It may very well be the worst thing that's ever happened to you! | OPEN MINGLE

[vitaelamorte]

Who: EVERYONE!
Where: EVERYWHERE!
When: Friday October 27th - Tuesday October 31st
Rating: PG-13, warn if you're gonna go higher!
Summary: A catch all for the Horrible Memory Truth Event!
The Story:

For the duration of this event, everyone's entire room will be replaced with a memory playing on loop. They will likely recognize the moment as soon as they see it – it is a moment they remember as the worst moment of their entire lives. It could be a memory from home or something that happened in Wonderland. Lengths of the memories will vary, but they will find that these are not memories they can merely watch – they can step into these memories and attempt to make changes to them, and the memories will be long enough that they have time to make changes (though no more than 24 hours). However, anyone who tries will find that it is futile. No matter what you do or how hard you try, the outcome is always exactly the same somehow. No changes you make will prevent that horrible outcome. It just happens over and over and over again no matter what you do.

On top of that, perhaps complicating any attempts to make changes, everyone will be forced to be honest for the duration of the event. No lies or half-truths are allowed, and filters will be gone for the entire five days. If something bothers someone then they will blurt it out, regardless of whether or not it hurts someone's feelings, and no one will be able to simply keep quiet when they have something to say. They must be truthful and honest with every word they say.

This is a catch-all log for all of your Worst Memory needs! Please mark your threads clearly in the subject line with your character's name and Room Number + Floor for character rooms, or just location if you're making a top level for a public place in the mansion (like the tea rooms or the kitchen) so people can see if there's already a thread available. And here's the plot post if you need it!

Have fun!

Comments

[nomorules]

<sub>[Suppressing the urge to roll his eyes, he makes an offhand gesture--carry on, my liege and waits with an intent air of expectation.

With most, he wouldn't bother trying to exert any patience whatsoever, but he'd seen the horror in Mondo's face--both times, when the memory of the real Fujisaki had played out, and when the fake Fujisaki had appeared in Tartarus. Mondo had already attempted to, quite literally, die for his sins. People who don't care about repenting wouldn't do that. He's not all bad, infuriating as he can be.

But the story is a far cry from what he thought he'd get--some grudge against a cross-dressing classmate who'd bandied the word secrets around, maybe, or an equally misguided reason why he'd had to do it. It's even more of a shock to the system than walking into some kind of workshop.

Another battle royale!?]</sub>

What the fuck, man? A bear robot?

_{[He squints in strained disbelief. This sounds awfully, awfully familiar...]}

You didn't look that forced to me. And that kid didn't look like she was tryin'a kill you first.

[trabryu]

[ Mondo lets out an unamused grunt. ]

Tell me 'bout it, man. It fuckin' blasted itself off when I was gonna punch the lights outta it! Real bomb, I'm tellin' ya! ...Was lucky one classmate told me to hurl it away.

[ Well, he still died in the end, so that doesn't even really matter.

The storytelling halted as the mashed potato commented, and now Mondo's pissed off more than ever. Will there even be a time this shithead stop rubbing him the wrong way?! ]

This fucker... [ He releases the balled fist, only to attempt to grab the other by the collar. ] Does it kill you to listen to the end and shut the fuck up?! Why the fuck you keep pickin' a fight while someone's talkin'? I've already said Imma talk, so just listen, dammit!! [ He knows more than anyone else that he's at fault, he doesn't need this prick to use every chance possible to underline it. He's more than well-aware of it!

Whether or not the grabbing attempt is successful, he'll try to shove the other as he continues talking. It's not like he can stop himself from spelling out the truth. ]

Tch. The first killing motive they gave to each of us was a video. I dunno about the others', but if everyone's gettin' somethin' similar, I'm guessin' they were tryinna threaten us to kill with the safety of someone important to us in line. [ In Mondo's case, it was his team, Crazy Diamond. ] I didn't think it was real. Even now, I dunno if it was real, probably was just some stupid edits. If they could maintain the facilities in that school, they surely had enough power and money to do shit. That's what I wanna believe.

[ ...Fuck, this stupid tongue. That's one whole sentence too many. ]

Anyway! It affected one chick real bad there, and that chick apparently tried to kill this one dude. The dude then killed her.

...That dude wasn't me, by the way.

[ Just clarifying.

As much as he despises giving this asshole time to comment, he needs a breather. Just telling him this much is exhausting enough ー especially because he already knows that he's got a lot more to unpack from here on, and this nosy as fuck monkey won't let him off till he hears many, if their previous encounters are telling him anything. ]

[nomorules]

_{[Oh no, sir, don't even think that thought.]}

Why don't you practice what you preach? I told you to back the hell off me once already!

_{[Ryuji is up and out of his seat in a flash the moment the other moves to grab him, roughly swatting reaching arms aside and reclaiming personal space with a short, hard shove of his own. Like two deer clashing antlers over territorial lines, it's a warning. Get back in your place before I put you on your ass.]}

So back the hell off.

<sub>[For fuck's sake, this guy doesn't make it easy, does he? The similarities to his father are bitter ones--all Mondo would need to complete the look is a can of beer in his free hand a slur to his words to go with the clenched fist and he'd be perfectly imitating one of Sakamoto Sr.'s drunken outbursts.

It puts Ryuji at fierce odds with himself. On the one hand, it'd serve this fuckface right if he loosed the hottest edge of his feelings and burned niceties and restraint to the ground. On the other, he's aware there's enough truth in what Mondo's reluctantly divulging that it's worth holding himself back, even if he seems the only one willing or able.

He doesn't yell, or walk out. He doesn't bite back. He is, however, in an increasingly foul mood for listening to a meandering story, standing stiffly in case things should take another physical turn, his uninviting stare simmering with a banked anger.

But he tries, by god. No one can accuse him of not trying.

For his part, he's impatient to hear more. The wall of words and details and reasons and word vomit on how Billy killed Suzy in the parlor with the candlestick is illuminating--especially the robot bear bomb (the fuck?) and surgically precise threats--but it's not entirely the pea under the princess' mattress he's after. Get to the point, he narrowly avoids snapping, unsettled on top of being ticked off that Mondo should expect an attentive, well-behaved audience when he, himself, has been nothing if not difficult.

Recognizing what this is, that Mondo's under the event's sway, that he's building up to the whole picture piece by piece, he holds his traitorous tongue. Pissing on the carpet he's laying out at Ryuji's request would no doubt get him to clam up.

(And he finds he doesn't want to ask who the "chick gone bad" is, suspecting he might already know and not wanting to get into that thread of conversation, not here, not now.)

Instead he does what he's told--he listens. And for a second or two after the fact, waiting the pause out in expectant silence like a statue that's frozen in place that way. Okay. And? Mondo had wanted the peanut gallery to hold its comments until the end, hadn't he?

After a few beats pass, he relaxes his jaw and opens his mouth, if only to show he's taking in what's being said.]</sub>

They threatened you with videos of someone or something important to you so you'd "play"? So what was yours?

_{[He hadn't been planning on asking that level of personal question, but he's pissed off.]}

[trabryu]

You're the one who looked for trouble! I wasn't gonn-- [ God. ] Tch, y'know what? Forget it. [ Like hell he can stand having this fucker here any longer. He's gonna move on. Doesn't mean he's gonna budge, though ー he's not gonna back off. You don't get tell him to do shit. Whether or not he notices the impatience oozing out from the other one doesn't matter. It won't make him speed the story up. At least, he'll give all the detail he finds necessary to avoid getting thousands of questions and more, especially when the other's so set to prove his fault, even when he already admitted to that. Fucking saints. Why the hell's he even humoring him like this? Just look at that, there you go. Question number one. ] 'Twas my biker gang. It started with some video message from them, and then the next thing... it showed them on the ground, motionless. [ He shrugs, but the look in his eyes show anything but indifference. ] They ain't some second-rate in brawls, I don't buy that bullshit. --Anyway, after all that, we had to go on what they called 'class trial'. We gotta find who was the culprit, and if we didn't, we all'd get executed, vice versa. They [ Yes, they, not 'us'. He wasn't bright enough to give useful inputs, and he's aware of that. ] found the culprit, and he got executed. The rest of us gotta continue the life there. [ Ah yes, they're getting close. ] No one moved for days after, so the wacko bear got us another motive: secrets. If no one killed in 24 hours, each of our secrets would be spread all over the country. I dunno how the fuck they did it, but they figured mine out. ...That I... [ How many times have he said this since he'd gotten here? He's not getting used to this even after all that. ] ...killed my big bro. [ It's still painful to say aloud, even if it's the truth. ] You saw what happened ー part of it. ...I couldn't let the team find out, 'cuz it'd all fall apart for sure if they knew. Keeping the team together was my promise to Aniki, so I... just kept thinkin' how to prevent it all from happening. The more I thought, the deeper I was in those dark thoughts. I didn't wanna kill anyone. [ He doesn't care how hypocritical this sounds coming from him, he's just saying what he feels. ] But... Fujisaki then came to talk to me about the secrets, saying that 'this kinda thing' wouldn't bother me, 'cuz 'I was strong'. At that time, it just felt like a spit to an open wound ー like a sarcasm. 'cuz... Fujisaki was trying to change for the better. Fujisaki was strong. I... [ He grits his teeth. ] I was envious of the strength Fujisaki showed. The fucked up kinda envious that pushed me to blind rage. All I saw was black then, and before I knew it... [ There's no need to finish it, is there? A long suffering sigh leaves his lips, the look in his eyes reflecting his weariness. ] Happy now? You've gotten the full story.

[nomorules]

Not likely.

<sub>[The compulsion to be honest with his thoughts yanks the words out of him. No, he won't be forgetting. Hasn't, in fact, forgotten each growl and threat before this one.

Mondo doesn't finish his aborted sentence and Ryuji doesn't ask, because the truth of the matter is, Ryuji would be wary of him and what he's capable of no matter how the protest ended. Much as he is a fool who rushes in where angels fear to tread, he doesn't underestimate the very real possibility of danger--danger of what Mondo could do in a temper.

And yet.

Every new facet he hears about Hope's Peak and whatever had gone on there is worse than the one before it. A gang on its own wouldn't warrant sympathy, but the obvious machinations around their lives--reducing them to leverage to motivate Mondo to kill to protect them--is nauseating.

There's no justification for murder, none, but this game master had done everything he could to compel people to believe it was the only choice. Kill, or be killed and have those you care for killed.

He can't forgive the end result, but goddamn. He can understand the pressure. It's a slippery slope when you're pushed, pushed, pushed and have to make a decision that affects lives. Even Ryuji, who likes to think "commit a crime or don't commit a crime" is the easiest choice to make, isn't so blind that he can't see that.

For a while after Mondo finishes describing his blackout (and it makes a hideous sort of sense now, an application of character motivation to the two players acting out their parts in that slice of memory before), Ryuji can find nothing to say. It's not a purposeful, sardonic silence this time around, but one born of the same weariness that settles over Mondo now. It's not for the faint of heart, going down this grotesquely fucked up rabbit hole and into a world where robot bears torment high school students to their breaking points and beyond.

He almost regrets standing up; he feels like he needs to sit down and put his head between his knees.]</sub>

You didn't kill anyone before Fujisaki.

<sub>[This, finally, is muttered out as Ryuji collects himself, head down and voice faint. It's not nearly enough, not even what needs saying, but it's all that initially comes out.

Then he looks up and that anger Mondo had sparked is visibly reduced to ash in his pale, drawn face, lips pressed to a thin line.]</sub>

Happy? Nah. Ready to hurl on your floor is the better way to put it. Why'd it take you so long to say this, Oowada? Would you have if Wonderland wasn't makin' ya?

When I asked you before, you made it sound like you did it just 'cause.

_{[And maybe that had partly been Ryuji's anger assigning reasons that Mondo had refused to give. It doesn't change the how and the what, but it does change the why.]}

[trabryu]

Ah? [ Much to Mondo's surprise, the other teen actually responds the way most others did to his brother's death: denying that he was at fault. Here he was, waiting for a yapping, a speech of how he was so wrong, and that it all just proved how terrible he was. He should be glad for the lack of that right now, but he couldn't. No matter what people say, no matter how people try to frame it, it was still his fault. It was another thing that he could've prevented, like Fujisaki's death. ] But I did. [ It's the truth. It's the truth, to Mondo. ] If I didn't challenge him to the race that night, if I didn't try to overtake him, it wouldn't have happened. [ Even though it's gonna put him at the bad light again, even though he wasn't under the truth spell, he would say it ー again and again. He couldn't deny his big bro further than what he already did. ] Why? Hah. There ain't no reason. I've told you umpteenth times, I've got no reason to tell you all these shit ー 's none of your fuckin' business. But you just kept tryinna stick your nose in, so... [ He shrugs. ] You've got what you wanted. Show yourself out if you're gonna hurl. [ He doesn't bother looking at the other guy, just pointing the door with his thumb, hoping he'll leave already. ]

[nomorules]

<sub>[Ryuji is just as certain in the difference between accidents and agency and holds his ground, as well as Mondo's stare, refusing to let how uneasy the story had left him show in his eyes. They still gleam as determined as when he'd met Mondo outside the workshop door.

The heart of the other's Palace, the core of his Treasure, would be tied to his brother somehow, Ryuji's sure of it. It's heavy in the heart, seeing the domino effect through time and experience that had led from one bad decision to another--Mondo had tried so hard to deny his feelings about his brother's motorcycle accident, but in the end they'd only festered and clawed their way out as they were prone to do, a volcano set to erupt.

Fujisaki, and whatever secrets he'd tried to divulge to Mondo, had unfortunately been in the path of the eruption.]</sub>

You were a reckless idiot, that much is for effin' sure, but your brother's wreck was an accident. A terrible accident, but an accident. I saw your memory--he made the choice to save you at the last second.

<sub>[And it's all the more worse because he'd been there, he'd seen the blood seeping into cracks in the pavement and heard Mondo choking on his cries. He can't shake that--probably never will.

The few minutes he'd lived it and the conspiracy that had later cheapened it in the name of blackmail material sickens him, but not so viscerally that he has to follow Mondo's pointing finger. He'll just have to curse Ryuji's cast iron stomach.]</sub>

If you really wanna start doin' right by them, you need to follow Fujisaki's example and take responsibility for the things you can change--yourself. You've been holdin' all this shit in this long, and look where it's gotten you. Comin clean's the best thing you can do for 'em.

[trabryu]

Tch. [ There's no point arguing. Even when Jon laid down a very fair reasoning for him ー the 'real' truth ー Mondo can't find it in himself to agree. ] The fact that it was an accident doesn't excuse anything. It all rooted from my weakness. [ There's no point, but the tongue control's still in action. Much as he hates to argue further about this, they slip so easily from his mouth. It's clear for Mondo after so many encounters, that this guy's not going to back down, just like he won't. Mondo's not taking a 'no' for answer, and neither will the other. Had this been a normal time, he'd keep his mouth shut to avoid further arguments about it, alas. God, this is the worst. And what's worse than worst, the asshole's now spouting bullshit. ] Comin' clean to who? To you? What change can you do? Even if you came from the same world from me, what can you do, knowin' this? There ain't a point tellin' anyone else who ain't concerned with this. 's not like I kept all these from everyone. People who matter already know. Stop acting like you're some mentor or some shit, 's sickening.

[nomorules]

<sub>It all rooted from my weakness.

Ryuji seems to take that into solemn consideration for a moment, head canted and expression strangely subdued without the anger from earlier animating it. Had these... these head games and "class trials" not applied pressure to a weak heart the way pressure is applied to a stress point in an already weak bone, would Mondo have broken?

The realization comes to him with startling clarity then: the killing games had been doing the polar opposite of what the Phantom Thieves had worked for, hadn't they? God. Take their cause and flip it to Akechi's side of things--whispering madness and hopelessness into their ears--and you have Monokuma's competition. Manipulating people's hearts with the hope of bringing those weaknesses out and harness them. Survival of the most willing to bloody their hands and hide the fact.

Now he really does feel sick.]</sub>

... Because you wanted to prove yourself? _{[Is that it? The latticework holding together Mondo's Palace? He nods to himself as much as Mondo.]} Then let's do somethin' about that weakness, then.

<sub>[Once again, it doesn't sound so much like an offer as something he's already decided upon and merely letting Mondo in on the plan. He's no evil robot bear setting off bombs in Mondo's face, but when it comes down to relentlessly bullying people to do what they don't want to do, he and Monokuma could be fit competition for one another.

In a move he hopes might press his point a little, Ryuji concentrates until he feels blue flames and the cool confines of a mask settle over his skin. This event wants the truth? Well, here's his--his inner truth made manifest on the outside.]</sub>

I'm no fairy godmother, I'm a phantom thief. Takin' away those twisted feelings you got is kinda what I do. What I did, back home.

[trabryu]

[ Look at this shithead consistently poking his nose in to every single gap Mondo has yet to block out. ]

Why the fuck I gotta work it out with you?

[ His protest is cut short, though, because suddenly he's in for a magic show. Holy flipping what. That mask wasn't just a costume this dude owned? It just appears from thin air like that? What kinda trick did he use?! ]

..........

[ What. ]

Hah?

[ That's the only reaction Mondo can give, blank look and everything. Because like, first of all, the hell's a 'phantom thief'?! It sounds so goddamn cheesy he can't even process it. The fuck does he mean with 'taking away the twisted feeling'? How do you even do that? Is that something more ~*contextual*~ and not to be taken literally? He definitely doesn't look like a counselor or therapist... not that Mondo knows what they look like, but judging from the bleached hair and all these annoying shit being thrown at him, he doubts this fucker's something official.

...Oh. Hold up, Mondo's figured it out. ]

You're some host club dude or somethin'?

[ If yes, they sure have low standards over there. ]

[nomorules]

_{[Of all the comparisons to make...]}

What kinda hosts do you know that look like this?

<sub>[He's too incredulous at Mondo getting "host club" from skull masks and making criminals pay to be offended, crossing his arms in stupefaction. He might be giving this guy way too much credit assuming he can grasp a good opportunity when one's presented to him...

After all, it's not every day a phantom thief has to confront a person directly without the use of a calling card; it defeats the purpose of being a thief, a fact Ryuji is constantly a bit disgruntled over.

This is probably why Morgana had insisted on calling cards and subterfuge--when someone sees their change of heart coming, they make fun of it. Talk about rude?]</sub>

Try again, asswipe! I ain't some actor! I'm serious. I've dealt with real criminals, the kind who invite themselves to their own killin' games.

_{[People who make Mondo look like a misbehaving puppy.]}

[trabryu]

Shitty ones.

[ Not that he's much respect for 'other' host club dudes either. All they do is always just getting flirty with the ladies that somehow flock to them, after all. Maybe those masks are part of the 'play'. Whatever, he doesn't know and doesn't care. He just thinks that's the lamest name ever, period. ]

Yeah, sure. [ Considering this is an event where they're forced to tell the truth, Mondo'll kindly give him a benefit of the doubt. He'll let this asshole explain the crap outta himself, even if 80% of him still thinks that this is bullshit. ] Then? What the hell didja actually do?

[nomorules]

Must be. _{[Shitty, that is.]} Well, joke's on you, you're way off base.

<sub>[Why is it the people most in need of a change of heart are the ones that pitch the biggest fit about it being real? The compulsion to air his truest feelings means his eye roll is as extravagant and exasperated as the human body is capable of making.

Ah, but the question answers itself; if Mondo had his head on straight, he wouldn't be trying so hard with his sneers, and ridiculous hair, and going around pretending he's the boss of his explosive anger when it's the boss of him.

In lieu of having a Palace to slip into for a more decisive confrontation, Ryuji does the only other thing he can think of: he explains. Morgana would probably have a shit fit to hear him lay it all out in the open, but oh well. Ryuji's not the man (or the cat, as they case may be) with the plans; the best he can do is try.]</sub>

You saw a bit of it already. When we were all in each other's heads, sharin' our dreams.

_{[In the city. Where your brother died. Where your classmate died.]}

That effed up castle? It belonged to Kamoshida--that was inside 'im. Inside his heart. I was there, and I've seen inside others besides his. When people got somethin' festerin' in 'em, one of those places pops up. I'm bettin' if we took a looksie in yours, you'd have one, too. It's why you did what you did--your heart's so busy proppin' up one of them damn houses of cards, it's no wonder you ain't got time for anythin'e else.

It's why we call ourselves the Phantom Thieves of Hearts--we find those Palaces and tear 'em down.

[trabryu]

[ So, not host club dude. Well, that explains. ]

Huh.

[ Kamoshida. He faintly remembers that name. Wasn't it the guy in the picture that was displayed all over that... palace, castle, whatever that place is? Mondo can't deny that the dream realm was definitely conveying something real. At least, all his memories were real. So were Tsumiki's. No matter how fictional this guy's seemed, that was part of his memory too, wasn't it? That was... how his world was, maybe. ]

So what? You're sayin' that back in your world, you could've... [ God, saying this makes him feel gross. ] ...what, 'helped' me? Hah. What's the point of sayin' all that now? There ain't a thing you can do about it. And I'm tryin' to do what I can here. I don't need your fuckin' hand.

[nomorules]

We could've cut your ass loose from the lies you've been tellin' yourself, yeah. Changed your heart from the inside out.

<sub>[Physically. Tangibly. Nothing metaphorical about it. On the outside, the Phantom Thieves' mission sounds almost romantic--reaching into hearts and setting them free, what's more poetically high-minded than that?--but it'd been real, and more importantly, it'd worked.

Not missing a beat, Ryuji shakes his masked head abruptly, dismissing Mondo's protests before he's even finished giving voice to them.]</sub>

Oh, you better get used to seein' my face--you ain't gettin' rid of me that easily. I only wanted you to know all that so you get I ain't takin' no for an answer. You're right that I can't steal your heart the normal way without the Metaverse.

You're gonna do it yourself.

_{[His is an offer Mondo can accept either willing or unwilling, but the end result is going to be the same, Ryuji has every intention of seeing to that.]}

[trabryu]

[ Hearing that makes him feel sick. Changing people by goin' inside their hearts and takin' down their weak points and stuff? Hah! Ridiculous. ] 'Course I am! The fuck you're talkin' bout? Look, ya might feel all high and mighty for your ability back home... but do ya seriously think what ya did had any meanin'? [ At this point, he's not questioning the legitimacy of whether or not that really happened. ] What's the point if the person doesn't change on their own?

[nomorules]

Are you? _{[Skepticism is scathing enough to be a third presence in the room.]} 'Cause you sure as hell been takin' a roundabout route hidin' the guilt and coverin' up secrets.

<sub>[The proof is in his classmate's completely preventable death, and Mondo damn well knows it, just as a part of him must know that constantly lashing out and slapping open hands extended toward him does him no favors except give him more time to marinate in his self-pitying narrative of needing to hide the truth to stay strong.

This might qualify as the first time Mondo's ever given him a straight, honest explanation of events, which isn't saying much under these conditions. Honesty doesn't count when it's forced--a point he's heard directed toward the Phantom Thieves before.

What they were doing was a violation, they were just kids playing dress-up and acting out, no better than the criminals they pretended to bring to justice... There'd been so much push-back against them that Ryuji had had times where he doubted their mission. Times when the public seemed to overwhelmingly hate them and he'd wondered if disturbing the hornet's nest had been worth it when as many people were dying as they were saving.

But then he'd found out about the Grail. His eyes are open now.

Unable to help himself, he bristles a little at hearing the Grail's taunting coming out of someone else's mouth.]</sub>

Of course it did! Someone like Kamoshida was gonna get away scot free usin' the guys at our school like punchin' bags and feeling the girls' up. He thought no one was ever gonna stop him. He didn't want to stop. It took someone else to make 'him. That's what we did.

_[But...]

You're not like that.

<sub>[A distinction Ryuji doesn't hesitate to make. Kamoshida hadn't gone so far as murder, but he'd felt no guilt for the harm he had caused. Mondo had, and guilt seems to be the mortar holding together every crack and crevice of the wall he's built.

Both are capable of change of heart. With Mondo, it might just have to be less traditional.]</sub>

If you seriously wanna start puttin' things right, then this way could work for you. But only if you really mean it. It starts with admittin' you need help. You can't do it by hidin' the truth from people.

[trabryu]

[ Mondo grunts annoyedly. ]

God. Don't you fuckin' get it? I told people who matter. Why the fuck should I tell you? [ Like okay, technically this asshole saved Mondo's life and shit, he knows that, but for the umpteenth time: he didn't ask for it! He's not gonna 'pay' for something he didn't even ask for! This is just like those cheap frauds delinquents do on the streets! ] Even if ya don't tell me shit, I was gonna figure things out on my own! [ Back the fuck off, busybody.

He doesn't comment further about the 'Phantom Thieves'. If that works to stop those kinda people, whatever, then. It's not like he could offer a better way to stop people who'd become far gone. In fact, for a brief moment, just for a split second, he wondered if these phantom thieves could've cleaned up Monokuma and the organisation behind it if they existed in his world.

But nah. That's too much credit for 'em. Too much credit for this dude. ]

Duh. I already know I need help. But not from you. Look, there's no point tryinna get someone who don't have the proper knowledge for these shit, ya know? 'm not just sayin' this to fuck with you. It's... probably got somethin' to do with the stuff here, I dunno. [ He taps on his temple. ] I wanna know how to control that anger... it could happen again, and I don't wanna hurt people for no reason. [ Fuck this truth serum. Stop his tongue, goddammit. ]

[nomorules]

_{[What a shock, what he's saying has gone in one ear, gotten turned around in that rat's nest of a hairdo for a while, and come out the other. Ryuji claps back with steely command in his voice.]}

All you're doin is arguin' to argue! Take your own advice and quit runnin' your mouth for a hot! Why don'tcha take a breath and think about where this is actually comin' from.

_{[A heavy exhale. If Mondo won't deep breathe to get himself under control, he will.]}

It ain't even about me and you damn well know it ain't. I've met worse people than you--I could help you if you just let the bullshit go. This is about you. You and your teammates you were too scared to tell the truth to 'cause you were busy tryin'a fit this image you thought you had to be for your brother.

That part of you tryin'a hold it together don't wanna accept help 'cause it'd mean you'd hafta let people see past it. But there's that other part of you that wants to find a way to let those feelings go. C'mon, Oowada. Which one are you gonna listen to?

[trabryu]

[ Arguing for the sake of arguing? Hah. That's one funny theory. He doesn't even want to have this conversation altogether! Guess the fact that this asshole's able to see within people's hearts made him feel that he knows everything about everyone, huh? ]

Whoa, you sure know me well.

[ It's impossible to miss out the sarcasm in his tone ー he's making it as obvious as possible. It's not about him? Then what's this constant barging in even when Mondo already states clearly that he's aware of his need of help, just not from him? ]

Tell me then, y'can help me, how?

[ Who the hell does this fucker think he is, thinking he can be of any more help than the others? Some psychological expert? ]

[nomorules]

_{[Undeterred, Ryuji juts his chin out.]}

Then you tell me I'm completely off base. Tell me what it's really about.

<sub>[He doesn't think he's wrong, though. If anything, Mondo side-stepping the conversation reinforces the impression of someone playing keep-away with their Treasure, holding tight to it even as they refuse to talk about it. For a guy who lives and breathes confrontation in every other aspect of his life insofar as Ryuji has seen, it's telling.

Maybe Mondo does feel threatened by this ambush coming from him and not someone else. Or maybe Mondo feels threatened because Ryuji's in the general ball park.

As answer to his question:]</sub>

I haven't given up on you yet, for starters.

<sub>[And how many people can he say that about? The people who matter stay and fight for you--it's life's litmus test for finding out who your real friends are. If Mondo has bonds like that in Wonderland that can help him shave off this chip on his shoulder, all the better for his rehabilitation.

But not everyone would. Not everyone does.

Ryuji's still be here, pushing the point. He's not Mondo's friend, but he's committed by virtue of being a phantom thief. Whether his intervening is wanted or not, that counts for something.]</sub>

[trabryu]

[ Mondo raises an eyebrow. It's not a completely surprising response, since the dude's been barging into his emotional personal space, but he was expecting yet another argument. He definitely can give some credit for the tenacity ー this whole chasing down has been going on since last month, and there's no much merit in it for this fucker apart from the ego-feeding thing. Unless the ego means a lot to him, then well. ]

Hah. Feelin' like a good person for not givin' up?

[ It's still way too difficult for him to trust this guy now. It feels like he's shown him too many of his cards without seeing the opposite.... not that he wants to.

That's exactly what puts him in a disadvantage in this particular situation, though ー with how he's forced to tell the truth ー as he has nothing to ask, while this guy keeps asking more and more questions. If only there's an option to mum himself or some shit.

With a grunt and heavy sigh, he responds. ]

It ain't so much I don't wanna accept help as much as I wanna get a proper help before anythin'. Proper as in people who actually understand all these things about controlling emotions and shit... dunno what they're called. But maybe there's one or two 'round here, who knows.

[ And what can you do, in that retrospect? Mondo highly doubts the guy has something he's looking for. ]

I told you, I don't wanna hurt people for no reason.

[nomorules]

_{[The rhetorical question might only be a jab, but Ryuji cocks his head, considering it.]}

I wouldn't be a very good person if I gave up, so yeah. I guess you could say that. It don't take the Metaverse or special powers to do somethin' about somethin', I learned that bein' a phantom thief. Try me--I know a lot more than you think.

<sub>[The skeletons in Mondo's closet and his explosive anger were the reasons he was stepping in, not the reasons he would back down; to Ryuji, that's an important distinction and he assumes that's what the other is getting at until professional help enters the equation.

That surprises him. Professional help as in... therapists and shit? That's the last recourse he would've expected Mondo to take, let alone voluntarily bring up on his own. It's not an unpleasant surprise, just... a surprise.]</sub>

Are you talkin' about therapy?

[trabryu]

[ Well actually, he meant to be sarcastic. So when he gets this honest answer... he isn't too sure how to react. Scoffing is the only thing he can do ー no smartass counter, no nothing. As much as this guy annoys the living hell out of him, he'd give some cookie points for that honesty. ]

Ah?

[ Therapy? Is that what people call it? ]

Yeah, prolly? Heck if I know. ...What, you know someone who deals wit' those?

[ Well... this shithead might know more than Mondo thought, like he said. Prove yourself to be useful, manhole face. ]

[nomorules]

<sub>[Heck if he knows, either. Head shrinking is one of those things people tend not to talk about--or at least, he hasn't met anyone yet who goes to therapy.

Is Mondo serious? He can't be lying, but it just seems bewildering Mondo would consider talking to a strange doctor when he's been so obstinate about holding even a normal conversation at room volume. Unsure what to make of this, Ryuji shifts his weight to one foot, crossing his arms in a thoughtful pose.]</sub>

Not me!

_{[He just confessed he steals people's emotions for a living, he's not the person to ask where the normal healthcare professionals are hiding.]}

But if you're for real about it... We all come from a zillion different worlds, there's gotta be someone. You'd really be honest with a doctor?

_{[Well, it's not the police, but... it's something. More than he expected.]}