OPEN | well, i don't know where they come from but they sure do come

[circlejerked]

Who: Everyone and some adorable, rolly polly, purring kittens.
Where: Ballroom.
When: April 4th.
Rating: PG? It's kittens, how bad can it get.
Summary: As advertised, Anders wished for some kittens, now there are kittens, please adopt a kitten, kittens everywhere.

The Story:

<sub>[In the ballroom with plenty of space for them to romp around, Anders and Alistair set the kittens loose.

When he'd been thinking about them, Anders had had a particular image in his mind: a bunch of kittens sitting in a padded wicker basket like something out of a graphic illustration or inspired by a toilet paper brand. Who wouldn't find that adorable? That's exactly what he'd gotten, and exactly what they load the kittens up in to move them downstairs. Once the basket is deposited in the center of the room, some stay napping in its cushioned confines, others tumble out to explore.

Anders takes the time to bring up food, water, and litter. After some internal debating, he scatters some cat toys around the room, too. Welcome to Wonderland's one and only kitty daycare, for a limited time only!]

(OOC: Don't worry about threading with Anders or Alistair if you want to join in just for kittens. Consider this a mingle log where you can make your own posts, tag around, etc.)</sub>

Comments

OTA

[circlejerked]

I. Fourth Floor

<sub>[The cat rodeo has come to the fourth floor and the main event is literal cat herding. Ever tried to keep track of a bunch of small animals after they've spilled out of your closet like packing peanuts? It's harder than it looks!

Reinforcements had arrived in the form of Alistair (banging on someone's door and shoving cats in their face is a good way to get them involved in your problems), but it's still a trial to keep the kittens in one place for any length of time. Anyone in the vicinity might have an energetic kitten scamper across their path, or see Anders himself trying to catch them or coax them to him with a "here, kitty-kitty."]</sub>

II. Ballroom

<sub>[Anders is, simply put, in heaven.

Once the cats have been rounded up, that means it's time to play with them. All of them. As many as he can, anyway. And they're all so cute, every single one! Dotingly, he scoops food into dishes, rolls balls across the floor, gently pries tiny claws out of his clothing when they get stuck, and can usually be found sitting on the floor, letting the kittens crawl all over him.

Most of the charges he'd been holding in the video have returned to the general population, but he keeps one of them--an orange tabby--close to him, which he lavishes an extra amount of affection on. After a while, it stretches out sleepily in the crook of his arm, having accepted its fate with all the dignity of a spoiled prince knowing it's been singled out.]</sub>

Who's a good kitty?

_{[Stage whisper:]}

You. You are.

_{[He taps the tabby on the nose and its eyes flicker open to look at him. His heart melts a little more. When he's absolutely, positively sure no one's watching, Anders leans in to kiss its head and when he it mews, he knows he's in cat-love. He's no Ser Pounce-a-lot, but he's stolen Anders' heart all the same.]}

Ballroom.

[beforeblue]

[There are cats. Wow, they really weren't lying. That is a lot of cats. And they are all fucking adorable.

Wash walks into the ballroom staring around him with the kind of awe usually reserved for armour upgrades, and carefully steps through the mass of them towards the man sitting bang in the middle.

He has never seen so many cats in his life. This is awesome.]

Hey uh... you said you were giving away cats.

[circlejerked]

<sub>[Wash's wonderment is shared by Anders, who's currently engaged in throwing a toy with streamers hanging from the end. Watching half a dozen kittens go stumbling after it with tails jutting in the air is just about the best thing he's seen all year. Baby darkspawn descending on a kill just doesn't have the same appeal.

He looks up at the voice, and so does the orange tabby sitting on his leg.]</sub>]

I did! And here you are.

_{[And here they are. Wash can see for himself there's quite the selection.]}

They're free for the adopting! _{[His gaze drifts down to his lap buddy.]} Well, except maybe this one. I'm growing a little partial to him.

_{[Understatement. There's a disproportionate amount of orange tabbies in the mix thanks to Anders' fondness for good old Mr. Wiggums and Ser Pounce-a-lot.]}

[beforeblue]

[Oh no, they are so cute. He watches them stumbling across the floor. They look barely old enough to be left alone by their mother, although who knows how that works in Wonderland?]

He is very cute.

[He sits down and holds out his hands, waiting for the kittens to approach him. They do so eagerly and he soon has a couple of kittens curls up on his lap, and one trying to climb onto his shoulder.]

So, how did you end up with this many cats?

[circlejerked]

<sub>[Anders thinks so, too, but then again, he thinks they're all cute beyond measure. Very little in Wonderland has made him relax--he knows that beneath Wonderland exterior, this is a trap meant to bribe them into complacency just like the Circle--but this is one indulgence that hits him right in the softest part of him.

He hadn't been wrong about a cat livening up the place. A bit of time playing with these guys and he can almost forget how nerve-wracking a weekend of jumbled emotions had been.]</sub>

Wishful thinking?

_{[How had this come to be? The easiest answer is that Wonderland must have sensed what he wanted to make him feel most like himself again.]}

It was my own fault, really. I went to retrieve something and wasn't paying attention to what I was thinking.

[uncaging]

[Elizabeth almost trips over a cream coloured kitten as she enters the ballroom, gripping onto the doorknob to steady herself before the delight breaks over her face at so many tiny, adorable balls of fluff.]

Oh, they're so precious!

[circlejerked]

_{[Aha, another resident looking for a companion, perchance?]}

And as healthy and happy as any kittens I've ever seen! You could almost be fooled into thinking they're from a normal litter--an exceptionally large one.

_{[Anders comes over to greet Elizabeth and coax the curious adventurers amidst the group away from the door before they can escape between her feet.]}

What do you say, you want to hold some, don't you?

[uncaging]

Is it all right? They look so fragile, I don't want to hurt them by accident.

[She's never been up close to animals like this before, though a four-legged companion of her own is something she's long wished for.]

[circlejerked]

_{[He seems to find what she says funny and chuckles.]}

Trust me, they'll let you know if they don't like something. They've got a good set of lungs and an even better set of claws, and they know how to use them.

_{[Bending, he picks up one of the more docile-looking kittens which hangs loosely in his grip without so much as a squeak of complaint. He discreetly checks--it's definitely a girl--before presenting the female to Elizabeth.]}

Try one on for size and see for yourself.

ballroom

[slapfight]

[Peridot hears a ruckus coming from the ballroom and naturally she is forced to see what it is, due to a combination of curiosity and a need to yell at someone for interfering with her daily "argue with the mirrors to see if anything happens."

what happens when she opens the door is a tiny little ball of fur rushes at her legs in a desperate vie for freedom. She screams.]

What is that- OW! Get your sharp little touch-stumps off me, you- [she flails wildly and ends up on her back while the kitten kneads its claws into her leg and hisses at her.]

[circlejerked]

What's the problem?

<sub>[Whoever's screaming is ruining his blissful kitty-induced zen. Anders has no choice but to see what's going on. If the kittens are ignoring the litter he'd carried over and doing their business on people's shoes, they're going to get a talking to. Chastising your cats in a baby-talk voice counts as disciplining, right?

But there's no yellow messes to mop up, as he finds. Unless one counts Peridot herself, a beacon of eye-shocking yellow and green color.]</sub>

Break it up, you two, let's keep things clean.

_{[He's not entirely sure what Peridot is, exactly, but she seems vaguely female and distressed, which prompts a gentlemanly urge to step in with a friendly joke. He bends to help her, waving the kitten off.]}

You all right?

[slapfight]

[the kitten drops to the floor and proceeds to wind itself around Peridot's tiny legs as if it did nothing wrong and this crazy green lady is just being a freak for no reason. Peridot is fairly certain this is a threat display and tries to step back, only to fall on her butt with the cat purring and rubbing against her hip.]

What is this thing? And what is it doing? [she tries to push it away, but it starts rubbing against her hand instead. she gasps.] Is it releasing spores into my body to slowly rip me apart from the inside?

[circlejerked]

It's a cat! Do they not have cats on your planet?

<sub>[He assumes this is Planet Everything Is Green. Even as asks the question in a tone of disbelief, he admits he hasn't seen the likes of Peridot before, either, so in the end they're probably even.

Her vivid imagination earns a note of amusement.]</sub>

Looks to me like he's trying his best to implant feelings of affection in the hopes you'll pet him. He must like the color green.

i. fourth floor; two tvd girls for the price of one.

[interpersonal]

[ wonderland's latest event put the girls through the wringer in different ways. but that's okay! if the mystic falls scooby gang is good at anything, it's moving past brutal events with relative ease—arguably to their own detriment. elena feels emotionally hungover, but you wouldn't be able to tell unless you're really looking. little miss on a mission is all purpose and drive as she and bonnie explore the fourth floor. the youth center is there, and they have ideas.

these ideas might have to wait. the most adorable kitten has moseyed over to bonnie and elena, playing with their shoe laces. heart immediately melting.

elena gingerly picks up the fluff ball, cradling it to her chest. ] Hey. Where did you come... [ her voice trails off as she looks ahead. it's like they're multiplying. kittens. kittens everywhere. is oprah hiding behind one of these doors? ] Uh. Bonnie? [ please tell her you see them, too. ]

[goeth]

[ bonnie's eyes pop wide, precipitating the squeal that builds from her chest. no chill bonnie? who's that? ]

Oh no!

[ the words are ones that usually mean bad things but the way bonnie's voice lilts upward (combined with the fact that she's rushing toward them) probably explains that this is anything but bad to her. she drops to her knees, and tries to corral them as they come in. ]

Where do you belong?

[ ...someone tell her that cats don't understand english? ]

best discount

[circlejerked]

_{[Anders is beginning to realize the obedient, well-behaved Ser Pounce-a-lot has spoiled him. Getting the attention of multiple cats that want nothing more than to climb the furniture and tussle with one another is an entirely different kind of challenge.]}

Here, here, here, kitty, come here! I have some treats for you! I have a whole treat just for you!

<sub>[A kitten hotfoots it out of a room, barrelling off for parts unknown with Anders' in pursuit, cajoling, and whistling, and doing everything short of casting a barrier spell to stop it. (Someone should also probably tell him cats don't speak the lingo.)

Trying to snag a kitten one-handed while hugging an armful of others to your chest is another kind of challenge he hadn't been prepared for when he'd woken up this morning. He's never played a goldfish scooping carnival game, but if he had, he'd probably suck at it because the kitten evades an attempt to snatch it up and bounds in the girls' direction.]</sub>

Runaway cat! Would someone mind?

Fourth floor

[fatherlesskind]

How did you drag me into this again? I think I'm still bleeding!

[Alistair tugs at his torn shirt, which rips a little further in protest, trying to peer down it around the cats in his arms. It's.... not very successful and he gives up after a minute, turning his attention back to their charges. And his complaining. Which doesn't stop him letting one of the kittens chew on his fingers and another bat energetically at his face when he bends down too far.]

Why did I let you drag me into this? I should have just- [Whatever he should have done the world will never know as he spots another escape in progress. With a panicked look down at his armful and back to the rapidly disappearing cat tail he turns back to Anders.] Quick, take these before he gets away!

[circlejerked]

Oh, it's just a scratch. _{[Anders brushes Alistair's complaint off with a reassuring smile.]} I don't know how magically transfigured cats work--this could be their first time out in the world. They're exploring! Learning their ABCs!

<sub>[And exploring Alistair's chest with their claws is a part of the learning process! Before he can drop a kitten or one manages to squeeze out of his hold, Anders rushes into his room to deposit them into their temporary pen he'd constructed using the basket they'd appeared in.

By erecting a small barrier along its rim, the cats couldn't easily climb out of the basket without scaling the invisible edge. For the most part, it looks to be working aside from a few bold escape artists who've climbed on top of their fellows and tumbled out again. One of the re-captured kittens bobs up on its hind legs to greet him, crying fiercely for attention, and he stops to stroke its head before returning to Alistair.]</sub>

I've got them, I've got them! Aw, come to Anders, kitties. _{[With a comforting coo, he takes Alistair's bundle into his arms.]} These are a lively bunch.

[fatherlesskind]

[Tiny scratches hurt the worst of all, how can Anders not appreciate that fact?]

They could learn with less scratching.

[But if Anders refuses to appreciate his plight then at least he is willing to let Alistair chase after the ones making a run for it without a squirming armful. Passing his charges off he darts off after the runaway, coming back a minute later with a cat in each hand.]

He ran into a friend out in the hall. Lucky for me no one's door was open. [Otherwise he would have had to sneak into someone's room to retrieve them and knowing his usual luck? That wouldn't have gone down well.

Carrying them over to the basket he puts them back in with the others. Hesitating only a moment, Alistair scoops up the loudest one and wanders back over to Anders with it cradled against his chest, mewling all the while.]

What are you going to do if no one else wants one?

[Because he's pretty sure the answer is 'keep them' and that means there's going to be a room full of cats living right across from him. And given how this day has gone so far? He's not sure he can handle that.]

ballroom!

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys pokes in quietly, trying to step softly and not cause a lot of noise, but she's mobbed upon entry and ends up squeaking a bit in trying to keep the door closed without trampling any. Eventually she just sort of gives up trying to get through the hoard, and sits down about halfway from the door to where Anders is sitting, letting them climb all over her lap.]

Uh... h-hey! You're, uhm, the one g-giving the cats away, right?

[circlejerked]

<sub>[Anders is pleased so many people seem to be interested in spending time with the cats and helping out with them. Worst case, he'd thought he'd have to figure out what to do with them all by himself--there's only so much a single man can do!

After their video conversation, Anders is prepared for seeing Alphys' appearance up close, but it's still quite a sight to look over his shoulder and witness her sit down among a throng of frolicking cats.]</sub>

That's right.

_{[He slides around to face her, keeping a hold of a cat balanced on his shoulder so that it doesn't topple off in the movement.]}

You... like cats?

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys smiles as a cat climbs it's way onto her knee, tripping into the space where her lab coat is stretched over her legs. It catches like a hammock and the kitten circles around, messing with the empty space. Meanwhile, she can feel another trying to conquer her tail. They're not biting or clawing at her yet, so she'll let them stay. No harm no foul after all. Still, she musters her best friendly smile at Anders when he turns, gently patting the one sitting on her coat.]

Y-Yeah! I uhm, h-had a friend who was a cat, a-actually. She had, r-really wanted a pet cat too... or, w-well, I think she had wanted to b-be a pet cat? Maybe b-both. But I've never, uhm, h-had a cat like this, before. There, uh, w-weren't any, where I used to live.

[Not many house cats underneath a mountain, after all.]

[1908]

[ Because no one can resist a tiny face with big blue eyes, Adaline comes into the ballroom not too long after their conversation on the network. ]

...This is a lot of kittens. [ ok she'd said that before but this is seriously out of control. ]

[circlejerked]

<sub>["Will you walk into my parlour?" said the spider to the fly. Of course, in this case, the parlour happens to be a ballroom full of cats and the spider a mage patiently entertaining them with a series of toys, but the metaphor still stands. Adaline has come to meet her doom at the hands of small, furry animals.

Anders looks up from waving around a stick with a bright purple cat tail toy hanging from its end. One cat takes advantage of his pause to bite it and roll onto the floor to start trying to thrash it out of Anders' grip.]</sub>

You're telling me!

_{[Anders' relaxed smile says he's enjoying the chaos, however.]}

Welcome to our temporary cat sanctuary.

[1908]

[ So many felines. Holy crap. ]

How...did this happen, again?

[ Not that it's a bad thing. It's amusing and they're awfully sweet. Ish. To look at. Kittens can be holy terrors. ]