+ Guilt Runs Deep

[vitaelamorte]

Who: Everyone!
Where: The Mansion
When: Feb 23-25
Rating: Please warn in top level subject lines for potential triggers/NSFW
Summary: Various residents are trapped in their own guilt, watching their guiltiest memory play on a loop.
The Story:

Welcome to the gathering post for the event. Please see the plotting post for more information + the bulletin board link. Have fun!

Comments

[powerofmabel]

We need to get you out of here. [Mabel wraps her arms around herself, suddenly. She knows how this works now, but looking around she can't really figure out what to say to make it better. It's kind of a lot without a whole lot of context.]

[adaptiveimmunities]

[He gives them a brief, incredulous look before his gaze slides to the glow in the distance again.] Believe me, I've been trying. I even tried to turn the bike toward Oakland, instead of away, just to see if I could, and I can't. Nothing changes.

[krmvgivv]

Cause it's not real. [They've been through this already with Stan and Mabel. Dipper spreads his hands in front of him, trying not to look at the glow.] It may have happened, but it didn't happen here. It's just... Wonderland torturing you.

[powerofmabel]

Yeah, Wonderland wants you to feel bad about stuff you can't do anything about. It's stupid.

[She kicks an errant rock on the ground as if she can personally punish this memory for hurting Shaun.]

[adaptiveimmunities]

I figured it was a Wonderland thing, and it's pretty clear I can't do anything to change it. [Considering he's tried.] So how do I stop it before the loop starts again?

[Which is going to be pretty soon, given where they are in the memory.]

[krmvgivv]

You gotta forgive yourself. [Dipper glances at Mabel, then back to Shaun.] You've gotta get yourself to believe you don't deserve this.

[powerofmabel]

Which you don't. [Mabel nods.] You're a good person.

[adaptiveimmunities]

[He grimaces.] I don't really know if I'm a good person. [Maybe he doesn't deserve to relive this moment over and over, but it doesn't make him a good person. He smiles a little at Mabel.] But thanks. [The fact that she somehow believes he is means a lot, since she actually is a good person.]

So, what? I click my heels together three times and say "Fuck off this wasn't my fault?"

[krmvgivv]

I mean, I don't know if you're a good person either, but I do know someone else deciding to sacrifice themself to save your life isn't your fault.

[He gestures towards the burning city.]

And I'm pretty sure anyone who cared about you enough to do that wouldn't want you torturing yourself like this.

[powerofmabel]

[You'd think after Wonderland, Mabel would adapt to swearing and not earmuff herself every time an f-bomb is dropped, but it's still instinctive.]

Yeah, if it were me, I'd be kinda cheesed off you were wasting time feeling sorry for yourself instead of going out there and saving the world and honoring my noble sacrifice or... something.

[She's trying okay?? This is way bigger than anything she has context for. The closest she can come to is Stan's sacrifice, and she forced that back to rights. This can't be forced. Narrative causality does not bend to the whims of the people in this story.] I'm... way in over my head here. You still shouldn't feel bad.

[adaptiveimmunities]

You guys didn't know Dave. He'd probably be okay with me torturing myself at least a little.

[But he sees their point, and rationally (and he hates being rational sometimes), it' snot actually his fault that the CDC decided that killing him and his team was worth the cost of wiping out several city blocks.

He sighs.]

Not this much, though.

[And just like that, it's over. we tend to our wounded we count our dead The scene fades away and they're just in a hallway in the Mansion.]

[krmvgivv]

[Dipper sighs with relief.] Phew. That got pretty intense. You have a pretty intense life.