+ Guilt Runs Deep

[vitaelamorte]

Who: Everyone!
Where: The Mansion
When: Feb 23-25
Rating: Please warn in top level subject lines for potential triggers/NSFW
Summary: Various residents are trapped in their own guilt, watching their guiltiest memory play on a loop.
The Story:

Welcome to the gathering post for the event. Please see the plotting post for more information + the bulletin board link. Have fun!

Comments

Wirt | OTA

[singloversing]

[Wirt's weekend is...surprisingly ordinary?

He's been bracing himself, of course. The treacle girls showed up on the network, so something is going, and probably something bad based on how they were talking. He's always been awful at guessing events, but maybe they'll have to compulsively tell the truth?

So far, he hasn't noticed anything though. His room is normal. He feels normal. Or is this one of those events where Wonderland makes him feel like he's acting normally when he's actually being super weird? He probably wouldn't know, but...everything feels the way he remembers it. The only thing that seems all that different is that Wonderland is a little quieter. There don't seem to be as many people around.

He can easily be found in his room, in the library, or in the kitchen. He's certainly not trapped anywhere, but he also doesn't seem to know yet that something's happening at all. It's just an ordinary day as far as he's concerned.]

1/2

[krmvgivv]

[Dipper knows Wirt's got major anxiety that crops up at the least convenient times. That means as soon as he's helped Mabel break out of her loop, they charge to Wirt's room as fast as they can. Which is pretty fast since they're neighbors.]

WIRT! [Dipper crashes through the door.] It's not real! Wonderland's just messing with you!

[...huh, Wirt's guiltiest memory looks pretty much like a normal day. Is he unaffected or is his anxiety just that strong?]

[powerofmabel]

[Mabel is right behind him, holding a canteen in one hand and a blanket in another.] I've got an emergency blanket and hot chocolate! It's gonna be okay!

[...And she pauses as soon as she gets a look at the room, confusion giving way to panic.] Oh no, Dipper! He's guilty about existing.

[singloversing]

[Wirt had been minding his own business, sitting curled up on his bed with a copy of Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass. His room is the same as it's always been - a strange mix of antique furniture on top of a bad orange rug from the seventies that makes it clear that Wirt pulled all of the obscure historical pieces he's always wanted out of the closet and put it in a proxy of his bedroom at home. Every surface is a mess and there's finished poetry taped in some spots on the walls.

When they burst in the room he predictably startles enough to drop his book, but...he looks more confused than guilty.]

Uhhh. ...What are you guys talking about? [He gasps.] Wait, is this one of those events where I don't know there's an event happening to me?!

[krmvgivv]

Yeah, there's an event! Wonderland's pulling our guilty memories out and making us relive them!

[Dipper rushes forward, clambering onto Wirt's bed and looking at him anxiously.]

Is it that book? Did you steal it or something? Wirt, it's okay, I'm sure you didn't mean any harm.

[powerofmabel]

Did you rob a museum? [Mabel has seen his room, though she's never really questioned the antiquities beyond them proving without a shadow of a doubt that Wirt's taste is suspect. And now she's looking at them in a new light.] Are you secretly a cat burglar? We totally won't judge if you are. Dipper almost killed two FBI guys once and he's fine with it, so committing crimes isn't as bad as people think.

[....Her Stan is showing.]

[singloversing]

[As soon as Dipper explains the event, Wirt is right back to being confused. Mabel isn't helping much either.]

What? No! Why would I burgle anything?! [Wirt tries to scoot back but there isn't very much farther back he can scoot.] I-I mean I got it from the library this morning, but I'm just borrowing it.

[Granted, he has not returned a single library book on purpose in his time in Wonderland - they all just kind of disappear eventually. That's not stealing, right? It does reveal one thing though. He's already left his room since the event started.]

Is this why there's been like, no one around the mansion today?

[krmvgivv]

[Unless he's been RELIVING borrowing that book again and again! Dipper squints.]

Yeah, some kind of guilty memory thing. Are you... guilty about borrowing books from the library?

[powerofmabel]

Do you have a lot of late fees hanging over your head? That happened to me once and the shame was unbearable.

[And yet, not her guilty memory, because she got over it quickly. Actually, maybe Dipper was the one more ashamed by her forgetfulness.]

[singloversing]

No? I don't think you can even have late fees in Wonderland? At home I do, but it's not that big a deal - they just don't let you take out any more books until you bring them back and pay it. I-It's a little embarrassing, but...that's not really the same as guilt.

[Especially since there isn't really a huge waiting list for the kinds of books Wirt takes out. Usually it's more that he'll forget to bring it back for weeks and weeks.]

[krmvgivv]

[Dipper was glaring at Mabel because yeah, he sure remembers that, but he stops and frowns at Wirt.]

Wait, are you... not affected?

[powerofmabel]

[Mabel gapes like a fish.]

You don't feel guilty about anything? But you're like... [she flails her hands] ...Anxiety in human form!

[entreats]

[ Honestly, Ange is considering herself to be pretty lucky that nothing weird seems to be happening to her. Since it is pretty obvious that something weird is going on with other people.

But that just makes it stand out even more when she finds someone who isn't trapped in some weird hallucinatory dramatic tense moment. Like Wirt. Who is just.. sitting there in the library when Ange shows up there to take a break from jumping into people's awful memories to go read.

Not that she shows any signs of it feeling kind of weird to see someone so normal. She just greets him like usually - not many signs of emotion showing on her face. ]

Hey. [ Like it's just any ordinary day, but of course Ange has to ruin it with a dumb deadpan remark-- ] Not busy dying?

[ Listen, most of the memories she's seen don't involve death, but it's the easiest way to summarize it in a deadpan way, alright. ]

[singloversing]

[Wirt looks up from his book when he hears someone coming. The lack of others makes the entire library feel even quieter than it normally is. it feels like a ghost town, which is both unsettling and soothing in different respects.]

Oh, hey.

[The deadpan remark is a precision strike, but not one he was expecting so bluntly. But in a way, that's not really true either - in the last few months, he's come to expect Ange to be a little blunt.]

H-Ha, uh. I guess not? ...I'm as surprised as anyone else, really.

[Once he learned what the event actually was, he couldn't believe he didn't wake up inside some horrible, guilty memory. That's the kind of thing that usually happens to him in Wonderland, to the point where not only have people had to rescue him, but they assumed they would have to rescue him.

It's so strange to just...be okay, for once.]

[entreats]

Seems like we're the lucky ones then.

[ It's a little less deadpan, since.. well, it's just true. Enough people seem to be trapped in those weird.. - loops? Memories? Whatever they are - that neither of them seeming to be stuck in one is pretty lucky in comparison. It still sounds pretty nonchalant though, since it's much easier to seem like you don't care about what's happening when no one is suffering right in front of you.

Ange grabs a book from a nearby bookshelf before taking a seat as well.

Not.. that she's actually reading it yet though. She's just letting it lay there on the table closed up as she speaks up to Wirt again. ]

Is that why you were surprised? Since it seems so few people are unaffected?

[singloversing]

Well...sort of?

[He sets his book down to match, showing he doesn't mind the interruption exactly. With half the mansion trapped by their own guilt his own anxiety is relatively low, but there also haven't been as many people around to theorize what's going on.]

I don't think there's anyone that has literally never felt guilt in their lives at all, so it's kind of weird Wonderland just skipped some people? Like, I definitely have things to feel guilty about, so it doesn't make any sense. But...I guess Wonderland never does, really.

[entreats]

[ Ange definitely nods at that. If there's anything you could say about Wonderland and be 100% sure about it, it's that it's completely nonsensical. ]

If there is some sense behind it, then maybe it has to do with resolved guilt or unresolved guilt. I've had things I felt super guilty about in the past, but I've already worked through those, so I guess that's why it didn't affect me. [ Not that she doesn't still have a whole slew of issues, but sshh, no need to bring that up. Just.. not guilt-related ones. ] Do you still feel guilty for the things you felt guilty about before?

[singloversing]

I'm not really sure?

[That answer sounds so silly to him though. Guilty is something you are or aren't, isn't it?]

I-I mean, I thought I was. If anyone had asked if I did I would have said yes, and I still feel bad for doing or not doing things, but...that makes sense. The thing I thought I would have relived is resolved. I still feel bad that I messed up, but it's not the same feeling anymore.

[It's hard to feel truly guilty when he knows the actual outcome. He knows his brother is going to be okay, so there's less to feel guilty about.]

[entreats]

Hmm. That's probably the difference then between us and people who got involved in this whole mess.

[ She nods a little to herself. Hey, it kind of feels good to find something that might just be a rational answer to something in this place for once. But then again, who's to say she won't find someone within the next half hour who totally contradicts it? ]

I guess it's just normal though to still feel kind of bad about it anyway. [ Even if it's not the same feeling. She gets it. ] If you didn't feel bad about those things at all, you'd have to be some sort of sociopath.

[singloversing]

Yeah, I guess so.

[He doesn't offer more about what his situation was, but to his credit he doesn't ask about hers either. He just accepts that they're both emotionally in similar places without prying.]

Though it's kind of weird that more people aren't in our boat? That's kind of...I don't know. I wouldn't have guessed that many people have things they're this guilty about, but it's so quiet. There's been like no one around, so...it must have hit a lot of people.

[entreats]

[ Ange is kind of idly flipping the cover of the book in front of her open and closed while she's listening to him before shrugging a bit. ]

I don't know if you've noticed, but most people here are weird. [ Yes, that's blunt, but.. also true! She's not even leaving herself out of this equation. Or Wirt, considering his weird stories about going to hell or some underworld and all. ] The weirder your life is, the greater chance you get stuck with some sort of emotional trauma, I suppose.

[singloversing]

That makes sense. And like, I totally wouldn't have called my situation normal before I got here? But weighing it next to some of the things other people have been through...I don't know. It's like, comparatively normal.

[He's not dealing with an apocalypse or zombies or some greater destiny thing. Literally everyone in Wonderland's gotten kidnapped to another plane of existence, even if it wasn't to a world that might be purgatory.]

Everyone's weird, it's just a spectrum of weird.

[entreats]

Calling it "comparatively normal" is kind of generous, I'd say.

[ Although she does kind of agree that there's a spectrum when it comes to these things, but it's difficult to weigh all these different situations against each other when they're all so very different. ]

I'd say about 99.9% of the people who walked around in my world would say your situation, or what you've told me about it, is very, very weird.

[testcase]

[This is weirdly...normal compared to some of the other things going on, so when Junko runs into this guy in the library, she'll just ask the most obvious question.]

So you got to skip out on whatever's going on too?

[singloversing]

[Wirt actually doesn't recognize the person talking to him, and looks a little surprised. She must be talking to him though, since there's no one else around.]

Yeah, I guess so. I-It's kind of weird though, that some people just get to sit out? N-Not that I'm complaining! It's just...weird.