entrancelogs | [OPEN] your very own mental breakdown

Who: Ned the Pie Maker and YOU
Where: first-floor kitchen
When: FIRST DAY OF THE EVENT; June 27th
Rating: PG to PG-13
Summary: kjsbdjLKADHJFKMWHY
The Story:

Why?

[Ned awoke to the event feeling the same way he does every other day when he wakes up: normal, slightly sluggish, and needing a quiet jolt of caffeine to his system. The abnormality in the early morning rise came in the form of a bona-fide swarm of diminutive dogs - puppies, to be exact - all of whom looked exactly like miniature versions of Digby.

But it isn't the frequent in-kitchen canine collisions that have him so bent out of shape, like a pipe cleaner twisted too far to be returned to its original perfectly pointy and straight form. No, it is that Ned has retrieved his usual assortment of rotten fruit from a special cooler in the back, intending to bake them into today's batch of pies, and that his first touch to a particularly moldy strawberry has yielded...

...nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

The power that has plagued him, consumed his life and dictated his actions for so long, is simply...gone. That cannot be, he thinks, reaching for a handful of blueberries and, for his troubles, receives nothing more than mildew and mush.]

No.

[The kiwis, the bananas, the cherries and apples. All of them, the same result. All of them varying unappetizing shades of brown, gray, and green.

Ned is not yet certain what frustrates him more, the fact that his terrifying Gift refuses to work in a place where no one knows him, or the fact that his terrifying Gift refuses to work and he isn't at home in The Pie Hole, with Chuck, pulling her into a kiss to celebrate his ability to touch her the way he never could.]

No, no no no...no, not here. Why- ...why?! Why now? Why not- wh-why not...

[Why not at home, where it really matters most?]

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Waves? What waves? What are you talking about?

[In his usual fashion when defending himself, Ned folds his arms over his chest and and leans up against the counter. In the hopes of diverting attention from anything off about him, it's better to keep the conversation on Hana's own strange proclamations.]

Your waves.

[She points at her head.]

I can hear them, emitting from you. From everyone. But yours are the loudest today, and filled with the most grief.

[For an instant - perhaps even several seconds - Ned's utter confusion at Hana's words grows, expands like a balloon rapidly being filled with air. For that long moment, the Pie Maker stares at the girl with the serious demeanor, half-expecting her to admit that she is simply teasing him.

She's isn't. She can see- she can do something. Something no one else can.]

What- [His concern for himself lessens somewhat as he tries to occupy his mind with the only other thing it can clutch onto.] ...what do they look like? Or- or sound like?

They're being squished with your concern and curiosity... which is understandable.

[Keep in mind she says these things as if she's merely reading off a book page. Her voice never wavers, simply stating things as they are.]

I'm no mind reader, if that's what you're thinking. I have no idea what's causing your misery. I only know that you are miserable. That whatever's happened is barely being restrained. You'd scream it, if you weren't with people.

...I would scream,

[he replies with no small amount of dismay, because it is all the self-control that Ned can muster not to vocalize his frustration with anguished yelling.

Quickly wiping at his eyes - which have no doubt begun to well up at the edges - Ned takes a shaky breath.]

You're- You're not wrong, it's just- it's not important. I'm...homesick.

It is important. You are a good person. And good souls like yours... don't deserve the torment that's ripping you apart.

[She's only a hugger when it comes to her close friends and family, and she's not even sure he'd be comfortable with one. But she wants to offer some sort of condolences. She takes off her black cape, and offers it to him, in lieu of a handkerchief.]

Cry. Let it out.

[As unquestionably odd as it is that Tohru's quiet, unassuming (and slightly creepy) friend is offering him her sympathies, they come without question or extended inquiry and that is precisely the sort of unobtrusive understanding that Ned needs.

Slumped against the counter he nods slowly, sliding down the side to the floor with his long limbs askew and his head in his hands. Hana doesn't ask. There isn't any supposition. She just holds out her little black cape and he takes it, burying his face in weird-smelling fabric.]

It's so stupid, [he whispers between jagged gasps for air.] So...so stupid...

[She kneels down next to him, her hands on her lap. She wants to ask what's going on, but it's far too soon, when he's being swallowed up by his own sadness. She watches him, curious but not prodding.]

If you wish it, I won't tell Tohru, or anyone, of what I'm seeing and hearing. But I will stay here as long as you wish it. And I believe you will need it for some time.

[A number of small, long-haired golden retrievers cluster around them, as friendly puppies are wont to do, but Ned can't bring himself to touch any of them. They only serve to remind him of the day Digby was hit by a truck, the day Ned touched his dead dog in the road and something tingled and sparked at the end of his finger, the day Digby came back to life.

Ned lifts his head, but doesn't speak for a long moment. He simply looks at her, arms wrapped around his knees, chin resting on black cloth.]

...please don't- please don't tell anyone.

[She idly scratches the head of one of the puppies, but other than that doesn't pay attention to them.]

Then this will be another secret for me to keep.

[Angel the vampire, Bigby the wolf, and Ned the... horrible past he refuses to mention. Interesting trio.]

Take your time in your grief. There is no judgement here.

[Ned the necromancer. It has a certain ring to it, doesn't it?]

It isn't- [Ned's protests fall short, because he hasn't accidentally shared his gift, and he has absolutely no problem expressing his feelings...when he's by himself, that is. And it's better that Tohru doesn't know about the ungainly sobbing.]

It's...okay. I mean, it's not- it's not okay, but- yeah.

[Just shut up, Ned.]

[She slowly nods. Perhaps she can distract him with a tale. It may not make him feel better, but it has to be better than curling up in your own self-loathing.]

... My ability, to hear waves... I've had it since I was a child. But back then, I couldn't control it. So... I was always hearing everyone's waves. It was like a theater of people in my mind, every day. I couldn't go outside, as all the voices made me so sick...

[Ned finds his self-loathing somewhat comforting - at least it's consistent. Brow furrowed, he listens to the strangely dark girl about her strangely dark power.]

I guess...being assaulted by people's emotions all the time could get...could get stressful.

[Not that Ned has experience in that.]

I was blessed with an understanding family... they did their best to adjust to my pain.

But at school... I was bullied. They called me a witch. The children held me down, and told me witches eat lizards... so they forced one down my throat.

The leader of the boys... He laughed so hard. And in that moment, all I wanted was for him to die.

... And he almost did.

[She closes her eyes.]

... My powers stopped his heart. He was in the hospital for a long time.

[What a discomfiting segue.

Similarly, Ned remembers being bullied - and beaten up, but that only took one time to get him to keep from interacting too intimately with other students. He never wished an extreme amount of ill will on the boys, although he resented them, and hearing that Hana blames herself for someone's near-death experience is uncomfortably familiar.

Except his accident ended in two actual deaths. It could be waved away as a coincidence, that the boy Hana disliked so much simply had a weak heart and it had nothing to do with her power, but Ned knows not to be that optimistic.]

...did he come out okay?

[OPEN] your very own mental breakdown

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