No-one comes out of this sane

[voiceinthedark]

Who: Sam Yao and YOU
Where: All over the mansion and grounds.
When: 19th-24th
Rating: PG-13. I think. Will change if needed.
Summary: Sam isn't suffering, but he's trying to help those who have. Certain revelations might make that difficult. (Huge spoilers for S2 M39 of Zombies, Run! onwards to the end of S3)
The Story:


19th-21st

[It's easy to tell that something has gone horribly wrong. The screaming, the people staggering around, angry or staring or arguing with people who aren't there, they're kind of a giveaway. And he's not sure exactly what's going on, what the problem is.

He feels useless. There's nothing he can do to help with this, except hopefully stop anyone getting hurt, and even then, he can't protect them all the time. He does what he can, helps Maxine at the clinic, tries to stop anyone hurting themselves or other people.

When Simon comes to him, paranoid and scared, of course Sam helps him. What else can he do for one of his Runners?]


22nd

[Anger, betrayal, they make him reckless, send him stomping and spitting away from his room, away from everyone he knows.

How can that end well?]


23rd

[When Sam revives, dizzy and sick and with one less life, he's in his bedroom, although he knows he didn't die there. Doesn't remember how he got back there. He can see, even though he remembers his eyes burning.

And then he sees Alice, blood oozing from a bite and demanding to know why he didn't save her. Alice and Ellis and Chris. Archie. His parents. He'd killed them all. he couldn't save anyone.]

Comments

21st [your choice of location!]

[freewill]

[Despite all the searching, there's been no luck with finding his anchor, and it's reached a point where Castiel thinks that whoever it is, they're not here. What if it's Anna? She seems like the only option right now, and she's never been in this place, at least not during his time here.

As much as Castiel has made an effort to avoid anyone and everyone, his malfunctioning powers doesn't make it that simple. He continues to zap from place to place, his wings working with a mind of their own.

Which is how he appears before... Kevin? Or is it Sam? Normally he would be able to tell, but with his senses turning on and off as they please, he isn't certain right now.

He narrows his eyes.] Who are you?

21st

[voiceinthedark]

[He hadn't really had any destination in mind. He just knew that he needed to move. He needed to be away from that- that bastard before he did something stupid. Something that was stupid here at least, when he would just come back from death.

Like all the people at home wouldn't.

He's not paying that much attention as he heads down the hallway towards the library. It's usually quiet. Maybe he can find something to take his mind off it. Yeah, right.

There's a second he looks away, and then there's a man in front of him. Castiel. That was his name right? He's just there, makes Sam jump, his heart already pounding.

He scowls at the question, temper and patience already worn thin.]

Who do you think? I thought you could just tell.

[freewill]

[That scowl is one that Castiel returns without thinking much about it, because he doesn't think he's done much to earn Kevin or Sam's ire in this moment. Maybe he'd been startled, but Kevin should be used to his sudden appearances at least. Which means...

Well, Castiel has a guess at this point, but Kevin can definitely develop an attitude when he wants to, so he's not certain.

He glances away, frustrated that he has to admit his condition to yet another person.]

Not right now. My powers aren't working the way they should.

[Which means that he shouldn't be around people in general, prophet or not.]

[voiceinthedark]

[Perhaps not Castiel himself, but after what he'd heard, what he'd found out, no-one was likely to avoid Sam's ire for a while.

He scowls a moment longer but then slumps when Castiel explains the situation.]

There seems to be a lot of that going around.

[And then, grudgingly.]

I'm Sam.

[freewill]

[It's true that it isn't only him, but that's the way that Wonderland events work. When it comes to powers not working (or rather, working badly), it can't get much worse than an angel's. Castiel's tried not to think too hard about the kind of destruction Lucifer and Michael might cause.

Though for the moment the mansion's still standing.

As he thought, then. It's Sam.]

Have you been affected at all by this event? [It's not often that someone is completely spared.]

Nov 20

[goesdown]

[ He's truly cracking up and just thankful enough that he'd been in his room during this latest mishap as small fires had given way to a complete loss of his meatsuit, now left slumped on the bathroom floor as he floats around the mansion.

Sure, he'd tried to get back in, but after a certain number of attempted, he'd moved onto a new tactic: find Blake.

As he floats around, appearing to anyone who might see him as a reddish-black cloud of smoke, he happens on Sam and moves to float over his head. ]

Nov 20

[voiceinthedark]

[Sam has ventured out briefly. Needs a change of scenery since he's been cooped up in his room with Simon and Jo for a while. Simon's sleeping. Actually sleeping normally right now, so it seemed a good time to head out, stretch his legs.

He doesn't notice the cloud at first, not until it's right above his head, a seething black and red mass of smoke? Is something on fire?

It really doesn't look like that kind of smoke.

He walks a little faster.]

[goesdown]

[ All Crowley does is focus on Sam for a moment, but that's all it takes for his powers to go even more haywire and before he knows it, the cloud is sifting downward and entering Sam's body through his mouth.

He invades every inch of Sam's body until he's in control and Sam is trapped in his own head, conscious but without psychical control.

It's with Sam's mouth that Crowley finally speaks. ]

Bollocks. That's not what I meant to do, Sam.

23rd; voice

[voiceinthedark]

[The cloud doesn't go away. It doesn't get left behind. It's following him. He is being stalked by a cloud.

Between one breath and the next, it's inside him, sliding down his throat and into him and oh god, he can't move, he can't- It's the strangest feeling ever, like being trapped, utterly trapped in his own body. He can see and hear, but distantly, like watching a film.

What's happening to him!?]

Crowley? What happened- I can't move I- what's going on?!

22nd

[abelmedic]

[Maxine's been working hard, but sooner or later all of them need to rest. That had been Sam's idea, she seemed to recall. Rest break. For Simon's sake, if nothing else.

So it's during a lull in the traffic into and out of the clinic that she finds herself in Sam's room, achy and tired and still too paranoid to sleep, nestled in comfortably against Sam with her outside hand resting lightly on the stock of the sawed-off shotgun that never leaves her side. She sighs slowly, eyes flicking to the door for only the thousandth time, voice wry and low.]

So . . . do people totally lose it here very often? Or do I just have really awesome timing?

22nd

[voiceinthedark]

[It was nice like this, sort of cosy, or it would have been had the situation not sucked so much. Still, Simon had calmed down since being here with Sam, and Jo seemed better being around Simon. It wasn't as though he had plans to be anywhere.

He grinned up at her.]

There was the time we did the Oregon trail and Simon went hunting for Buffalo Wings.

Cuddlepile!

[luckynumberthree]

[ The groan comes from where Simon's face is buried in a pillow somewhere around Sam's middle. Luckily Sam has a big enough bed for the four of them, but its not like any of them seem to mind the impromptu puppy pile they've formed. Simon doesn't know why but the contact has seemed to help keep the terrible hallucinations and thoughts at bay, so for at the moment, he'll take what he can get. ]

I'm never going to live that down, am I?

[lightgunhustler]

[Jo still wasn't quite sure when it was that she'd let Simon drag her here, but she's piled onto the bed with the rest of them, curled up against Simon's back and taking a moment to really appreciate the peace that seems to bring. The break in the hallucinations is more than welcome.]

Probably not. We have to make our own fun. Not our fault you made that really easy.

[Hunting for buffalo wings.]

23rd; voice

[abelmedic]

Sam . . . come on.

[She's been spending too much time on her little pseudo-phone lately, trying to get in touch with Sam, but she's worried. He stormed off yesterday and hasn't been answering since, and there are people out there, dangerous people, who don't even seem to know what they're doing or who they're lashing out at.

And she hasn't heard from Sam in 24 hours. At this point she's just praying that he's just really, unprecedentedly mad at her.]

Just call me back, Sam. Please. Anything to let me know you're all right.

23rd; voice

[voiceinthedark]

[He was cold. That was the first thing. He'd lain there after he'd revived, eyes tightly shut, too afraid to open them in case they were still burnt out sockets as he'd been left.

He does eventually, and the relief of being able to see, of being in his room, had paralysed him, left him weak with relief. It even blotted out the pain of betrayal for a short time.

Not long enough, and that memory ate up more time in black anger and bitterness and grief.

Maxine's message comes through when he's still fuzzy-headed and weak, when he's ignoring the sounds from outside as the normal inhabitants of Wonderland.

He taps out a quick message.]

I'm fine. [He's not.]

You didn't tell me.

23rd; voice

[abelmedic]

I didn't. [She sighs, relief blunted more than a little by that accusation.] I didn't know what good it would do to tell anyone. And the bad it did would have been punishing Simon for something he didn't entirely do, and when he's in a place here where he can't do it. It . . . I didn't like keeping it from you. But I liked the alternative even less.

23rd; voice

[voiceinthedark]

He did it though! He... he killed Archie! He got you captured by Van Ark! He sold us all out!

[There's a noise at the door and he glances over, a flicker of movement, and then it's gone.]

All of us! Jack and Eugene and Janine... all of us, for his own...

[Did he think that the rest of them weren't terrified of dying too? Did he think that Sam hadn't lain awake at night, crying because he swore that he could hear them in the darkness.

There's another flicker of movement. Dark hair, a soft voice.]

...Alice... [It's soft, little more than a murmur.]

20th

[vates]

This event hits Kevin hard and fast, though he's only died twice; maybe it has something to do with how this was almost exactly his life for a little while. He isn't thinking about it in those terms, though; actually, he's barely thinking at all, too busy running from visions of Channing and his mom, too busy hiding from demons, too busy marking up every surface he can find and raiding closets for salt.

He staggers into the hallway; he hasn't showered in a day, and he's barely eaten, either. It seems too important to mutter to himself, stopping here and there to scribble another sigil on the wall, dodging the reflections of himself in the mirror because sometimes he sees things in there that he doesn't like, like --

Himself, staring back at him from inside empty sockets. Kevin lets out a yell and turns away, only to see himself at the end of the hallway, without any eyes, coming toward him.

"No!" he shouts, holding up his hands. "No! Not you!" Frantically, he fumbles to yank the frying pan off his belt.

20th

[voiceinthedark]

It's a familiar voice that greets Sam when he finally steps outside. Familiar and more scared than he's ever heard it. Even in Oregon, when Kevin had been delirious and dying, he'd never sounded like this.

"Kevin?" Sam calls back, taking a few steps towards his twin, concern obvious on his face. Kevin what-" He looks terrified and when he reaches for a frying pan Sam holds up his hands, taking a step away. "Kevin, it's me. It's Sam."

[vates]

Sam? No, Sam's tall, and white, and his hair is longer, and he has both his eyes. It's Sam who kills him, or Sam's body anyway, Sam's face is the last thing he saw before he couldn't see anything anymore, before his soul was burned out of him. This is the first time this vision has spoken to him, though, and that's an interesting change. Then the vision changes; now he's looking at himself with two whole eyes, and that definitely hasn't happened yet.

What if he has a chance to change the future? What if he can keep it from happening again? It makes perfect sense to him right now, and he drops the frying pan to instead lunge at Sam, grabbing onto his shirt.

"He's going to kill you!" he shouts, his eyes wide and red and full of fear. He gives Sam a shake. "Do you hear me?! He's going to burn your eyes out!"

[voiceinthedark]

Kevin lunges for him and despite everything, Sam jerks backwards, an automatic reaction by now. Kevin managed to catch his shirt though, and Sam made himself stay still. Up close, Kevin looked worse, like he hadn't slept in days, half mad if Sam was being honest with himself.

His eyes widened at what Kevin said and he grabbed Kevin's shoulder when the other man started to shake him. "What? Who is? I don't understand! Did someone hurt you?"

Later on the 22nd

[luckynumberthree]

[ The room had fallen silent and dark as most of them had drifted off to sleep, because no one could claim this event wasn't proving taxing and exhausting for all of them. It was late when the dreams started again for Simon, who'd rolled away from Sam in the bed and was currently curled around a pillow, clutching it with a white-knuckled grip as his dreams took a darker turn, influenced by the guilt and hallucinations of the event. He whimpered, then cried out, thrashing faintly from where he layed curled on the far edge of the bed. ]

Later on the 22nd

[voiceinthedark]

[Sam had been asleep, curled up on the bed after an exhausting day. It wasn't as though he felt like he'd even done much, but the stress of it, of seeing Simon in such a state, that took it's toll.

He's ended up sprawled out in an ungainly heap on the bed only to wake up when he feels movement. He grumbles and stretches, rolling over into the empty space at his side.]

Simon?

[luckynumberthree]

[ Normally he's a fairly light sleeper. Normally it would have been enough to wake him. But nightmares weren't so easily shaken. Not when they wore familiar faces, bloodied or grey or worse. They chased him, and no matter how fast he ran, he couldn't outrun them, nor their accusations, whispered in his ears, shouted in his mind.

Not when they were true, after all.

All that slipped past his clenched jaw was a strained whimper however, choked and breathless and broken. ]

[voiceinthedark]

[Sam blinked a few times, eyes adjusting to the darkness, and he stifled a yawn against the back of his hand before crawling over to Simon's side. He reached out to shake his shoulder, gently first, then a bit harder.]

Simon! Simon, c'mon. Wake up. It's just a dream okay?