderland has punished me for it.

[Alayne looks like she wants to melt into the pavement, and she probably would if that were possible. Everyone's had low moments where it seems like it would be easier to disappear -- or Steve had, at least, when he'd been her age.

But once she starts to speak, it's like a floodgate opens and more words spill out. About lies and punishments and Steve's frown grows as he reaches out and gingerly places a hand on her shoulder.]

Wait, slow down, let's start over. [One thing at a time. Steve raises his eyebrows at her and smiles, to make sure she knows he isn't angry.]

What did you lie about? If it's not important for me to know, you don't have to tell me. [Everyone's allowed some secrets. Steve's been burned by others keeping things from him, but this is a different case. He won't make a teenage girl bear her heart to him unless she wants to.] And who's he? [Steve gets the feeling that whoever it is, this person Alayne's mentioned is the real issue here.]

The girl who was before. I - my name.

[ and it is odd to speak of it, odd to even speak a name she hadn't dared to utter for so long. alayne shifts a bit, tears reach her eyes but never leave them, holding back seems to be in her nature and the more she remembers sansa the more she remembers how practiced she was in hiding away her misery and disguise it with love of her tormentor. she looks down at her hands. ]

Lady Sansa Stark - of Winterfell. Sister to Arya Stark who were once here, niece to lady Lyanna Stark who was also here; though they have only known Alayne and I have never - I've never told them the truth. Alayne Stone she - I had to be her. I have to be her. To be safe. Sansa Stark is not a name one speaks freely in my land and as this one brings forth so many people -

[ she falters for a moment. ]

Alayne kept Sansa safe from those who wished to harm her, there are many. The man who saved Sansa from them had gave her Alayne and I have been Alayne, she is the only one I can be.

[ torn between them both, between sansa and alayne who is as true as her - she is not certain, for a moment, who is the one speaking before she lifts her head with something akin to pride in the only thing that she still has. ]

I'm Lady Sansa Stark, of Winterfell, whose sigil is the direwolf. Bran - I did not know he was alive. All the rest are dead and those who killed them would kill Sansa - they would have my head if they could. I have not spoken of this to Arya and my Lady Aunt and it is my fault they are gone. Wonderland is punishing for my lies and now, I will never see them again.

[Her name. Not Alayne, but Sansa. She'd hidden her true identity, but only for the sake of her safety. Steve doesn't know who or what she's had to hide from, but given that some of her other family members have already lost their lives, the threat is obviously very real.

Steve realizes that she must have been separated from her family for a long while, if her own sister hadn't recognized her here. Lyanna Stark... Steve had spoken with her, once. She'd look so much like Peggy, and Steve had been kind of amused by that last name at the time. She's been gone for a while, though, and Alayne -- no, Sansa believes that's her fault.

It must have been painful to have family so close and not be able to reveal herself to them. Steve doesn't feel betrayed by the lies. If anything, he's got pity for Sansa and all of the horrific things she's had to endure.]

Listen to me. [Steve shifts on the bench so that he's facing Sansa more directly.] Wonderland does what it wants. We don't know why it sends people back home, and assuming it's your fault won't do anything but make things more painful. You wanted to survive and stay safe -- no one can judge you for that.

[Sansa Stark of Winterfell. Steve doesn't plan to spread that information around, but he'll always call her by her real name now, if she'll let him.] Sansa, why do these people want you dead? Are any of them here?

[Because there's no way Steve's letting anyone get near a traumatized teenage girl.]

[ he calls her sansa and she looks up at that, almost startled by the truth of it but she doesn't protest nor does she correct him. she is sansa and she is alayne. torn between the two, yes but still. she cannot deny sansa anymore; denying her had brought this heartache on her to begin with. ]

they are not here.

[ as for the 'why' she doesn't know where to begin. she isn't sure she knows the answer, not really, the 'why' everything went so wrong as it did. coming to the south had seemed so wonderful and sweet at first and it got twisted and ruined. ]

they named my father traitor to the king. he wasn't. my lord father he was - he would never betray anyone, the king has been his friend. He was here, Robert Baratheon, the king of Westeros, he was here and he had cared for those of house Stark out of love for my father. The Queen she - and her son, they named him traitor and they took his head. I was to wed the queen's son he.

[ she cannot even say his name. she can only remember him pale and choking and it makes her sick. ]

he took his head and he mounted on a spike and he made me look at it. they've killed my lord father and my lady mother and my brother robb and if they ever come here, they will kill me too.

[It's glaringly obvious that she hasn't had anyone call her Sansa in a long time. She's probably missed it, hearing the sound of her own name in someone else's voice. Maybe even getting to speak it for herself. If anything, Steve's relieved that this event has caused her to come forward with it.

The details that she blurts out, about traitors and kings and beheadings, it still sounds like something Steve would read or watch, as opposed to an actual person's life. But it is Sansa's life. It sounds like there's a lot more to the story, but the crux of it is that her family has been targeted despite the fact that they did nothing wrong, and Sansa thinks she's next.

She'd been made to look at her own father's detached head. That would be enough to traumatize anyone for life.

Steve doesn't know who these people are, but he already has an idea of what he would do to them if they ever showed up here. Sansa's scared, but she doesn't need to be. Not while Steve is here.

He leans in toward her and clasps his hands on both of her shoulders, then finds her eyes, even if they are glassy with tears she's holding back.] Sansa, if any of these people do show up, you need to stay away from them. Don't let them know you're here. You come find me or Bucky and let us know who they are, and we'll deal with them. All right?

[This is not a battle that Sansa should have to fight, and honestly, Steve is just so sick of bullies. To prey on a teenage girl like this is about the lowest of the low in his opinion.]

They would never know of Sansa, she is not here, only Alayne.

[ she nods. she remembers all what littlefinger had taught her. sansa stark is gone, there is only ever alayne who is older than her, with darker hair. alayne who is only a baseborn girl who would not interest anyone.

but the queen.

she thinks of queen cersei and for a moment, panic seizes her. she would not be able to fool her. the queen would look at her and she would see sansa and she would call for her head and if steve or bucky would try to interfere for sansa stark's cause - ]

No, you must not.

[ she says it and meets his eyes, shaking her head. ]

They have killed my lord Father and my Lady Mother and my brothers. They would kill you too and him. They surely will if they are able.

Wouldn't they recognize you?

[Or has Sansa been in hiding as Alayne for that long, that she's aged enough to not resemble her younger self? It seems like even then, someone clever enough would be able to put the pieces together.

If she wants to keep up her cover just in case, then Steve understands, but he also doesn't think she should assume it would be enough.

She's a sweet, caring girl, which is why she's worried on his behalf. When she expresses her concerns, Steve just shakes his head.] That assumes they're able. I don't let any bully get away with this kind of thing, and I definitely don't go down without a fight.

[His lips tug up into a smile and he tightens his grip on her shoulders, though not to any painful degree.] I'll make sure they never hurt you. I promise. [If Steve has to take the hits meant for her, he'll do that too. He's resilient, he's been altered for that purpose, he'll jump in front of her every time.]

Some might. Others might not.

[ The Queen will, she is certain; but mayhaps not her men. they would expect a three and ten girl with auburn hair and will see a girl taller, claiming to be four-and-ten with dark hair.

some of the queen's men would see alayne; the queen, however, will certainly see sansa. alayne looks down at her hands for a moment, tries not to humor the thought that she herself has little notion of where sansa ends and alayne begins. after a moment, she smiles a bit. ]

then you are my sworn banner-man.

[ a jape. but men who vow themselves to ladies are exactly that. ]

were I a queen, I would name you knight.

[The smile on Sansa's face shows that she doesn't mean it seriously, but Steve doesn't really mind the title. He laughs and shrugs his shoulders, pulling his hands away from her finally and then splaying them out to the sides.]

You can call me what you want. [She can also be a queen, if that's what she wants. Steve's not particularly picky about titles, although the rest of his world is in regards to him. He's always going to be Captain there, which is fine, but it doesn't need to work that way in Wonderland.] Just know that you can call me or come knocking on my door if you ever feel threatened here.

[Because no one should be made to feel that way, least of all a girl as kind and caring as Sansa Stark.]

Edited 2014-11-09 19:12 (UTC)

[Just now, Elsa is being careful about where she goes and who she talks to. She doesn't exactly have real secrets anymore, just things she would rather not tell everyone she meets, things that might embarrass her or cause people to fear her. The only truly good thing about coming here is that the near-disaster she caused isn't commonly known: if she's careful, it's a completely fresh start. But she's been in Wonderland long enough now to understand what a lot of talk about "honesty" might bode. (And what if her powers begin to manifest themselves against her will? What if that happens one day? Not just a lack of control, but Wonderland controlling them... it would be terrible.)

One of the tea rooms seems like it will be safe enough, in terms of low traffic in comparison to the kitchen or the dining room. She'll probably be able to get in, get a snack, and get out without passing too many people.

She doesn't hear the singing until she opens the door.]

Oh! Excuse me.

[She bites her lower lip, indecisive, before coming into the room -- she really is hungry, and ducking out so obviously now would be rude.]

I don't mean to interrupt your singing. Is it a famous song?

My Lady -

[ she rises to bow. elsa is nobility and though she carries herself differently than most noble ladies alayne had encountered ( more shy, reserved, less haughty and certainly not vain ) alayne respects her as one. her bow is graceful and low. ]

I - would not know, my lady. I fear I know little of it, it simply came to me though I am certain I have never heard it before.

[ it sounds mad. it sounds odd. ]

Forgive me, I know it makes little sense.

[The Once-ler is out in the gardens. It's become almost a habit for him to be there daily now, ever since he returned to Wonderland. He strolls slowly, taking everything in as if it's the first time, but it feels almost like a compulsion sometimes. He needs to make sure it's all still there. Sometimes he fears he'll wake up and all the trees and flowers will be gone.

It isn't long before he spots Alayne there, curled up and...has she been crying? The once-ler can't tell from where he's standing, but he hesitates. He's not sure he would be the most welcome person right now - he never seems to be very good at comforting people. Once he works up the nerve though, he tentatively approaches her, looking worried. He makes sure to halt himself a respectful distance away. After all, he doesn't want to startle her.]

Alayne? ...What's wrong? You alright?

[Clearly not, but it seems right to ask anyway. She's such a sweet girl that he can't even picture what might have freaked her out this much.]

Once-ler.

[ she rises for a quick bow, remembers her manners despite her disposition. she is almost ashamed that he had to see her crying. she remembers sansa stark and how adapt she had been at hiding her tears. she looks down at the ground for a moment before nodding her head a bit. ]

Fine. Forgive me. I simply - I forgot I was in company.

[ and not in the privacy of he room. by choice, the silence frightens her. ]

[Sometimes Alayne is so polite it hurts. It's actually physically painful to watch someone go out of their way to be so nice so someone like him, and he's never sure if he's reacting right or politely enough in return. And it feels ridiculous because she's still a kid and she's that kind and gentle. He wonders how people like her can actually exist, people who are just that nice from the start.

The Once-ler lifts his hands and shakes them palms out, the semi-universal silent gesture for "Woah, hey, you don't have to get up; it's okay" but she does anyway. She seems a lot calmer than when he first saw her, but that doesn't change the fact that he did see her.]

No, no - I mean, you weren't, really. I'm the one who went and interrupted like a jerk. Uh. ...Sorry, I just. You seemed like you were crying, so...

[So he came to check on her, but he's starting to think that maybe he shouldn't have intruded. He's still awkward about trying to be a decent person, and if she's really sad then she'd probably rather have someone around who can actually make her feel better. Or at least, he can't help assuming she probably would.]

[ sansa has hid her tears and her bruises, had swore her love to joffrey after each blow and each insult. alayne may pity sansa but she does appreciate her strength. she was strong, she tried; she tried to be strong as her lady mother. as strong as catelyn stark who had braided her hair and did not want to send her to to the south.

they said they threw catelyn stark naked to the river and the thought makes her cringe as if she has been hit.

she must not cry. ]

you have been here longer than I, can I ask you something?

[The Once-ler nods. He's always a little anxious when someone asks something like this of him, when someone feels like they can rely on him, but he doesn't know what else he could do for her.]

Yeah. ...Yeah, sure Alayne. You can ask me anything. What is it?

[Maybe he shouldn't have offered "anything" but he has been here a long time. Maybe it's a Wonderland thing.]

Does Wonderland punishes people? if - they have done something bad.

[ for surely, lying to her own kin has been bad. she can clearly see it now, surely the queen sought to punish her for it. ]

Can Wonderland punish them for what they have done?

[ she wants to believe this is not her doing, she wants to believe her foolishness wasn't the reason aunt lyanna and arya has been sent to their certain deaths. she wants to believe but she finds it so hard it nearly chokes her. ]

I...

[With the look on his face, you'd think that she asked if Wonderland was punishing him personally. Fear clouds him for a moment.

It would explain a lot, wouldn't it?]

...Even if it could, I don't think you've got anything to worry about. You're a good kid. I mean, everyone makes mistakes, but I can't picture you doing anything so bad an entire world would punish you.

[He's an entirely different story though - he probably deserves it a dozen times over.]

This world makes little sense.

[ she admits it rather helplessly. no, she certainly hadn't done something so terrible. her lies were kindly meant, she had never harmed anyone, not ever. she has tried, had always tried, to be good. ]

Mayhaps it merely punishes one even for little things they have not meant to do.

[He shakes his head.]

Nah. I don't think so. This place isn't great, but if it's punishing us it's punishing everyone, whether they've done something or not.

[Usually all the bad stuff hits everyone pretty equally from what he's seen. If one event isn't that bad for you in particular, another one will come along and make up for it.]

Plus, if this place was punishing us based on things we've done, it would be even worse for the people here who have done really terrible things, but...I think it mostly hits everyone the same.

[If they were being punished for bad things they've done, he would know it by now. There was a time when he just hadn't cared if he was good or not, and for that long stretch alone where he ruined everything around him, he probably would have been first in line to be punished by Wonderland.]

Are there.

[ it's a stupid question because of course there are; but alayne has been somewhat sheltered in this place from the people who have performed crimes one would call terrible. she has been sheltered in a way that would have been impossible in westeros, not with the memories of joffrey, of dontos falling dead into the water, of aunt lysa falling through the moon door- ]

are there people here who have done terrible things?

[The Once-ler is shocked for a moment that she would ask so directly. Then, he bows his head and looks away. He can't meet her eyes.]

...Yeah. There are.

[He would know.

There an awkward silence for a moment, but then he's filled with panic, because what if she asks more about that? Who's terrible, and how does he know? Nervously, he steps back and crosses his arms in front of him like he's cold.]

I-I should...I should probably go. You know, stuff to do and...things. But I hope you feel better, Alayne. Whatever happened...you. You probably didn't do anything big enough to deserve it.

[And then, with that, he turns and starts to leave.]

[ Bucky usually passes the tea room by, but the sound of soft singing from inside catches his attention. When he glances inside and sees that it's Alayne, he steps in and leans a hip against the door frame. ]

Morning, Alayne. Hope I'm not interrupting anything? [ He inclines his head to indicate her sewing. ] Maybe I shoulda' brought the snacks this time.

[ alayne is startled for only half a moment, a quick tensing of her shoulders and then she looks back and something in her relaxes, a soft smile forms on her lips. ]

You have been saved, the room supplies them quite regularly; though not always the same ones.

[ for alayne, they're always lemon cakes. but she had seen it changes so rapidly for other people. ]

[ Bucky notices the quick tension, and it's not the first time. The life of an orphan isn't easy, no matter where she comes from, but the way she tenses up so often makes him wonder. ]

Lucky me. [ He smiles, all easy charm, and comes over to lift a cape from the table. ] What were you singing just now, anyway?

I don't know.

[ said honestly, there is a tiny frown on her brow. ]

It simply - I knew the words as if I have heard it before but I am rather certain I never had.

[ it sounds mad and she looks up at him. ]

I'm sorry. I know it sounds odd but I do not know. I am not a singer, either way.

[ though septa mordane always praised sansa for her singing. ]

[ Bucky settles on the arm of the chair across from her and shakes his head. ]

I dunno, you've got a great singing voice. [ It's a passing comment, like it should be as obvious as the sky was blue. He has the lemon cake in his hand poised about two inches from his mouth, but the small frown on his face makes it obvious he's lost in thought and half-forgotten he picked it up. ] You know, it's probably Wonderland in that case... That kinda thing has happened around here before. In fact, come to think of it, we're due for a little something. Did the words mean anything at all to you?

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