[OPEN | NARRATIVE] i'm starting with the man in the mirror

[punful]

Who: Sans and the Sanses and YOU
Where: The courtyard
When: September 1st, morning
Rating: PG-13 for language, violence and generalized self-hatred
Summary: Two smol skeletons beat the shit out of each other
The Story:

Sans is studying the invitation that came under his door when he hears a tapping sound from the direction of the wall. That's pretty much the first indication that something is very wrong, because there's nothing over there. 4 is curled up asleep on the mattress, and Sans is pretty sure that there are no mice in the walls.

He looks over to see that his mirror has repaired itself, and to see himself leaning casually against the mirror's frame. His other self grins widely at him.

"well, come on. you didn't even answer." His other self raps against the frame again. "knock knock."

Sans tucks the invitation into his pocket. Guess he'll have to check it out later.

"who's there?"

"sans."

He snorts. "sans who?"

"sansless violence."

Sans considers that for a second and nods. "okay, that was a pretty good one."

"right?"

"not the biggest fan of that sort of morbid humor, though. leaves a bad taste on my tongue."

The Mirror's grin is wide with barely-contained, vicious glee.

"sure. because you're boring. hey, look what i can do." The Mirror sticks his arm all the way through the mirror, right into Sans's room. On the back of his hand is a metal plate with WDG - 1 S engraved on the surface.

Sans gives the hand and the Mirror himself an appraising look.

"neat trick."

The Mirror steps through the frame, as casual as you like. Sans keeps his hands carefully in his pockets. He glances from the Mirror to the bed, where 4 is still sleeping.

"so, i'm not one to pussyfoot around the issue, but uh. if i leave, will you hurt my cat?"

The Mirror looks offended. "jeez. what kind of monster do you think i am? i like that cat. i figure i'll look after him once i'm through with you."

Sans nods. "okay. cool."

He teleports. At the same moment, he reappears out in the courtyard. He has time enough to notice that there's an entire second mansion nearby before the Mirror Sans teleports as well. The Mirror lands right in front of Sans, up in his business, hand outstretched to catch the front of Sans's hoodie. The Mirror jerks him forward, grin widening even further.

"you didn't really think i wouldn't be able to follow you on a shortcut, did you?"

Sans gives an expansive shrug. "i figured it was worth a shot. do we really have to do this? we're supposed to be lazy, yanno. fighting is no fun. it's so much work."

"sure. but you and i both know that sometimes it can be..." The Mirror raises his free hand and there's a horrible, rending sound. A gigantic skull appears in midair above the Mirror's hand. It's enormous, at least four feet long, and shaped like a cross between a dog and a dragon.

The Mirror's left eyesocket is ablaze with an eye-shaped flame of yellow-blue.

"Incredibly. Satisfying."

The Gaster Blaster's eyesockets overflow with light, its mouth opens and it fires, a booming, searing blast of white light. Sans teleports at the same moment, right out of his Mirror's grip. The blast devastates a patch of grass and flowers, tearing a line through the dirt, but otherwise hits nothing.

Sans reappears behind his Mirror. The Gaster Blaster vanishes.

"yeesh. pulling out the big guns already?"

The Mirror looks back at him over his shoulder. "something something strongest attack first, right?"

Sans taps his left eyesocket. "you left your eye on. that's gonna wear you out, you know."

The Mirror grits his teeth and raises a hand again. "don't give me tips on how to kill you."

A line of bones springs up out of the ground like white flowers and races toward Sans. Sans dodges left, sidestepping easily. Hard to change direction on those once you've set them down; very easy to dodge.

"what? not just gonna stand there and take it? but you're always beating yourself up, sans. just let it happen and die. it'd make you even with papyrus, at least."

The Mirror starts to circle him, but Sans doesn't even move except to rotate slightly, keeping the Mirror in his field of vision.

"funny you should mention him. blasters are pretty loud. and we're right out here where anyone can see. people are gonna come see what's happening. they're gonna wonder about the two weird skeletons and their weird powers."

"that sounds like a personal problem."

"papyrus might wonder why a version of his brother is trying to kill another. don't think that'll sit well with him."

"then i guess i'd better dust you before he gets here."

The Mirror sends another volley of bones, this one spiraling through the air toward Sans. Sans simply dodges again, the bones coming nowhere near him. The Mirror makes a frustrated sound.

"take your turn, dammit. fight back."

"nah."

The Mirror throws several long femurs toward Sans that arc toward Sans in pairs. It gives him a very narrow margin to dodge, but dodge he does. He makes it look easy.

"then stand still and let me kill you! you want it, right? don't pretend you don't. don't pretend you don't deserve it."

"man, am i really this insufferable?"

The Mirror summons two Gaster Blasters, one on either side of Sans. Sans looks momentarily startled and the Blasters fire directly at each other. Sans dodges the beams, only to find two more appearing on either side again. He ducks and dodges forward, the Blasters missing him narrowly.

"huh. you've been practicing."

"damn straight. that useless, freakish sack of bones isn't going to surprise me again."

"shouldn't talk about your brother like that."

The Mirror throws more bones. Sans dodges. "he's garbage. not a real papyrus. not worth anything."

"just like you, in other words."

"just like any sans. all of us, every version of us, is garbage. it just means i'm authentic!" He punctuates his words with two more Blasters, but Sans dodges both of them. The Mirror snarls in frustrated rage.

"fight back! fight back or just die! you know they'll all be better off without you. he'll be better off without you. all you ever do is hurt them. all you ever do is let them all down."

Sans rolls his shoulders and heaves a small, careless sigh.

"buddy, i might not have the best opinion of myself, but you're a thousand times worse. you really think i'll just lie down and die and leave everyone with you? heh. you really don't know yourself at all."

The Mirror's face screws up into a mask of sheer fury, but then he suddenly grins. There's not an ounce of mirth in it.

"but you're forgetting, sans. i know your secrets. even the ones you haven't spilled to everyone and their mother. the ones you never tell anyone."

He reaches out a hand, and before Sans can react, there's a loud ding from somewhere. Sans freezes in place. A blue glow appears at his chest. He looks down and then raises a hand slowly to cover it.

"you hate it, don't you? it feels terrible, every single time. like someone's holding you down. it makes you feel vulnerable."

The Mirror claws his fingers and makes a wrenching motion. Sans is jerked forward and downward. He has enough time to get his hands out to break his fall before he's slammed into the grass.

"makes you feel like anyone can do anything to you. do you think i could hold you in place like this and really take my time?"

Sans chuckles, face full of grass. Bones start to slowly sprout from the earth around him and inch closer, painfully slow.

"got two more secrets for you. one--"

He gets his hand against his chest again and grits his teeth. There's another ding, and Sans makes a pained sound. This part sucks. It's worse when someone else does it, but turning your own soul blue just feels so wrong.

The Mirror's eyesockets widen and he drops his hand.

"you can just d--?"

"and two..." Sans releases his own soul, sits up a bit and reaches outward. Another ding. The glow appears at his Mirror's chest this time, and the Mirror lifts off the ground.

Sans grins.

"blue isn't even nearly as bad as green."

He makes a tossing motion and the Mirror is launched upward like a ragdoll. He lets out a startled yell, but about thirty feet in the air he vanishes, teleporting and landing on the grass a few feet away. He wobbles slightly, unsteady.

Sans sighs, picks himself up, dusts grass off his front and turns to face his Mirror, ready for round two.



[ooc: sans and mirror!sans]

Comments

[dustiest]

You think they wouldn't want to watch these two smiley trashbags beat the ever-loving crap out of each other? Frisk's reaction, upon learning that they can creep out of the mirror and witness the world from the real side, was nothing short of delight.

It's easy to distinguish between the two of them, honestly. There's Sans, vanilla and endlessly exhausted. And then there's his mirror, who's got that additional hard edge to him that they can subtly appreciate.

Of course, they're not really rooting for anyone in particular. They just want whoever's likely to make things interesting to win. But the mirror has those marginally chaotic tendencies, which has them...sufficiently intrigued. Ha-ha.

Savage excitement flits briefly across their features as they glance between the two of them and then, because they can, start applauding.

"Encore! Encore!"

[punful]

Just like Sans said would happen, a crowd is starting to form. At a glance, it seems to mostly consist of...kids. Multiple Frisks. Well, that's just perfect.

The Mirror has noticed as well, flashing a grin in Mirror Frisk's direction. That's just about the only Frisk that's worth seeing, in any timeline. The bitey little thing who is exactly what they are, no facade, no delusions. Not good, not bad. Just nasty. Just Determined.

"well hey, we've got an audience. should we start telling jokes?"

Sans glances over, picks out which Frisk is which. This event is--man. This is all really escalating quickly, isn't it? And that's definitely the Mirror Frisk. The spitting image of the kid he knows, but with that awful look in their eyes. Calling for an encore.

"i dunno, your jokes have been falling pretty flat lately."

On the word flat Sans reaches out and seizes his Mirror's soul, slamming him down flat on his back. He lets go as soon as the Mirror hits the ground and the Mirror grunts at the impact, pulling himself back to his feet a moment later.

"you worthless sack of bones."

"heh, speak for yourself."

The Mirror throws another line of bones his way and Sans dodges.

SAVE 1.0

[dustiest]

Frisk keeps applauding wildly. They're turning each other blue! This is fantastic! It's like a million fanfictions rolled into one spectacular performance!

But heck, as long as they're here, why not make things a little more interesting?

First, though, they've got to cover all their bases. SAVE where their Real invariably wouldn't, because they're a little baby who sucks at long-term planning. And then, forward we go!

"Hey Sans!" calls Frisk cheerfully to the Real, "catch!"

And they send the Burnt Pan winging at him. Dodge this along with your mirror's little bones! It's a decent weapon, ultimately disposable compared to the Dagger, and thus easily sacrificed for the cause.

fuck

[punful]

There's a Blaster array firing at him, though not a particularly complex one. Just a handful of Blasters firing in alternating rows. You just skip back and forth between them as the blast from the first bunch fades. Simple.

Or it would be simple, if there wasn't suddenly a goddamn frying pan spiralling toward his head like a Frisbee made of death, and holy shit, why does the kid have to always have such good aim.

He ducks to avoid the pan and it sails over his head, passing through a beam and melting into nothing in the next instant. Only the distraction makes him lose his timing, and in the next second, another blast is coming straight for him.

Jeez.

No choice but to just teleport. He lands behind his Mirror and for just a moment there's a spark of bluish light in his left eyesocket. He squeezes it shut just for a second. Teleporting too much, using too much energy, even if all of it is going into dodging and not into attacking.

"hey, no input from the audience, thanks."

The Mirror turns to face him, laughing.

"nice throw, kid."

;^]

[dustiest]

Frisk is laughing, an ecstatic burst of sound. This is hilarious. They almost brained him right over the head, messed with all of his timing and everything! He's worth an awful lot of EXP on top of it, isn't he? Wouldn't have nearly gotten gutted by a Knife-happy child if he wasn't!

They're grinning hard enough for it to hurt, to count as a Sans of some kind, maybe. Except, ha-ha, they're not a festering pit of self-hatred. So that's a prime difference.

"Should've thought of that before you decided to engage in public brawling!" Frisk declares airily as they dart along the charred battlefield to retrieve their weapon. "Did you know you've got people placing bets? Personally, I'm rooting for the more fun of the two."

SAVE 1.0

[gainedlove]

[* ...]
[* What did we just watch.]

[* (What was that big skull?!)]
[* (I didn't know he could do THAT!)]

[* Frisk, we need to go, before they decide to--FRISK!]

[Of course they aren't going to listen to such sound advice, though. Frisk goes charging right into the middle of it, reaching out on instinct and only surprised for a moment that a SAVE responds in this place. Screeching to a halt between the two Sanses, they face toward the one that they...think is the doppleganger.]

Stoppit!

[They're shorter than the Frisk he's used to seeing, smaller and younger but still just as determined, just as light of a SOUL. LV 1, 0 EXP, but they hold the Dagger tightly in their hand.]

Why are you FIGHTing?!

[punful]

They're both back on their feet, the Mirror firing off three more Blasters and Sans dodging like it's nothing. The Mirror is clearly pushing himself too hard at this rate, but Sans himself doesn't seem all that winded. Though it's hard to tell. He's always tired.

"fight back already!"

The Mirror summons an array of Gaster Blasters above his head and Sans braces himself, ready to dodge or teleport. Then there's a shout.

And then there's a kid in the way. Then there's a Frisk in the way.

Sans has time to register that, A) it's a different Frisk, not a Mirror but just a different version, younger, smaller, and B) they're right in the line of fire.

His Mirror pauses, and has time enough to look startled, but he's not nearly as good at this as Sans is. And no Sans is as good at this as Papyrus. No monster in the Underground but Papyrus can stop midway through an attack.

The Blasters fire and Sans teleports. Lands right next to the kid, gets a hand on their shoulder and teleports again.

Shortcuts aren't the most pleasant experience when they're that sudden, but, well, the alternative is watching a child die, because a LV 1 Frisk can't possibly survive even a single Gaster Blaster and there's three of them because damn, his Mirror is an asshole. Really putting himself through the wringer trying to dust his Real, and obviously not caring who sees or gets caught in the crossfire.

Sans reappears, Frisk in tow, several feet to the side. It all happens in less than a second, so they get front row seats as the Blasters destroy the spot where they were both just standing.

The Mirror drops his hand, the Blasters vanish and he casts around rather frantically for his Real and the new Frisk. Sans, meanwhile, lets go of Frisk's shoulder. The Mirror spots them.

"shit."

"language, buddy." Sans looks down at the new Frisk. "jeez, kid. you okay? nearly gave me a heart attack."

The Mirror rounds on them both.

"that's not even your frisk. why bother protecting them? why bother protecting any of these brats, considering what they've done?"

Sans completely ignores his Mirror.

"so you, uh...did you shrink, kid? or are you new?"

[gainedlove]

Shortcuts were always a little dizzying, even when Frisk expects them. And they had never had one sprung on them in the middle of a FIGHT before--they stumble on landing, flinching back from the bright wash of light (* You can smell the grass burning.) before they look up at Sans.

"I...yes?"

Why wouldn't they be okay?

The other Sans snaps and Frisk flinches, freezes, staring at the skeleton with wide eyes, remembering judgement upon judgement upon judgement...he remembers? They'd seen the lab, they knew he suspected, but he knows...?

* Snap out of it!

They suck in a sharp breath, and look up at the kinder one.

"I, um--I just got here?" Then they remember why they'd charged in in the first place, and pushes him away from the battlefield. "Go, just run, I'll--I'll make him calm down!"

[punful]

Not his Frisk. Or rather, not Wonderland Frisk, and not the one he knows back home. But a Frisk, certainly, and there's a look to them, something in their eyes or expression that reminds him more of...

Huh. Maybe.

"good."

Seems he actually can get there in time, sometimes.

The kid pushes him, and sometimes he forgets how strong this kid actually is, because he stumbles backward a step. They're telling him to run. The Mirror starts laughing.

"awww, how cute. the anomaly wants to save you. you always have to have kids save your coccyx, don't you?"

Sans steps forward again, between his Mirror and the new Frisk.

"sorry, kid. normally i'm all for letting other people fight my battles. but this guy's kind of my responsibility."

Funny, Sans talking about responsibility and actually accepting it.

"pfft, look at you. thinking you've changed. you know this--this happy little family bullshit won't last. you know it's just a matter of time. it's always a matter of time."

The Mirror summons another Gaster Blaster, aimed for both of them.

"you'd better get that kid out of the way fast, cause i'm not above blasting right th--"

Sans raises a hand and turns the Mirror's soul blue. His left eyesocket sparks for just a second and he tosses the Mirror up and in a wide arc, sending him sailing over Sans's shoulder. The Mirror lets out a startled yelp as he goes.

The Blaster dissipates into nothing. Sans sighs.

"man. this is annoying." He turns to Frisk again, as if he didn't just throw a version of himself about fifty feet in the air. "you might wanna get out of here, kid. he's a real weirdo. we can talk later, okay? if you're here along with my frisk, something pretty crazy must be going on."

Usually events are just one thing, but now alternates are showing up and there's a second mansion and the Mirrors are crossing over. Wonderland's really pulling out all stops.

Sans's Mirror reappears nearby, teleporting from wherever he ended up, two more Gaster Blasters at the ready. Sans squeezes Frisk's shoulder for just a moment.

"chara's in there too, right? if they can hear me, they'll probably agree--you gotta get out of here. get somewhere safe."

[gainedlove]

"Sans--!"

He's not listening! If he knows about them he must know they can't really die, he doesn't need to protect them, especially not with a proper SAVE here! But there isn't even any chance to ACT before the double goes flying, and really, who can blame the kids for staring in awe at the flailing bag of bones way up in the air?

They are still listening, though. Enough to hear Sans Name the Fallen Human.

"Wh--"

He...he knows? They told him?

Chara is quicker on the draw than Frisk. Their eyes flicker, changing with the shift in their SOUL, and with a sudden flinch they take two steps back from Sans. "...if you do not find them, they will come back. Do not disappoint them." Chara isn't interested in the sort of FIGHT this promises to be; even Flowey's world wasn't a hall of one-hit-kills. But they know how their partner thinks, how far Frisk will go for the ones they love. They didn't help SAVE you for nothing, Sans.

popcorn.gif, OTA I guess?

[fulllifeconsequences]

...Okay. Sure. This might as well be happening. Why not?

They know the sound of Blasters firing by heart. It draws Chara like a moth to a flame, because they can't comprehend what would drive Sans to fight at all, let alone use those. They didn't seem like the kind of thing he bared lightly, not around monsters who might start asking questions.

It's... kind of surprising when they arrive and see he's using them on himself, to say the least.

They're kind of glad, almost, that they'd had a conversation about this possibility. Were already well-used to the concept of mirror selves. If one of the Sans-es was fighting back, they're not sure they'd be able to distinguish which one is (ha ha, yeah right) theirs.

Chara sits down where they are, well out of the way. Safely on the sidelines. Like a hooded figure watching from afar, doing nothing to help or hinder.

It's interesting, after all. Wasn't he the one who judged them when they chose to fight back? Wasn't he the one who understood "protect and watch over" as "well I'm not directly shooting them, so it's fine?"

Be nice to see if his own actions live up to those expectations. See how he spares his way out of this. Self-defense means there's still dust on your hands, you're still not a good person, after all, so of course he'll surely choose mercy.

And if, in the process, Chara can commit a few of his patterns to memory, well... it couldn't hurt, could it?

[dodged_and_burned]

"I bet you five dog treats that Sans is actually a murderer."

It's not a fair bet because Chara knows Sans better than mirror-Max does, but... what the hell, dog treats are cheap.

"I bet you five dog treats that Sans is actually a murderer in the next hour!"

Mirror-Max's amused smirk widens slightly as she takes a position next to Chara and stuffs her hands into the pockets of her light jacket. The mid-morning sunlight glints off her shades and paints streaks of lighter brown in her hair.

"Wowser," she comments gaily at one particularly massive Gaster Blaster combo, the hairs on her arm standing up with the charged electricity in the air.

[fulllifeconsequences]

Huh. Max is dressed a little differently today. Also acting distinctly less introverted and nervous.

...Is this... the mirror Max, perhaps? It occurs to Chara, in a moment of vague unease, that they really have no idea whatsoever how to tell people apart from their fakes merely by looking.

Well, either way, she doesn't seem to be interested in doing anything but spectating, so Chara shrugs, goes along with it.

"That'd be a foolish bet for me to take. I know for a fact Sans is a murderer." Other timelines count. They remember. They do nothing but remember. "You'll have to clarify which Sans you intend to bet on, anyway, won't you? It's very readily apparent that one of these lazybones is trying his very hardest to become a murderer. I'd be stupid to accept a bet if he's the one you're betting on."

Are we go for time-travel??

[dodged_and_burned]

Her eyes widen with appreciation. "Yeah but that Sans- that one, the one that just did that weird twirling dodge thing- he's trying his darnedest to not get murdered. "As though interrupting herself, she suddenly shouts in the direction of the fighting skeletons, after a very narrow dodge by one of them. "That's right, get bowned Sans!"

She frowns at Chara and mumbles. "That pun sounded a lot better in my head. Fuck. But anyway," she adds, "Why are we standing over here instead of charging in over there?" With a practiced and casual air, she slips her hand beneath her jacket and withdraws a pistol. "I mean, at least one of us is an attempted killer... uhh, bonerer?" She frowns again, this time at her feet as she tries to come up with an appropriate word. "Skillerton?"

3/3 IT IS BROUGHT YO

[dodged_and_burned]

"Scoot, please." Max asks politely, shooing Chara aside. In about thirty seconds that death ray will be heading toward her again, and she'd like to move closer to Chara rather than away from them to avoid it. How else will they be able to keep talking? "I need to be standing right there," she says, as though Chara wouldn't know.

But her pleasant smile and the mischief in her eye says she knows precisely what Chara just saw. And her words drip with the tone of I told you so.

attempted dunkage

[punful]

At some point, Sans takes stock of the audience again and notices that Chara is here now. His Chara, or, well, at least as close as you can get, the regular Wonderland Chara. This is all, uh. Really inconvenient.

"so can we stop this yet? cause i'm starting to get both firsthand and secondhand embarrassment."

"what? aww, am i wearing you out already?" The Mirror throws a few bones and Sans dodges.

"see, that's the secondhand embarrassment i'm talking about. you're the one who's trying way too hard."

"well, maybe i just need to raise the stakes."

The Mirror teleports, landing closer to Chara. He fixes cruel eyelights on them, grin wide and wicked.

"you like this thing, right? for some reason. i can't believe you haven't killed it yet. how long before it does something to papyrus, huh?"

"man, you're so annoying. i can't believe you're underestimating them."

"oh, i'm not. why do you think i'm keeping my distance? but you care about it so much, so i wonder what you would do if i..."

He raises a hand and, well, Sans is getting pretty royally sick of this. Chara could undoubtedly destroy this moron, but that's part of the problem. The last thing anyone needs is Chara gaining more LV because some dumbass decided to try them.

There's a ding and Sans turns his Mirror's soul blue. The Mirror gets tossed up and over Sans's shoulder, like he's throwing away some annoying garbage. Sans then teleports, putting himself between Chara and wherever his Mirror lands.

"alright, no need to involve the audience. we're not that guy with the watermelons. this is between sans-es. skel a skel."

He glances back at Chara.

"just so you know, i would totally not blame you if you started selling tickets to this stupidity."

m!sans goes swishing through the net, the crowd goes wild

[fulllifeconsequences]

Chara stays sitting in the grass, eyebrows raised. Really? He's really gonna pull that bullhonkey? He's gonna try and drag them into some cornball 2v1 Power of Friendship and Teamwork kind of thing just to -

Ah. Nope. There he goes. It's no fun being turned blue, but it's kind of satisfying to watch somebody else get flung around like a ragdoll.

Thank god. Chara would probably have elected for a quick and sizzling death over having to be part of some kind of heart of the cards bonding exercise.

"So is Bizarro Sans, like, really tryhard instead of lazy? Is that what he's going for?" Pretty obvious which Sans is which, now that they can hear the pair of them talking. Kind of funny, actually, because they'd have actually pegged the whole "threaten to destroy them and refer to them as an inhuman thing" bit as much more in-character for him before Wonderland went and made everything all... whatever-this-is.

"I'm not helping you with him, you know. I'd rather see what kind of example you intend to set here. Also, I have absolutely no idea why he's trying to kill you, so..." They trail off, shrug halfheartedly.

[punful]

It'd be kind of hilarious, if nothing else. Sans and Chara, teaming up for any reason at all. Hilarious, and also incredibly stressful, as Sans would need to be both keeping Chara alive and keeping them from gaining any more EXP.

"something like that. or he just really, really wants to be real. like that guy in the disney movie. can't believe he's putting in this much effort."

It's embarrassing, really. Sans-es are supposed to be experts at taking what's giving to them.

"wrong." The Mirror appears nearby. "all i want is you dead. all i want is papyrus."

Sans ignores him.

"pfft. wouldn't expect you to. but that's it, huh? you wanna see what i'll do? heh." He actually winks at Chara. "wait around a bit and you might even see my special attack."

"you can't dodge forever, sans. and you can't protect that thing forever. even if you chara-bout them. after i dust you, they're next."

Sans shrugs. "sure. cause both those things are that easy."

"well, that's the difference between us." The Mirror summons another array of Blasters. "you do nothing. but me, i'm willing to do anything to protect papyrus."

ota if people wanna jump in!

[kairotic]

This is, objectively, the best day of her life.

As soon as she figured out she could cross over from the mirror side, she's been everywhere. Taking people's stuff, poking around, generally causing mayhem. But the sound of the blasters outside was too tempting. Who was Sans messing with now?

Of course, by the time she gets there, the mirror is getting pissed, and his Real looks like he's just toying with him, and she's downright gleeful, standing off to the side so she doesn't get nailed by a blaster.

"Normally I'd be mad about this, but g-gosh, I really hope his real knocks him the fuck over." She mutters to no one in particular, before yelling towards the field. "C'mon, ruin h-him! I'll tag in if y-you need it! Knock him d-down!"

Okay, so she's petty, since the last time she and mirror Sans saw each other. So petty. But this is hilarious.

[punful]

Sans catches yellow out of the corner of his eyesocket and for a second he's...nervous. For one, he's not sure how Alphys is going to react to all these Gaster Blasters, and for two, he's not sure if she's the type to throw herself in harm's way in an attempt to stop this...this abject stupidity, is what this is.

But then he manages to take a second to actually look over at her and--

His audience is almost entirely Mirrors. That's, well. Unsettling. That's an awful lot of people who he doesn't trust, who probably really shouldn't be seeing this and probably taking mental notes of what the two dumpy skeletons are capable of. Not that Sans gives two shits what happens to his idiot Mirror, but if Mirrors are crossing over willy nilly and paying attention to him, then...

It's probably only a matter of time before a Mirror of his brother shows up, or any of the other actually dangerous Mirrors. This is all quickly becoming a real shitshow.

At least she's rooting for him?

"god, that bitch."

Sans brings his attention back to the fight. Apparently his Mirror has noticed the other Alphys as well.

"jeez, dude, language. some of our good friends are dogs, you know."

"she just wants to see me fail. again!" The Mirror fires off one Blaster, then another, then another. Sans dodges each one. "she's not even the right one, but it's always her. standing on the damn sidelines. but you have no idea, do you? you have no idea what she allowed to happen to us, in that timeline you don't want to think about."

Sans's totally neutral expression flickers for a moment. The Mirror sees it and grins.

"yeah. that timeline. you've been avoiding thinking about it, haven't you? where did you think she was in that timeline? hey, sans. what do you think she allowed to happen to papyrus, and to the correct version of you?"

The Mirror summons another Blaster, but before he can fire Sans turns the Mirror's soul blue and tosses him away.

"i mean, she's shown us some pretty bad anime, but nothing that bad. i guess you just can't appreciate the magic of japanese animation, huh?"

[kairotic]

"Wow, rude." She fires off, letting the two of them get back to arguing but listening intently as his Mirror tries to get under his skin. What is he talking about? Some ridiculous timeline, but now she's abjectly curious. Maybe that's where she should be poking around this week.

"I wouldn't b-be so interested in watching you drop if you didn't threaten me the l-last time we spoke, you know! Maybe your little tough-guy stunt isn't h-holding up so well." God, she almost wants him to break away from fighting to just go a round with her. That would be hilarious. He's worked up, he's sloppy, and it would be easy to go for the kill. She bets it would horrify his Real, too. Two birds with one stone.

"C'mon, Real, really chuck him! I k-know you're capable. If you d-don't want to kill him, toss him in the ocean or something!"

Let's just pretend that Mettaton somehow escaped in time to see this

[mettatonvevo]

He's been running for a good 20 minutes now, dodging and weaving through hallways in an attempt to put as much distance between him and his mirror as possible. He needs to warn people about this looney who is running around with his face, but with the hectic nature of this latest event, Mettaton hasn't had time to text anyone about the dangers his mirror presents.

He ends up in the courtyard, trying to find a quiet spot outside to send out a mass text to anyone he knows, or maybe post something to the Network warning EVERYONE, but then there's a huge current of magic thrumming through the air and his defense mechanisms kick in and he finds himself jumping to the side to avoid what is possibly the equivalent of a nuclear war head in the Underground.

When he gets his wits about him again he can't stop the wide eyed shock on his face as he sees Sans (Sans!?) unleash a giant blast towards... another Sans? He moves away enough to not be in immediate danger, their constant moving of the battlefield something to worry about five minutes from now.

do you wanna say this is before or after sans meets his mirror

[punful]

The Mirror isn't the type to care about collateral damage, but Sans certainly is. For one thing, this poor courtyard is getting torn to shreds with bones and Blaster fire. For another, the Mirror has only the most bare-bones (haha) control over his attacks. Blasts keep going wide, rays of bones keep shooting well past their target. Sans is very good at keeping track of his environment and the people in it because he has always had to be good at it.

So when he spots Mettaton right in the path of a blast, his first instinct is to teleport straight to him and get him the hell out of the way. He's about to, but then Mettaton dodges all on his own. He's quietly impressed with Mettaton's reflexes. Must be programming from that NEO form of his kicking in or something. A lot of monsters don't dodge at all.

Sans teleports, landing closer to Mettaton but already moving in an arc away from him. The last thing he needs is for his Mirror to send an attack his way and hit Mettaton instead.

Mettaton or...his Mirror. Which, well, if that's the case then Sans could care less.

"hey, uh, i know this is the kind of over-the-top performance you like, but you...might wanna skip this one. or move back a bit."

The Mirror teleports closer as well, trying to herd Sans backward.

"oh, no, leave the robot there. let him watch. do you think he'll cry when i turn his MTT-brand sanswear (tm) into ash?"

The Mirror shoots a nasty grin at Mettaton before turning back to Sans and throwing several spinning bones toward him. Sans dodges.

"do you just make a habit of underestimating everyone, or...?"

"please. what's there to overestimate? i just can't believe you fell for it. you're garbage, but you're not stupid. you really didn't see that dumb gift for what it was?"

I'd say due to timing constraints for both Metta and Sans, this is before

[mettatonvevo]

It's very easy to distinguish which Sans is which now that they are closer, even if the Mirror hadn't opened his mouth. The stitching on their hoodies is massively different, one by a machine and one that is hand-stitched. He'll have to remember that for the rest of this event, just in case he runs into Sans's mirror one-on-one. Is the whole "giant magic gun" thing only something Sans's Mirror has or are Mettaton and the Real Sans going to have to have another conversation?

Regardless, this whelp thinks he's cute, and Mettaton isn't going to take it quietly.

"I'm surprised you have the gumption to get out of bed, looking as disgusting as you do. Is there something about the mirror side that makes everyone from there trashy? I hope it's not contagious."

He gets to watch Mirror Sans take another swipe at Real Sans and then... is he badmouthing HIS gift?

"Oh, oh, let me guess, this is the part where you try to spin it so that my gift is meaningless, right? Let's here what your pitiful mind has to say."

excellento

[punful]

If Sans knew that's how Mettaton was differentiating them, he would laugh. Because of course that's what Mettaton notices.

The Mirror, however, actually does laugh, though his attention is focused on Sans.

"heh, see, there's the mettaton we're supposed to know. insulting people on a whim. tearing them down. self-obsessed."

The Mirror summons another Blaster and fires, but Sans just dodges again.

"you're the one who's being pretty self-obsessed right now, yanno."

"it's a two froggits, one stone kind of thing. he's a narcissistic, walking garbage can, but he's not stupid either. he's savvy. and he wants people on his side. what's a 'star' without adoring fans? all the better if those adoring fans have such little self-esteem that a nice, fancy gift is enough to make them dance in the palm of his hand. now you feel like you owe him, and that's exactly what he wants."

Sans rolls his eyelights, gives an exasperated sigh and dodges again as the Mirror fires another round of Gaster Blasters. This guy really is pulling out all stops, isn't he?

"plus, it has the added benefit of getting rid of an eyesore. everything about you is an eyesore, after all."

"yeah, eyesocket-sore is a bit of a mouthful."

More bones, tearing up the ground and rushing at Sans from opposite directions. He dodges and the Mirror makes a frustrated noise. He shoots a look at Mettaton.

"you said it yourself, boxbot. i'm disgusting, i'm pitiful. you'd have never given a sans the time of day underground. but now he owes you. now he's beholden to you, cause he's terrible at being objective when people are nice to him."

The Mirror gives Mettaton a vicious grin.

"maybe that does something to ease some of the...jealousy. what do you think, robot?"

Sans laughs, even as he's dodging another volley of bones.

"now that's a laugh. nice one, bud, didn't think you had it in you. no one in the world is jealous of a sans."