entrancelogs | Don't cross the river if you can't swim the tide

Entry tags:

Don't cross the river if you can't swim the tide

Who: Mettaton, some closed starters, and YOU!
Where: All around the mansion
When: Throughout the event
Rating: PG-13 unless something happens, upon which this will be changed
Summary: Mettaton is in the no-air-no-problem club, buuut those RESETs are giving him a bit of a run for his money. All well! There’s places to go and things to do, and he’s not gonna let a little water and time shenanigans stop him. …yeah…
The Story:

A.

[It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s…. what the hell is that. A rectangular submarine??? If you’re attempting to swim through the halls, have your door open to stare at the water, or if there is a window in your room to the hallway, you’ll catch sight of this robot in a different form propelling himself through the water. Maybe he’s carrying food in a water-tight container. Maybe he’s transporting someone’s pets or other things that need to be moved. Maybe he’s coming to “save” you! (Save being the operative word, depending on if you actually want to see him… and if he’ll be helpful or not.)

Either way, he’s here now. Or passing by. Wanna say hi?]

B.

Swimming through the mansion can be a bit tiring. Especially with the magic reinforcement that is partially behind his water-proofing, is draining his charge pretty quickly. So here he is, chilling out in some random empty room. Don’t worry, he doesn’t breathe; no air is being lost. Maybe he stumbled into your room or maybe you’re stumbling into whatever room he is relaxing in. Either way, here is a dripping wet robot at your disposal. ;)

C.

[Listen. A lot can happen in 5 minutes, right? I bet even MORE can happen if you repeat the same 5 minutes over and over and over and over and over….

Our lovely robot is stuck in a rather persistent RESET that is determined to make Mettaton repeat the last 5 minutes of his life. Why not keep him company and/or get trapped in it yourself! The world is your resetting oyster now that the water has leaked out of the mansion.]

D.
Wild card! Got an idea for your character and Mettaton? Throw it up here and we can go, ha, wild!

((ooc: while one of these prompts is specific for the resets, any prompt can have them involved if you want! Either indicate it in your subject or put it in your description and we can play around with it!))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[((OOC: sounds perfect to me! ♥))

Mettaton has been all over the place during this event, but he's been making trips back to his room now and then to check on things, make sure his equipment and other objects are safe and secure. With air running out in various rooms and the resets making people repeat their actions over and over again, he knows that anyone could burst into his room looking for relief at any moment. So it's a matter of practicality that brought him back here.

Then Bucky Barnes literally bursts into his room and suddenly Mettaton is internally flooded with a slew of emotions, the most prominent being guilt. He helps him check other ways to leave, of course, mostly silently and not saying more than needs to be said. After all, once he finds a safe way out, he'll go and Mettaton can go back to feeling shitty about what happened between them in peace. But they don't find a safe way for him to leave. So now they sit. Here. Together.

If it weren't for the fact that the air is literally getting thinner in the room, he'd think that the awkwardness was making it harder to breathe. ...even though he doesn't breathe. Whatever. The room should have two more hours of oxygen, so there isn't much to worry about at this point.

He sits on the edge of his bed, staring at his own hands. He gives the human an occasional glance, but immediately looks away, especially when his eyes accidentally meet Bucky's. There's a tinge of redness to his cheeks when that happens and he hates himself just a little for it.

The silence stretches and he knows he shouldn't say anything, should just keep his mouth shut and let things run their course, but when he gives a quick glance to the mirror he hastily shoved to the side of his bed so that Bucky wouldn't see it uncovered and finds no writing, he decides, well, he might as well say something.]

So. This event seems to be. Very wet.

[...wow, ok, speaking clearly was a horrible, horrible idea.]

[When their eyes meet, Bucky has a hard time shifting his gaze away. There's a light tint to Mettaton's cheeks and it makes him want to smile, to tease - but, no. They can't do that anymore. Mettaton made it perfectly clear he didn't want Bucky in his life. People don't say those kinds of things to people they wanna see the next day. He jerks his chin down, pulling his knees up to his chest and looping an arm around them. The oxygen levels are getting low, but he's got some time before he'll need to brace the water outside.

Bucky snorts.]

Yeah, sure is.

[He wraps his arm a little tighter, and he doesn't want to do this. Talk, or try to be nice. He doesn't want to pretend like everything's okay but he doesn't want to deal with the fact that it's not.

Besides, there's still things he wants to say but he doesn't figure Mettaton is in the mood to hear it. So he waits, again, tips his head down and doesn't say anything, but then -]

Really appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone that it's Steve. Don't care what you say about me, but don't bring him up. [His voice is firm, unfairly accusatory - Bucky knows Mettaton would never do anything to purposefully hurt Steve, he didn't do anything to him. Still, he needs him to know.] Don't think anyone would give him a hard time, but you can't always know that.

I don't.. I don't want anyone treating him like shit because he's with me, okay?

[Men weren't allowed to be with men the last time Bucky was his own person.]

[The snort brings a small smile to Mettaton's face before he carefully wipes it away again. Well. At least he found his awkward statement funny. Bucky looks away, tips his head down, and Mettaton is beginning to become quietly grateful that nothing else is being said when-]

What?

[His head snaps to Bucky, confusion etched on his face which he once again takes command of very quickly, slipping back to a neutral face. He lets his gaze wander off of Bucky in what he hopes is a natural manner.]

Why would they treat him badly for being with you? Do people dislike you both? If they do they should mind their own business. Their opinions have no place in your love life.

[Unless there's a danger to either of them, but Mettaton figures that goes without saying. He can't think of who would hate Steve or Bucky though. And while he may be a bit bitter and sad now and then when he thinks of them together, he's certainly not going to stop them or say anything. It isn't his place.

He has no idea that Bucky's worry stems from them being the same gender.]

Nobody dislikes Steve.

[Well, not that he knows of. It's hard to dislike someone as good as him. Bucky, on the other hand, has a list a mile long of people that don't like him - hate him, even, but he doesn't think any of those people are here.]

We're men, Mettaton. [He shrugs a shoulder.] I know it's not as common now, but it used to be something that'd get you in a lot of trouble.

Don't want people to know unless Steve tells them himself.

[That way if anything negative comes back, it'd be something he's prepared for. He sighs though, shifting a little towards the robot.]

I didn't think you'd tell anyone on purpose or that anyone you would tell would be an ass about it. I just don't want anyone to hurt him because of me. He's had enough of that already.

[Bucky's eyes flick up, drop back down, he pulls his knees up to his chest and presses his face to them, arms curled around. He feels sick, again, uncomfortable, because as soon as he'd opened his mouth around Mettaton, all he'd wanted to do was share all his secrets. ( To talk and talk and talk, and Bucky never wants to talk to anybody. But they're not friends anymore, Mettaton made that perfectly clear. He doesn't want to keep opening up, keep going back only to find out he's not good enough all over again. He doesn't want to hurt Mettaton again. ) He doesn't realize that he'd been mumbling, saying those last few lines under his breath.

He squeezes his arms tighter.]

[Men? Why would it matter if they're-

Oh. That's right. Humans can be weird about the whole "same gender" thing.]

I forgot that humans can have a stigma against that sort of thing. We don't have those same attitudes in the Underground.

[Alphys is a bisexual lizard woman dating a lesbian fish woman back home, so same gender dating was the last thing on his mind as being a problem.]

I get that. You just want to protect someone you love. I can understand the need to make sure I don't run my mouth. I won't tell anyone, I promise.

[Which in all honesty is a good thing, because neither of them know it yet, but come Valentine's day, Mettaton is going to be outing a lot of people's relationships for all of Wonderland to see on the Network and this promise is the one thing that will hold him back from spilling the beans about him and Steve.

Things go quiet between them and Mettaton thinks that's it to their discussion. There's nothing more to be said between them, right? Bucky got him to keep his relationship secret and that's what he'll do. It's the least he can do after the way he treated him during and after Hell.

He's not initially paying attention when Bucky starts talking aloud to himself, but he manages to catch the gist of the beginning and tunes in towards the end and closes his eyes. It hurts to hear him speak like that. As easy as it was for Bucky to speak to Mettaton, it was easy for the robot to talk to the man too. He was the only one in all of Wonderland he had ever, for a moment, considered telling about his true past and it had been frightening but almost... nice.

And now they were here. Sitting in awkward silence with their good regard for each other long gone.]

...You've always been good enough Bucky. I'm sorry I made you think you weren't.

[That hadn't been the reason why he had pushed him away back then. Not at all. He just didn't want to use him. He hadn't wanted to take advantage of him but then after all was said and done, he'd still used Bucky's trust to hurt him more.]

[Bucky believes him when he promises not to say anything. He doesn't care, one way or the other, if people know he likes men or women or both or neither. They can say what they want about him, it doesn't bother him, but.. Steve is different. He deserves the chance to tell people on his own terms. There are those in Wonderland that should find out directly from the source, not second-hand.

He makes a sound against the hard press of his knee - he accepted the first promise for truth, he doesn't believe this.

There are few things Bucky can be convinced of, if given time and genuine explanations, but raising his self-worth, after it's been crushed, when it was already so low.. yeah, that's not so easy. Even Steve struggles to help Bucky with that, and internally he understands that it'll only ever get better if he works on it. So he takes a deep breath and raises his head.]

You aren't allowed to say that to me. You chose.

[He swallows, opts for a last ditch effort to protect himself.]

And you didn't pick me. [Bucky raises a hand, opens his mouth, drops and closes.] I never wanted to hurt you. I would've loved you back the same way if I could have. There's just not room enough in my heart to love two people that much that way.

[He tries to calm his breathing. The oxygen in the room is slowly draining and he doesn't want to make it worse.]

But we still coulda been friends. Still could have been together.

[It takes a lot of Mettaton's self-control to not lash out angrily at Bucky's words. Him? Not allowed? No one tells Mettaton what he is and isn't allowed to do! But he swallows the impulse. He knows that Bucky doesn't mean it as dictating what he can and can't really feel, or at least he hopes he doesn't mean it that way.]

Chose? I didn't think there was a choice involved. I accepted that you didn't feel the same way for me as I felt for you, and I accepted when you told me to leave. It wasn't the most graceful thing I have done, but I did it.

[He knows it's supposed to be a comfort when people say these things. He knows this, at least, Bucky doesn't mean to say to hurt. But all those words do, all those "I would've loved you's", is make his heart ache. His heart aches and wonders about a world where Mettaton came first. It makes him wish that he hadn't held himself back during those sweet trysts they used to have in the hallways before things became complicated. Maybe things would have been different.]

You say that like things would have immediately been perfect. Like I wouldn't be struggling to get over you. You want friendship and I want... I want to give that back but I...

[He shakes his head, giving another quick look to the mirror hidden beside him. There's no writing, but there's no way he isn't watching. He's always watching.]

I shouldn't. I can't. As much as I loved our friendship, you should seek out someone else.

[He hates this. He hates how he feels, how much he wants to be weak and collapse at Bucky's feet and tell him, no, I change my mind, I want to make this work, I want our friendship back just please give me time, I can love you like you love me, please don't go. But he can hold it together, he thinks. There's no way Bucky would give him another chance, so it's just a matter of waiting it out.

He does want to say one more thing, however.]

But, even though you should seek out someone else, I just wanted to say I regret that our last kiss was during that event. I know that chapter of things between us is done, but that is not the way I would have chosen that to end.

[There. That's it. He's said what's been resting on his mind for awhile now. No matter how much this hurts, he can let this go. ~~He's always been good at lying to himself.~~]

You chose nothing, Mettaton. [Bucky's eyes are narrowed, focused in on the robot's face.] I couldn't give you what you wanted and you chose to have nothing with me.

It wouldn't have been easy, us being friends. I don't know what it's like to love someone who doesn't love me back, to be in a position like yours, but I know that I wouldn't give up on friendship so easily.

[Bucky was loyal, to his core. He still, now, would come back to Mettaton if he tried, if he put in the effort. If he proved he wanted him, too.]

If you loved our friendship, you wouldn't do this. You wouldn't keep doing this.

[He's supposed to walk away, to not want to make this work with Mettaton, but Bucky can't shake him. He can't. He's tried. But it's not who he is.]

We deserved better than that. The both of us. I didn't want that for us either.

[Bucky shifts forward, coming up on his knees.]

Why are we doing this? I don't wanna find anyone else. I want to fix us.

[Bucky's words hit and they hit hard. Is that really what it seemed like? That because he didn't get what he wanted, he dropped him? No. There was so much more to this, so much more that he just didn't understand and didn't seem to want to understand.

Mettaton hurt him. They shouldn't be friends anymore. And yet here he was, trying to give him another chance.]

If I did choose, I chose what I thought was best for the both of us. I don't want to hurt you again, Bucky. If we're distant, I won't be able to.

[Because, inevitably, this will happen again. Mettaton can't be selfish and cling to this friendship because eventually he'll abandon him again because that's what he does. That's how he loves.

His resolve is cracking. Bucky is right. If he loved this friendship as much as he says he does, shouldn't he fight for it? Shouldn't he push for it? He wants to look at the mirror again. He knows that by now if his mirror is watching he'll have said something but... he doesn't want to see it. He knows what he'll say. He knows what he'll remind him with and Mettaton isn't strong enough to carry on with what he should do.]

...we did deserve better, didn't we?

[Mettaton finally looks to Bucky fully rather than focusing around him and sees him on his knees and that's it. He can't do this. He can't fight this anymore. He gets up from his place by the bed and walks over to Bucky, dropping to his own knees and throwing his arms around him. He hugs him tight, half of him hoping that he overstepped his bounds so Bucky will push him away and do the work for him.]

I'm sorry, Bucky. I want to fix us too.

How can us not being together be what's best?

[Not when they're so good as friends. Bucky shakes his head, because he did his fair share of hurting during all of this. He's not innocent, never was and never will be, but he knows that if they both try, they can make this right. If they both want it, they can be friends again. It won't be easy, but they can do it.]

We still do.

[His voice is soft, low and pleading. They've made a lot of mistakes, dug themselves down into a hole that for a while even Bucky thought they'd never climb out of, but they're still here. He still wants Mettaton in his life. Around him, near him. To talk to and spend time with. Bucky makes a sound when Mettaton throws his arms around him, his own sliding up to curl around his waist.]

We'll figure this out, promise. [He holds him a little closer and then, because he feels guilty with hugging the robot when he knows that Mettaton will need time to move on, gently moves back. Bucky leans against the wall, urging Mettaton to sit on the ground across from him, their legs brushing up against one another's.] We should start out with me being a better friend.

[Bucky sighs, cause he's not sure this is going to go well either, but friends stick with each other through thick and thin. They give you the hard stuff. His eyes flick to the mirror.]

Why do you keep looking at that?

[It feels so, so good to be in Bucky's arms again, on multiple levels. It'd be silly to deny that part of him still wishes for the intimacy of before and his magic and electricity flutter as Bucky wraps his arms around him, but he missed this on a platonic level too. He's missed affection and physical touch and to receive this from someone he loves is a much-welcomed balm.

There's the smallest twinge of hurt when Bucky gently moves back, but Mettaton accepts it. To be friends again is to establish some boundaries and it will take some getting used to. He sits across from the human just as he indicates, trying to relax more into the casual contact.]

I suppose there's nothing wrong with trying to figure it out, at least.

[It does... feel wrong on some level. He shouldn't be giving into this but he has now. There's no turning back. Even though his mirror will be angry with him, it's too late to change his mind. He can't hurt Bucky like that again, not almost immediately after saying he wants to fix things.

Mettaton watches Bucky's eyes glance to where he had thought he had hidden the mirror out of his sight and he feels a spike of anxiety. He shouldn't have been so obvious... he'll reveal them both if he keeps this up! Despite his anxious thoughts, his face betrays nothing. Instead he quirks a curious eyebrow at the question.]

Aren't you worried about seeing any mirror writing? They're supposed to be always watching.

[The best lies are those mixed with truth.]

That's why you cover them up.

[Bucky's brows furrow, narrowed in on Mettaton rather than the mirror. He wonders if Mettaton's being honest with him. He likes to think he would be, but the Mirrors are known to be different than their real life counterparts. Maybe Mettaton's is using him, is cruel or abusive. Bucky immediately hates the idea of that and can't shake it.]

They are watching but you don't let them see you. [He might as well explain himself.] Most of them are manipulative. Mine is selfish and would use someone for his own gain. He's unkind and harsh, but he's smooth and charming.

Might be that yours is the same way, too.

[He tips his head, eyes meeting Mettaton's.]

You been talking to him?

[Mettaton holds Bucky's eyes for a moment but blinks, casually looking to where their knees meet. It's hard to look at him like this.]

Oh of course. I know about mirrors. I've met several while here, and those meetings haven't been pleasant.

[He looks back up at Bucky at the mention of Bucky's mirror.]

You've talked about him before. You saw him through the mirrors all those months ago, yes? What made you talk to him?

[Mettaton, admittedly, had just been curious. He hadn't been in Wonderland long at all when the mirrors had switched, giving a view into the world beyond the looking glass. They had talked and it had been relatively okay until he had brought up Napstablook. That's when he had really known about Mirror Mettaton's... nature.]

No. I haven't been talking to him.

[It's a quick and easy lie. There's only a slight twinge of guilt inside him when he says it. He won't give him up. He won't.]

Told him to keep his distance.

[Bucky had hated his own mirror as much as Steve's, the moment he'd seen them. The way they interacted, as if they couldn't stand one another. Both of their personalities so different than what he knew to be true.]

Made sure he knew that I was serious. [No one that looked and sounded like him was going to hurt anyone he cared about, no one else either if he could help it.] I don't think he really cared, but I did it. Now I keep the mirrors covered.

[His head tips and his body shifts. Was Mettaton lying? Bucky wasn't stupid. He'd looked at the mirror multiple times. That meant he was aware of his presence. Actively aware. It felt like a lie and Bucky had to swallow it down so it wouldn't ruin the tentative beginnings they just back.]

Alright.

[He sighs.]

Why you lookin' at it then?

[Mettaton nods in understanding.]

You wanted to make sure your mirror wasn't up to any funny business. That makes sense.

[That was a hell of a lot better reason than Mettaton's initial one for talking to his mirror. He notices Bucky's shift and buries the renewed twinge it causes. It's fine. They've only just started talking again. There's no need to let this sort of thing get between them for now. But if it does, well. Mettaton won't stop it this time.]

Because other mirrors have been trying to speak to me lately. I didn't have time to break this one or cover it before you came in and then it felt too awkward to suddenly stand up and break something.

[Once again, truth mixed in with a lie. The awkwardness is true. The fact that other mirrors have been talking to him is true. The lie is that they weren't being helpful. Both Alphys and Zacharie's mirrors had reached out to him in some way or form and Alphys's mirror, at least, had been worried about him on some level.

It's funny how mirrors seem to care more about him than the Reals do.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Don't cross the river if you can't swim the tide

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject