entrancelogs | Save yourself, serve yourself

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Save yourself, serve yourself | Open

Who: The Once-ler [

thneedifestdestiny] and OPEN
Where: In the Shelter
When: The duration of the event, May 15th - 18th
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The Once-ler has to scavenge for food and deal with intense paranoia. Or, as he'd call it back home, a totally normal weekend.
The Story:

[It's a little concerning that the Once-ler isn't completely lost about what to do in an apocalyptic-seeming scenario. Who would even look at the Once-ler and assume he knows anything about surviving anywhere.

First order of business is getting into this vending machine he found. He woke up alone and he hasn't seen a single other person yet, but he did find a heavy broken pipe with a sharp bend in it two-thirds of the way down. Without much hesitation at all, he lifts the pipe up and swings it like an axe and the glass rains down everywhere. The sound of it echos in the otherwise silent hall. Then, once he knocks most of the glass away, he slips off his ridiculously long gloves and starts filling them up with as many snacks as he can fit in them.

Of course this would be the event where he gets caught not wearing his only Thneed before it starts. He could've just knotted that into a bag, but noooo, that would be too easy!

The drink machine is a little trickier, since it doesn't have a glass front, but with a little effort he's able to jimmy it open and he nicks all the water bottles from it. He can only cram a few inside the gloves, but he has a plan. He lays the gloves on the ground with the hands pointing in opposite directions. Then, he ties off the openings (leaving a good amount of room at the end) and ties the two gloves together, elbow to middle finger on both ends. When he's done he has a very, very stupid looking sash, but he also has a way to carry his supplies and keep his hands free...just in case. He uses the remaining fingers to secure two more water bottles to the outside of his sash.

Aside from the dumb sash and the cold weather, he's done all of this before. Long after the Thneed factory was abandoned, he broke into the vending machines in the workers' breakroom and raided them for the last sweets he thought he'd ever have. Back when he was in charge, he wouldn't have even associated with the guy who knew where the keys would be.

If anyone run into him on the first day, he might be willing to share some of his supplies. Try your luck. But, as the event progresses and he grows more and more paranoid of everything and everyone around him, he won't be letting anyone within three and a half feet of him. He's very, very painfully aware that he isn't much of a fighter and he doesn't stand a chance against anyone who tries to come at him with magic, but he sure can swing a lead pipe if he has to.]

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[Amethyst hasn't eaten. It's not a big deal because she's a gem and gems don't have to eat actually but it feels weird. It's usually something she does to stave off boredom but in a way it makes her feel good as well. And she's feeling particularly not good right now. She feels... weird. Like there's some nagging fear at the back of her head, and she isn't even sure what it is for.

So when she sees this particular scene in front of her, a man gathering food and drink from a vending machine, she doesn't think 'I'm a gem so I should leave this for humans to eat.' She only thinks 'I want to eat too.']

You have food! Come on, give some here! [She waves at him.]

[At the moment she calls out, the Once-ler has his whole arm buried deep in the vending machine, trying to get the last bag of chips in the row. The stupid thing is stuck in one of the metal curls. He has one lanky leg up the broken frame as leverage, and it's a very silly sight.]

Ugh, can't you go find your own vending machine to break into?

[With one last good tug, he pulls the bag free (and actually manages to keep it from exploding in the process) and looks victorious! ...For about a second. Then he remembers that oh, right. He's supposed to be trying to be less greedy, and there's an entire vending machine worth of food there. He looks from the bag of chips to the strange purple girl, then back at the chips. Finally, with a resigned sigh, he tosses them her way.]

Here. Take 'em. I have plenty.

[She looks very unimpressed when he brushes her off, and folds her arms, watching him struggle. Haha, look at him having a hard time. That's what he gets for not sharing.

But he actually stops, and tosses her the bag of chips, and-- okay, so maybe he's not so bad after all. But he still kind of deserved to struggle.]

Haha, sweet. Chips. [And, rather than ration the bag a little like any human who actually needed to eat would do, she opens it up and grabs the biggest handful that she can and shoves it right into her mouth. And again. And again. She's eaten half the bag in a few seconds. Her powers are terrifying.]

Does the mansion do stuff like this a lot? I was kinda hoping for another trip to the hot springs, but this is like... the opposite of a hot springs. [Noisy chewing interspersed in her words.] It sucks, actually.

[The Once-ler makes a face, but ultimately he's not as disturbed as he could be. He's seen a bear push and entire stick of butter into its mouth after eating the entire contents of his fridge so it'll take a lot more than that to alarm him.]

Yeah, no. This is a lot more typical of Wonderland. I've been here for like, ever, and I'm pretty sure I can count the good things this place has done to us on one hand. It's kinda terrible.

[He stops his looting for a minute and opens a candy bar for himself. Might as well, right?]

I keep hearing they have something to do with memories. Soooo, in other words, someone had a hot spring like that at home, and some other jerk had this dump.

[Wonder who that could possibly be?]

[She groans at the information.] Ugh, this place suuuucks! I thought it was cool at first but it's stopped being fun like yesterday. [She pours the rest of the chips directly into her mouth with finality, like she's so done with Wonderland's shit she's gotta eat all these chips. She throws the bag on the ground when she's done with it.]

Maybe we should find the jerk who's responsible for this place and dunk them in the garbage. [Like you didn't dunk the empty bag of chips...]

[Were they literally anywhere else the Once-ler might say something about the littering, but he got a look outside. This place is already a snowy wasteland beyond saving. Anything they drop here isn't going to make a difference at all. He does give her a bit of a judging look for it though.]

This dumb place loses its appeal pretty quick. It's alright enough to live in when nothing's going on, but it's impossible to know what events it's gonna pitch at us.

[Still, even with awful events it's better than his own world. He's complaining, but only in the way someone might complain about the weather. It is what it is. And maybe he should be a little more sympathetic about the fact that they can't control what events happen, and that whoever this event game from probably didn't want it, but...eh. Wishing harm on them feels better in the moment. He laughs.]

Well, it probably wouldn't do much, but... [He shrugs.] It'd also probably be really satisfying at this point.

[She's a litterer. You gonna make something of it, Once-ler?

Amethyst hits her fist against her open palm in a show of toughness.]

That's it. I'm done with this Wonderland place. I'm gonna take it apart and see if there really is a gem powering it.

[Amethyst does like to complain too, but more than that she prefers doing something about her complaints. And she's still certain there's a gem at the heart of this whole fiasco. It's just a matter of finding it. Though it might be harder to find while the mansion is replaced by this facility...]

I just really want to put someone in the garbage right now. Do you know who it is? [SHE'S HONESTLY SERIOUS ABOUT THIS.]

A gem? What? [He laughs a little. Apparently he missed any sort of gem crash course he could have gotten when she first turned up.] Why would a gem be powering any of this? It's all "magic" and stuff. Heck if I understand any of it though.

[He twiddles his fingers at the word magic though. He knows it's real, but he still thinks it's a little ridiculous sometimes, like when it forces them into freezing cold shelters or whatever. But he shrugs when asked who it belongs to.]

Beats me. Whoever it is probably isn't going to say anything though. I know if this were my event I'd definitely be keeping my mouth shut.

Gems are like magic! [At least, they are to humans. To gems, they're just a normal aspect of life, running on their own form of science.] They do stuff like this. Maybe not exactly like this, all of them are different, but there's gotta be one somewhere. Ugh, nobody believes me, but you'll know when I find it. I'll show you! Then we can all go home.

[She thinks about the subject of whose event this might be, but then seemingly makes a decision.]

Maybe we can just find someone who looks like this could be their event and do it to them.

[Did you know Amethyst is a good guy? A protector of humans? Did you think that was mutually exclusive from being terrible?]

[The Once-ler frowns a little. It's not that he doesn't believe her, but...]

...Ehhh. If you can just make this place not-so-awful, I'd be alright with that. I'm not too keen on going home.

[He doesn't elaborate on why, but aside from all the awful stuff about it, Wonderland is the better option right now. He just tries to casually change the subject.]

Hm. I'd be alright with that. If it's not the right person, it could be a warning to whoever the event really belongs to.

Really?

[Hmm. Oh well. She shrugs. Better not press it. She knows what it's like to have mixed feelings about "home".]

Eh, well, maybe you can just come to my place instead.

Heheh, yeah! Watch out, event-maker, we're comin' for ya!

[Yeah, that's what happens when you ruin everything around you. But the Once-ler shrugs.]

Can't be any worse than this, right?

[He assumes not, if she actually wants to go back. He is definitely on board with Operation Garbage though. Vengeance just sounds right today for some reason, like they deserve it for making everyone so paranoid and twitchy.]

Ha, yeah! They'll get what's coming to them for dumping us in this dump in the first place.

No, it's way better! I stay in this temple by the beach and we protect the city from monsters and stuff. Uh, don't worry about the monsters! They're no match for me. [Said very proudly.

Vengeance is sweet, Once-ler. So sweet.]

They'll get slam dumped in the dump!

[He raises an eyebrow at her, just a bit skeptically. But...gems are magic apparently, so whatever. Maybe there are monsters too. Maybe she just throws people in trash cans for a living.]

...Right. Sure. I guess that'd be fun though? I've never been to a beach before - outside of here, anyway.

[A pause, as he remembers they're in a frozen tundra.] ...Not here-here. Back at the mansion.

The whole city's on the beach. People visit all the time just to relax and have fun and stuff. You can swim or do volleyball or whatever, it's all good.

I mean. My friends are kinda jerks so they might say you can't stay with us, but they let Steven keep Lion.. I'm sure they'll be fine with it if we just explain it to them.

Is Lion...an actual Lion?

[This is an important question. He's lived with a lot of wild animals before, but he might have to draw the line at lions.

There's one other important question too, and he tries to ask it as casually as possible.]

And, uh. Are there...trees, in your world?

Yeah, Lion's a lion. He's cool though. He doesn't even leave half-eaten corpses around or anything. Actually... I've never even seen him eat? [Huh. Weird.]

But yeah, of course there are trees! Tons of 'em. They're pretty much everywhere. Heh, what kind of world wouldn't have trees?

[So, Lion sneakily eats his dinner whole and leaves no trace behind then. Got it.

He doesn't comment on that, but he does laugh awkwardly and half-heartedly. He's normally more open about what happened but...right now he's not quite so trusting.] Ha. Right...a world with no trees. That'd be super weird.

[Ha. Ha. Ha...]

[Amethyst is smart enough to notice his discomfort with the subject of trees. But she doesn't comment on it, knowing when it's best to let subjects lie. She has her own subjects that bother her. She knows what it's like.]

Yeah. [And she drops it there.]

So you done this before? [Gesturing to the makeshift sash full of snacks and water.]

Yeah, once. I mean, not this specifically-- [He gestures vaguely at the sash.] --but I've got to be kinda resourceful to get by where I'm from.

[His world's just sounding better and better, isn't it?]

[Yeah, his world sounds real dandy.]

Is your world like this? [And a gasp.] Wait, has this been your event all along? Am I gonna have to put you in the garbeage!?

What? No! This is nothing like my world! I-It's not my event!

[...Except for all the ways where he already admitted that this is totally like his world. Suddenly though, he looks a lot more uncomfortable with her now that he's the one who might get thrown in the garbage.]

Yeah, except that's what you'd say... if this were your event. [She steps closer to him, arms raised and poised to grab him.] Don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm just gonna--

[--And she tries to grab him in a bear hug.]

[The Once-ler starts to back up, arms raised as if trying to calm a wild animal, but he's too slow. She's already grabbing for him and even though he tries to stagger back she's much too strong for him. He struggles, but it's kind of hopeless. He's too skinny and lanky to put up much of a fight this way.]

Let go of me! Don't put me in the garbage!

[She's got him in a bear hug, and she lifts him above the ground easily. Thankfully, there's a garbage can nearby, near the vending machine for practicality reasons. She kicks over the can, which knocks off the top, and stuffs him inside in one swift motion, then quickly turns it back upright. She finishes by neatly setting the top back onto the can and dusting off her hands after a job well done.

It's probably mostly candy wrappers and bottles in there, but who knows, maybe there's some treasure.]

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Save yourself, serve yourself | Open

may 16th

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