OPEN | well, i don't know where they come from but they sure do come

[circlejerked]

Who: Everyone and some adorable, rolly polly, purring kittens.
Where: Ballroom.
When: April 4th.
Rating: PG? It's kittens, how bad can it get.
Summary: As advertised, Anders wished for some kittens, now there are kittens, please adopt a kitten, kittens everywhere.

The Story:

<sub>[In the ballroom with plenty of space for them to romp around, Anders and Alistair set the kittens loose.

When he'd been thinking about them, Anders had had a particular image in his mind: a bunch of kittens sitting in a padded wicker basket like something out of a graphic illustration or inspired by a toilet paper brand. Who wouldn't find that adorable? That's exactly what he'd gotten, and exactly what they load the kittens up in to move them downstairs. Once the basket is deposited in the center of the room, some stay napping in its cushioned confines, others tumble out to explore.

Anders takes the time to bring up food, water, and litter. After some internal debating, he scatters some cat toys around the room, too. Welcome to Wonderland's one and only kitty daycare, for a limited time only!]

(OOC: Don't worry about threading with Anders or Alistair if you want to join in just for kittens. Consider this a mingle log where you can make your own posts, tag around, etc.)</sub>

Comments

OTA

[circlejerked]

I. Fourth Floor

<sub>[The cat rodeo has come to the fourth floor and the main event is literal cat herding. Ever tried to keep track of a bunch of small animals after they've spilled out of your closet like packing peanuts? It's harder than it looks!

Reinforcements had arrived in the form of Alistair (banging on someone's door and shoving cats in their face is a good way to get them involved in your problems), but it's still a trial to keep the kittens in one place for any length of time. Anyone in the vicinity might have an energetic kitten scamper across their path, or see Anders himself trying to catch them or coax them to him with a "here, kitty-kitty."]</sub>

II. Ballroom

<sub>[Anders is, simply put, in heaven.

Once the cats have been rounded up, that means it's time to play with them. All of them. As many as he can, anyway. And they're all so cute, every single one! Dotingly, he scoops food into dishes, rolls balls across the floor, gently pries tiny claws out of his clothing when they get stuck, and can usually be found sitting on the floor, letting the kittens crawl all over him.

Most of the charges he'd been holding in the video have returned to the general population, but he keeps one of them--an orange tabby--close to him, which he lavishes an extra amount of affection on. After a while, it stretches out sleepily in the crook of his arm, having accepted its fate with all the dignity of a spoiled prince knowing it's been singled out.]</sub>

Who's a good kitty?

_{[Stage whisper:]}

You. You are.

_{[He taps the tabby on the nose and its eyes flicker open to look at him. His heart melts a little more. When he's absolutely, positively sure no one's watching, Anders leans in to kiss its head and when he it mews, he knows he's in cat-love. He's no Ser Pounce-a-lot, but he's stolen Anders' heart all the same.]}

Ballroom.

[beforeblue]

[There are cats. Wow, they really weren't lying. That is a lot of cats. And they are all fucking adorable.

Wash walks into the ballroom staring around him with the kind of awe usually reserved for armour upgrades, and carefully steps through the mass of them towards the man sitting bang in the middle.

He has never seen so many cats in his life. This is awesome.]

Hey uh... you said you were giving away cats.

[circlejerked]

<sub>[Wash's wonderment is shared by Anders, who's currently engaged in throwing a toy with streamers hanging from the end. Watching half a dozen kittens go stumbling after it with tails jutting in the air is just about the best thing he's seen all year. Baby darkspawn descending on a kill just doesn't have the same appeal.

He looks up at the voice, and so does the orange tabby sitting on his leg.]</sub>]

I did! And here you are.

_{[And here they are. Wash can see for himself there's quite the selection.]}

They're free for the adopting! _{[His gaze drifts down to his lap buddy.]} Well, except maybe this one. I'm growing a little partial to him.

_{[Understatement. There's a disproportionate amount of orange tabbies in the mix thanks to Anders' fondness for good old Mr. Wiggums and Ser Pounce-a-lot.]}

[beforeblue]

[Oh no, they are so cute. He watches them stumbling across the floor. They look barely old enough to be left alone by their mother, although who knows how that works in Wonderland?]

He is very cute.

[He sits down and holds out his hands, waiting for the kittens to approach him. They do so eagerly and he soon has a couple of kittens curls up on his lap, and one trying to climb onto his shoulder.]

So, how did you end up with this many cats?

[uncaging]

[Elizabeth almost trips over a cream coloured kitten as she enters the ballroom, gripping onto the doorknob to steady herself before the delight breaks over her face at so many tiny, adorable balls of fluff.]

Oh, they're so precious!

[circlejerked]

_{[Aha, another resident looking for a companion, perchance?]}

And as healthy and happy as any kittens I've ever seen! You could almost be fooled into thinking they're from a normal litter--an exceptionally large one.

_{[Anders comes over to greet Elizabeth and coax the curious adventurers amidst the group away from the door before they can escape between her feet.]}

What do you say, you want to hold some, don't you?

[uncaging]

Is it all right? They look so fragile, I don't want to hurt them by accident.

[She's never been up close to animals like this before, though a four-legged companion of her own is something she's long wished for.]

ballroom

[slapfight]

[Peridot hears a ruckus coming from the ballroom and naturally she is forced to see what it is, due to a combination of curiosity and a need to yell at someone for interfering with her daily "argue with the mirrors to see if anything happens."

what happens when she opens the door is a tiny little ball of fur rushes at her legs in a desperate vie for freedom. She screams.]

What is that- OW! Get your sharp little touch-stumps off me, you- [she flails wildly and ends up on her back while the kitten kneads its claws into her leg and hisses at her.]

[circlejerked]

What's the problem?

<sub>[Whoever's screaming is ruining his blissful kitty-induced zen. Anders has no choice but to see what's going on. If the kittens are ignoring the litter he'd carried over and doing their business on people's shoes, they're going to get a talking to. Chastising your cats in a baby-talk voice counts as disciplining, right?

But there's no yellow messes to mop up, as he finds. Unless one counts Peridot herself, a beacon of eye-shocking yellow and green color.]</sub>

Break it up, you two, let's keep things clean.

_{[He's not entirely sure what Peridot is, exactly, but she seems vaguely female and distressed, which prompts a gentlemanly urge to step in with a friendly joke. He bends to help her, waving the kitten off.]}

You all right?

[slapfight]

[the kitten drops to the floor and proceeds to wind itself around Peridot's tiny legs as if it did nothing wrong and this crazy green lady is just being a freak for no reason. Peridot is fairly certain this is a threat display and tries to step back, only to fall on her butt with the cat purring and rubbing against her hip.]

What is this thing? And what is it doing? [she tries to push it away, but it starts rubbing against her hand instead. she gasps.] Is it releasing spores into my body to slowly rip me apart from the inside?

i. fourth floor; two tvd girls for the price of one.

[interpersonal]

[ wonderland's latest event put the girls through the wringer in different ways. but that's okay! if the mystic falls scooby gang is good at anything, it's moving past brutal events with relative ease—arguably to their own detriment. elena feels emotionally hungover, but you wouldn't be able to tell unless you're really looking. little miss on a mission is all purpose and drive as she and bonnie explore the fourth floor. the youth center is there, and they have ideas.

these ideas might have to wait. the most adorable kitten has moseyed over to bonnie and elena, playing with their shoe laces. heart immediately melting.

elena gingerly picks up the fluff ball, cradling it to her chest. ] Hey. Where did you come... [ her voice trails off as she looks ahead. it's like they're multiplying. kittens. kittens everywhere. is oprah hiding behind one of these doors? ] Uh. Bonnie? [ please tell her you see them, too. ]

[goeth]

[ bonnie's eyes pop wide, precipitating the squeal that builds from her chest. no chill bonnie? who's that? ]

Oh no!

[ the words are ones that usually mean bad things but the way bonnie's voice lilts upward (combined with the fact that she's rushing toward them) probably explains that this is anything but bad to her. she drops to her knees, and tries to corral them as they come in. ]

Where do you belong?

[ ...someone tell her that cats don't understand english? ]

Fourth floor

[fatherlesskind]

How did you drag me into this again? I think I'm still bleeding!

[Alistair tugs at his torn shirt, which rips a little further in protest, trying to peer down it around the cats in his arms. It's.... not very successful and he gives up after a minute, turning his attention back to their charges. And his complaining. Which doesn't stop him letting one of the kittens chew on his fingers and another bat energetically at his face when he bends down too far.]

Why did I let you drag me into this? I should have just- [Whatever he should have done the world will never know as he spots another escape in progress. With a panicked look down at his armful and back to the rapidly disappearing cat tail he turns back to Anders.] Quick, take these before he gets away!

[circlejerked]

Oh, it's just a scratch. _{[Anders brushes Alistair's complaint off with a reassuring smile.]} I don't know how magically transfigured cats work--this could be their first time out in the world. They're exploring! Learning their ABCs!

<sub>[And exploring Alistair's chest with their claws is a part of the learning process! Before he can drop a kitten or one manages to squeeze out of his hold, Anders rushes into his room to deposit them into their temporary pen he'd constructed using the basket they'd appeared in.

By erecting a small barrier along its rim, the cats couldn't easily climb out of the basket without scaling the invisible edge. For the most part, it looks to be working aside from a few bold escape artists who've climbed on top of their fellows and tumbled out again. One of the re-captured kittens bobs up on its hind legs to greet him, crying fiercely for attention, and he stops to stroke its head before returning to Alistair.]</sub>

I've got them, I've got them! Aw, come to Anders, kitties. _{[With a comforting coo, he takes Alistair's bundle into his arms.]} These are a lively bunch.

ballroom!

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys pokes in quietly, trying to step softly and not cause a lot of noise, but she's mobbed upon entry and ends up squeaking a bit in trying to keep the door closed without trampling any. Eventually she just sort of gives up trying to get through the hoard, and sits down about halfway from the door to where Anders is sitting, letting them climb all over her lap.]

Uh... h-hey! You're, uhm, the one g-giving the cats away, right?

[circlejerked]

<sub>[Anders is pleased so many people seem to be interested in spending time with the cats and helping out with them. Worst case, he'd thought he'd have to figure out what to do with them all by himself--there's only so much a single man can do!

After their video conversation, Anders is prepared for seeing Alphys' appearance up close, but it's still quite a sight to look over his shoulder and witness her sit down among a throng of frolicking cats.]</sub>

That's right.

_{[He slides around to face her, keeping a hold of a cat balanced on his shoulder so that it doesn't topple off in the movement.]}

You... like cats?

[1908]

[ Because no one can resist a tiny face with big blue eyes, Adaline comes into the ballroom not too long after their conversation on the network. ]

...This is a lot of kittens. [ ok she'd said that before but this is seriously out of control. ]

[circlejerked]

<sub>["Will you walk into my parlour?" said the spider to the fly. Of course, in this case, the parlour happens to be a ballroom full of cats and the spider a mage patiently entertaining them with a series of toys, but the metaphor still stands. Adaline has come to meet her doom at the hands of small, furry animals.

Anders looks up from waving around a stick with a bright purple cat tail toy hanging from its end. One cat takes advantage of his pause to bite it and roll onto the floor to start trying to thrash it out of Anders' grip.]</sub>

You're telling me!

_{[Anders' relaxed smile says he's enjoying the chaos, however.]}

Welcome to our temporary cat sanctuary.

Open

[fatherlesskind]

A - Literally herding cats

[Inevitably during the trip downstairs several of their charges try and make a break for it. And with as many as there are even the best Wardens can lose track of a cat or two. Alistair has taken the job of rounding up a few escapees, wandering the halls between the fourth floor and the first, discreetly peering into open doors and calling out-] Here Purrlock, come on, where are you?

[In his arms he's carrying two more would-be apost-cats which squirm and mewl, trying to reach sweet freedom once again. With a sigh he lifts up one in each hand and gives them a stern look.]

If you two aren't going to help me find Purrlock there will be no more sightseeing. You can go back to Anders and stay there, got it?

[The lecture seems to go over its targets heads as the pair continue to cry out for freedom. Some cats don't know how good they've got it.]


B - Free to home. Any home will do.

[This is so not how Alistair envisioned spending his day when he woke up this morning.

There's a hole in his shirt that's getting steadily larger, he's pretty sure he's still bleeding from the claw marks on his chest and he's spent who knows how long chasing kittens around and ferrying them down to the ballroom. There's been plenty of whining from him every step of the way as everyone from the fourth floor down can attest. And yet he really doesn't appear all that put out once the lot of them are corralled in the ballroom.

Watching the multitude of cats scamper about he occupies himself running back and forth after them, capturing any attempting to escape the room or rescuing ones that get themselves in trouble. He always has at least one keeping him company as he wanders about, cradled in the crook of one arm, draped over his shoulder or, occasionally, peeking out of the hole in his shirt.

More importantly, as soon as he spots anyone in the ballroom without a cat on them he immediately makes his way over to give them one. This is not a negotiable transaction. These cats need homes or there's going to be just a room full of them across the hall from him and even kittens can cause trouble in numbers.

Coming up to one such cat-less person, he deposits a squirming body on them.]

Here you go! I think she likes you.

[Or isn't immediately running away. Good enough.]

B -

[sheriffing]

( Look, this is all a misunderstanding. Emma didn't come down here in search of a cat. She saw the feed and heard the meowing and figured maybe the could use a hand, that's all. Henry has a dog and everyone knows those are two animals that don't get along. She can't do it. Adding a cat to their existing problems in Wonderland just doesn't work. And unfortunately for Alistair, handing her a kitten and walking away isn't going to guarantee this one a home.) Actually I can't -

( But then the kitten brushes her paw against Emma's hand when she goes to set her down, and she makes the mistake of looking down at the crying kitten who must have something against going back down on the floor with the rest of them. ) Don't look at me like that.

( That's to the cat, not to Alistair. All of her attention is on the wiggly furball currently attempting to climb her shirt. Crap. )

[fatherlesskind]

Convincing aren't they?

[He's pretty happy about any sign of weakness in the face of sad kitties. Whatever that can't that came before was about it has no bearing on his plan to try and force a kitten on the woman. Look, it's trying to climb her, it's meant to be.

Wiping the grin off his face he puts on his best, most woebegone expression and whines plaintively at her.]

I told you she likes you. And she needs a home. You're not going to leave a poor little kitty all alone with nowhere to call home are you? What will she do? Where will she sleep?

[Truthfully he has no doubt that Anders will take any that aren't adopted back with him to keep. Across the hall from Alistair himself. And sooner or later that is going to spill over to him somehow, he's sure. So she has to contribute to keeping Alistair's future from being drowned in cats and kitty litter.]

B

[littlestreetcat]

[ She'd heard the word "kittens", okay? So she's here. What do you expect? Her freaking nickname is Cat, so sue her if she's got a ridiculous soft spot for cats! Not that she's defensive about it or anything because it totally doesn't ruin her generally more "tough" outer image that she likes to portray.

Once a cat's been dropped into her arms, Selina's gaze naturally goes up to see just who set it there. And she recognizes that face from her first broadcast after getting to Wonderland.

Oh. This guy. ]

Having some problems?

[ She smirks up at him, though the expression softens as she glances back down to the kitten now in her arms, shifting them into a more comfortable, safer position. Once the feline is unlikely to escape--yeah, she'll keep it. She'll always look after strays--her eyes dart back up to Alistair. ]

What the hell happened? How did you end up with this many kittens?

[fatherlesskind]

[Alistair pauses after unloading the kitten onto her, trying to remember where he's seen her before. It takes a moment to click but when it does he can't help frowning, a little irritated and a little embarrassed. It's a lot more obvious how young she is when they're face-to-face and he can admit the argument they had was kind of dumb. But she was just as involved in it as he was so it's not entirely his fault. And look, he just gave her a pet. That's like apologising. Only better.

Folding his arms defensively, Alistair shakes his head.] Nope. No problems. Everything's under control.

[Except for the multitude of cats running around the ballroom and the giant hole in his shirt and the scratches he has all up his arms. But it's totally fine.]

Blame him. [He jerks a thumb in Anders' direction where the mage is communing with the cats or something.] I got dragged in when they were already here. It's not my fault.

[Just to make it abundantly clear. He's not getting blamed for this.]

B.

[araneidal]

[ In his defence, the black cat he's just shoved into her arms is rubbing its head on her shoulder. Natasha, however, glances at him coldly. ]

What am I supposed to do with this?

[fatherlesskind]

Keep it? Take care of it? You know, as a pet. You have heard of those, right?

[What's with this woman? How can she not know what a cat is for? Especially when it's being so obliging and friendly and lovable, enough that any normal person should want to take it home immediately and dote on it and reduce the population he has to deal with.]