Feel the Magic Rise

[urnewkingbitch.livejournal.com]

Who: Dave Strider, Bro Strider, John Egbert, Santana Lopez, Dean Winchester, Puck, maybe a wild Baby Penguin Kurt Hummel
Where: Tearoom
When: Tuesday, October 25th
Rating: T for sexual explanations and language
Summary: Sex Education 101 is now beginning!
The Story: Dave just sent out a text a couple hours ago for the "teachers" to get their materials together for the sex ed class. They were doing it, man, they were making it happen. He also gave them the time and the place.

Now, all they needed were the "pupils."

Comments

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

In true Strider fashion, Bro's late to arrive - by which, he arrives exactly when he intends to. Lil Cal's chilling not too far away and he's also set up some smuppets in some...interesting positions.

Now all he needs is his victim student.

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

John can't help but look anywhere else when he notices Bro's smuppets. Seriously, was that really necessary?

Still, he appreciates his showing up. It's nice of him. Or at least he hopes it is.

"So...guess you've done this before, huh?"

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

Of course the smuppets were necessary. What better teaching aids could there be?

And of course, Bro's here with the best of intentions. His intentions are never usually the problem, it's more the execution. And of course he still has his shades on so it's hard to read his expression. Just what you need in a teacher, right John?

"'Bout once a year since the little dude was old enough to care."

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"...Did he forget?" John glances at Dave. He knows Dave won't really emote or anything but he's still kind of curious. Is he just super forgetful or what?

Seriously, why isn't once enough? Or how about never? John would be okay in that column. The "never" column.

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Nah, but a refresher's always good just in case. Gotta keep on top of these things, you know?"

Otherwise they end up like, well. John.

"So what is it you're not quite getting, exactly?"

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"Does sex...change all that often?" What is it like video games? Is that what the magazines are for? Coming soon, Vagina Sex Part 2: Electric Boogaloo.

Wow, he really needs to stop thinking like that.

"Uh...I guess the like. Fitting together of...pieces. And the rules. Like, um, I guess it's rude to ask people what they like? I mean, boys or girls." Kurt didn't seem to happy when he asked...

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Depends who you're with. Basics are pretty much the same but that don't mean you can't forget. 'Sides, makes for a good excuse to make sure there aren't any worries floating about in little bro's head, you know?"

The fact that such a point is this far down the list of priorities probably speaks volumes.

"Well, there's a way about asking if that's what you mean. Some people ain't too happy about people they don't know too well all up in their business. Bit of common sense goes a long way, you know. You don't just stride up to someone asking 'em where they like to stick their meatstick."

And having segued into that topic via questionable word choice...

"As for the parts thing...I'm guessing you mean when it comes to the non-heterosexuals. I mean, I figure you gotta at least know enough to know chicks and dudes are different down there."

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

Eww. Meatstick. But John recovers a little faster from that wording than he might've before. He's probably getting desensitized to all this stuff, for better or worse.

"I think I get most of that stuff, yeah. It's just...I mean, I've seen pictures of girls together." Blush, shuffle feet. "But I guess I don't see what they like about it? And same with guys, I mean, don't you need..."

He laces his fingers together. "Girls and guys fit together, I don't know."

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

Well, at least he wasn't a completely hopeless case. Still, Bro figures he's got a way to go just yet.

"Biggest mistake you're making, that sex is all about slotting the key in the lock. I mean sure, that's a big part of it but it ain't the whole show. Whole lot of other stuff you can get up to - or get off to. That bit's the important bit when it comes to girls who've sworn off the dick. That and if penetration's really an issue, if fingers can't do the talking, plenty of toys out there to fill the void."

Literally. But wait, he hasn't finished yet.

"As for two guys, well, that's just a matter of same key, different lock."

And now he'll give that a moment to sink in, see if it clicks.

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

John stares for a while, trying to process everything. It makes sense, sure. Of course it does. Puck tried to explain it, after all.

John may have zoned out for that though.

But now he's finally manning up and concentrating. No more running away. Stop that, brain!

Think.

Think!

"...Oh."

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Oh?"

That's all Bro's giving. It's an unspoken prompt for an explanation of that oh, because the last thing any of them needs is for John to have got the completely wrong end of the handle.

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"As in, 'Oh, I get it.'"

John knows that's not what Bro wants, though. He ducks his head, fingers gripping his knees tightly.

"...I don't wanna say it out loud."

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Only need it loud enough that I can hear it. You wanna whisper it to me, that's okay."

He doesn't remember Dave ever being this shy, but then John didn't have the dubious benefit of being raised by Bro. Thus a more delicate approach is needed.

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"They use their butt?"

He hopes that's loud enough because that was hard.

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Got it in one, kid. You're quicker than I thought you were gonna be, I'll give you that."

Since the way Dave had sold it, Bro was convinced they'd still be on the "why girls and boys are different" page at this point.

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"I'm not stupid...I just don't listen very well, I guess."

Okay, that wasn't a good comeback.

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

And Bro knows it. Still, he just shrugs.

"Didn't have anything but Dave's word to go on. Might wanna take it up with him."

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"Yeah..."

John looks down, suddenly a little peeved. Dave really told a lot of people about this, didn't he? God, that was so embarrassing! What a jerk!

...Who wanted to help him.

Uh.

"I can't tell if I'm mad at him for all this or not."

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

Bro shrugs. "Well, I can't tell you how to feel but he only did it to help you. Don't let it come between you, is all."

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"Yeah..." John glances over at Dave, and like always he can't tell if Dave's looking back. Stupid shades. "You're right."

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Always am. Goes with being a Strider."

He's smirking, but his tone's light.

"Anything else before we call time?"

[hamburellakind.livejournal.com]

"Um, no. I think next time I'll just...ask instead of assuming anything." John laughs, scratching his neck awkwardly. "I mean, I guess I know who the experts are now."

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

"Good plan. Know what they say about assume, don't you? And little bro pretty much found you the best people you could hope for. It's like sex ed's the hottest shit nightclub and you got a VIP ticket to a private session."

[thisisherson.livejournal.com]

As soon as Kurt sees the smuppets, he shuts his eyes. And doesn't open them again. He never wants to see them again, but if this goes like the rest of this day has, he won't be given any other options.

"Is this class over yet?" he whines to whoever will listen.

[coolstriderbro.livejournal.com]

Bro shrugs. Honestly, he's not sure who this other kid is and really he signed on for John's benefit but hey, he's a generous guy. He doesn't mind sharing a little wider.

"Hey, I ain't forcing you to be here. But this is a once in a lifetime chance to get the lo-down, Strider style so now's the time to hit me up with any questions."